Not sure how to title this just help help help before I go insane !

[Sunshine1991]

My dd 17 months doesn't eat she's loseing weight.waiting for hospital appointment she got weaned at 6 months with homemade foods Okish til she turned one. Then it went down hill she's been ill a few times this year two ending with 999 call then a and e. she started loseing weight ( last time she got done was just under 20ibs ) no matter what I make her it ends on the floor or on me you name it ive tried it . It's really getting me down am worried about her even now just posting I want to cry I hate meal times which isn't helping her eat more anyone with anything that can help please post am willing to try anything now
Here's what her food looked like today Tia
Breakfast branflakes milk banana yogurt she had few branflakes and yogurt
Lunch chesse on toast with oatcakes and grapes had some grapes
Dinner homemade beef burgers super milkshake ( its what I give her now I just put a lot of stuff in blender and put it in her cup ) had her super milkshake
Snacks are mainly rice cakes biscottis has water and 7oz bottle before bed please don't have a go cos she's still on bottle at bed some days that's all she has :(

can you leave.little plates of food dotted about. dont acknowledge her eating from them. dont make eye contact just walk past when she is nibbling. sounds in part like a battle of wills. I am not a doc though so she may have a medical condition.

we used to have a picnic in the living room with teddies. tv on and singy songs. anything to distract her.

hugs too as you must be stressed x

I would offer her higher calorie food but very small amounts, and guess leave some snacks available.

Does she like cheese? What are her favourite foods?

Biggest thing is to try and relax, but that sound incredibly difficult under the circumstances

Getting her checked by docs is obviously the best thing to do. You poor thing . In the mean time try distraction? We did colouring at the table with ds when he decided eating meals was taking time out of his busy play. Plate of food in front of him, I would do the colouring under his direction and he would join in on and off. Also agree with having plates dotted about, have food in different places/contexts. She may like the novelty?

Getting her checked by docs is obviously the best thing to do. You poor thing . In the mean time try distraction? We did colouring at the table with ds when he decided eating meals was taking time out of his busy play. Plate of food in front of him, I would do the colouring under his direction and he would join in on and off. Also agree with having plates dotted about, have food in different places/contexts. She may like the novelty?

theres always food about i let her have a full packet of ricecakes todays cos thats pretty much the only thing she wants to eat i dont know what to do

Have you tried leaving different foods out for her? Apologies if you've already been down this route. Popular finger foods in this house are: plain pasta, cherry tomatoes, cubes of cheddar, cut up ham, cut up hot dog sausages, cucumber sticks, breadsticks, berries of any sort, cut up apple. Just leave on a plate in the living room. Switch on the telly to take the pressure off and try not to watch her! Sometimes if ds is engrossed in cbeebies I have been able to post food into his mouth which he eats kinda without thinking. This is what worked for us in times of desperation. Once she's eating then start worrying about getting her at the table etc.

thanks everyone am just about to try give her breakfest am going to try make it

My friends DD was like this - tiny/hospital referrals/failure to thrive - kept losing weight & wouldn't eat. They had lots of referrals & help and support from dietician/nutritionist.

Anyway, long story short, she did grow out of it and is now a big strong fit teenager. Access all the support you need and hopefully there will be light and the end of the tunnel.

Try make it fun

Milk to drink whenever she likes.

Avoid things like branflakes, oatcakes.

Think about texture and colour. We eat with our eyes. Make it playful - make a face out of things on a plate. Bits of veg, bread sticks (if making at home, try using a cheese straw recipe but miss out the cheese - though make cheese straws as well, never know what she may like).

Avoid mixing things together, little pots from which they can help themselves. Some children hate having things mixed.

Try things like:
Cheese in cubes
Scrambled egg
Cucumber with the skin cut off, sliced thin.
Raw carrot battons
Cooked carrot battons. (Some children will eat veg cooked, others prefer it uncooked)
Peas
Toast with butter, Toast without butter - see which she prefers.
Pieces of cold cooked meat
Fish fingers cut into chunks
Fruit
Custard - try it warm, cold.

Don't put too much choice out, don't put too much quantity. If she eats all, you can always make more. How much she eats will vary.

Get her hand and make a fist, that is the size of her stomach, so use that as a guide to the quantity of food.

Dd1 refuses to eat anything if there is too much on her plate - I think it is just too daunting for her. She has a number of small portions rather than obe regular sized one.

Good luck today! Good idea to make sure she taking vitamins. Are you in touch with your health visitor?

Experiment with cereals.
Try half a wheatabix covered in lots of milk then mushed up.
Ricecrispies with a little milk. Also try with no milk.
If you want her to have oats, try porridge. Try with and without sugar.

Try rice pudding (you can buy it ready made in small pots, some have added flavours).

Bread - will she eat it if it is cut into certain shapes, such as thin rectangles (soldiers), triangles, squares, circles. Does she eat it toasted?

Cakes, biscuits - homemade or brought. She can help make, help decorate.

Sweetcorn - it's a nice bright colour.

Tuna mayo - some will prefer this on it's own, rather than on bread.

Some children like things you don't expect them to, such as smoked salmon on cream cheese in a sandwich.

I can only share your pain.

My dd was a NIGHTMARE until she was 3ish.

She lived on a diet of dry toast, cucumber, cheese, carrots, broccoli, pasta and yoghurt. That was it.

Once I accepted that this was all she was going to eat I let her have it. I would of course put new things on her plate and they most went untouched.

Then she started communicating really well, and we turned a corner. She now tries everything, sometimes she likes it, sometimes she doesn't. But that's ok because we're finding new things she does like and we add them to her diet.

You're definitely doing the right thing by going to the dr. In the meantime you could get a pretty ice cube tray and put little bits of food in the sections and let her have feed her toys and you with it. You have the same and feed her toys and her. Then feed yourselves.
Also get her involved with spreading soft butter onto bread, mashing soft fruits and avocado, giving custard/yogurt a mix before putting into bowls etc.

Hand holding because it is bloody tough and really hard to deal with.

Someone I know's DC followed a similar pattern and had celiacs disease - once diagnosed and on the right diet she put the weight on and is totally fine now, several years later (obviously she'll always have the dietry restrictions). Is she being tested for this?

I would second those who have said let her graze, have food put in the middle she can help herself to.

Will she eat rice cakes with something on? Spread things like hummus, avocado, cream cheese?

My kids both like very savoury things, and have done from a young age. Will you dd eat-
Makeral pate?
Smoked salmon
Olives
Garlic prawns
Hummus with raw veg
Salami
Chorizo
Garlic bread

Often dinner is some raw veg, a hunk of bread and butter, some slices of salami.

Ds did this. He mainly had milk, toast and some fruit at home. Occsssionally cheese. Ate a bit more at nursery. Then, when he was 4, they did about healthy eating at nursery. He's eaten most things since. Often reluctantly, but it gets eaten.

A friends DD was similar and they cracked it by having a tea party with her dolls and teddies and real food. Small toy plates etc, one spoon for teddy, one for DD etc, sharing breadsticks with teddy etc On a picnic rug on the floor

Very colourful, fun food and it became a huge game. Then moved to a big girls plate for DD with a couple of dolls at the table.........

DD now aged 14 and eating like a horse, still remembers it!

I think if you can rule out medical issues that will be a huge weight off. Then you'll know it's that you've got a battle of wills/picky eater on your hands.

DS would only eat the blandest of foods: virtually everything in his diet w white: white bread/Philly cheese/banana/Milky Bars/milk/chicken/pasta

Here's the thing if its not medical she won't let herself starve. If you can mentally resign yourself to just feeding her what she will eat you can relax a bit and then it's not so much of a kick in the gut every meal time.

As others have said, don't make meal times an event. Just put the food out and let her get on with it.

It gets better. DS's favourite dinner now is a roast

She's not haveing any of it playing games seems to be makeing her eat less. I can't wait til we get the hospital appointment so we know if its just fussiness am in two minds if it is. Sigh sigh sigh

My DD will not eat if I look at her or even so much as touch her spoon. It's really annoying but that is what she is like so I serve her a meal and then busy myself in the kitchen. When she stops eating I just get her down and don't discuss what she has or hasn't eaten. She may be picking up on your completely understandable anxiety but try to pretend you don't care....

Am trying not to look at her as she's eating her tea am just on the ipad eating so fingers crossed thank you for helping means a lot when I've asked ther mums before in rl they often talked how there baby's eat tons and tons not helpful at all

Sunshine they all go through stages don't beat yourself up. My dd was excellent, she is now not fussy but does not eat much in one go like she used to. I think ignoring her eat is a good thing to try, I think my dd feels under pressure if I am looking and starts saying no no. However hard it is at the moment she will get better at eating. Tonight my dd ate a piece of buttered bread, 2 tiny bits of chicken, 1 piece of tomato and half a satsuma. That is all she has eaten since 11.30am but its still food and I am not worried.

she didnt eat lots but more i think it worked yessssss yesssss :):):)') cant stop smileing now xx

Brilliant, as long as something went in then that is good. What did she manage to eat? Keep doing it and don't stress or mention anything about it when she is done.