Is breast feeding middle class?

[Charingcrossbun]

A few comments I have received recently have started me thinking, not that it matters at all but, is breast feeding like having humous as a staple of your weekly shop?

Was breast feeding in pub yesterday and DS was crying as I winded him. A women came over to me with a 6/7month old and told me that was why she bottle fed and it was much easier. She made me feel like I was being a bit of a martyr. Obviously she was trying to be helpful so I just smiled and thanked her. I overheard another comment from mums waiting outside the sure start centre "you can tell it's the breast feeding group by all the posh prams".
Just wondered if other mumsnetters had noticed
this?

Well the DC are 15 and 12 now and I only occasionally think about it. Perhaps more than I would do by being on here where it is discussed a lot more than is normal everlong.

I do feel for women having babies now having to make decisions about it.

Majority of my friends aren't parents yet but they all seem quite grossed out by the idea of BFing, especially for anything other than a very small newborns. We're all middle class and mostly white. I'd say that the expectation is to try for a couple of weeks or so if you'd like to.

Oh, that's depressing, Farmyard! I don't understand why people are "grossed out" by the idea of bfeeding. It's not disgusting or weird at all :-(

I know. I suspect that it's because they're not parents yet though. It may change. For now, I think that boobs are pretty much sex related only.

I have to say, being pregnant and giving birth pretty much raises your tolerance of "gross" things!

Bit off topic but not everyone thinks that BF is lovely, and I am sure some think it's disgusting and/or weird. You are allowed to feel how you like about it IMO.

Of course, Sparkling, and I am allowed to disagree, and think that it is unfortunate that some people feel that way.

YY that's what I am saying EBB everyone had their own opinions about BF none ar right or wrong.

Thanks for the link ExBrightonBell This really leapt out at me-

"However, the proportion of mothers following current guidelines on exclusively breastfeeding for the first six months of a baby’s life have remained low since 2005 with only one in a hundred mothers following these guidelines"

I think given the general pattern (try to breast feed, have problems, give up) I don't think its so crazy or irresponsible to choose not to from the beginning. It can be more like excusing yourself from the drama and heartache.

I'm from a much more working class background that my DH and one thing we remark on is how much more fatalistic I am about health than he is. I think it probably is a wc trait. For my part I find his conviction that you can avoid catastrophic diseases by avoiding cling film, British Beef etc.. foolhardy and neurotic. Death is watching from the wings and laughing at his conceit Mwahahahaha!

When I wrote about breast/bottle feeding on my blog I described it as a "quick and dirty lesson in compromise," the first point where you may have to reconcile yourself to doing- not "the best" for your child but "the best in the circumstances."

My guess is that WC mothers are just more at peace with compromises of that sort.

I live in an area thats got lots of grants to support bf because I think its one of the lowest rates of bf in the country and its also ranks pretty low on incomes so I'd say is mainly working class. I was often the only person at the bf support group...
Have made some nice mum friends through other baby groups and the general consensus was that they either simply didn't want to do it - too difficult and there was a level of 'yuk' viewpoints given, but the main one was the view that it restricted their life - couldn't easily leave the baby with someone, either in the day or overnight so may as well formula feed.

I think breast feeding is hard and takes a lot of time. If you have toddlers, little help, are not well, finding breast feeding difficult, have a child to collect from school then bottles are an easy option, especially if you are on benefits and get tokens for formula.

Breast feeding is a teeny tiny part of being a mother and whilst I think mothers should be empowered to do it I also think they should be empowered to switch to formula if it isn't working out for them.

But OP your thread made me a smile a bit. I now have a vision of all the middle class babies sipping houmous and griddled salmon with powdered lime leaves through their milk and the working class ones sipping greggs sausage rolls and fizzy drinks through theirs. Makes one think about the breast is best argument though - which assumes the mother is rested enough and well nourished enough to produce good quality milk.

As pp have said, it's not as simple as 'class' - but yes, factors such as the mother's level of education and age are relevant, especially for white British groups. Several BME groups have pretty high bfing rates and the group with the lowest bfing rate is white British mothers in low-income groups. All in the bfing survey as linked above.

On a slight tangent, this is partly why I was so baffled by the plan to incentivise breastfeeding in deprived areas by paying the mums in vouchers. BF already has a financial advantage over FF so if those mums aren't bfing, then the reasons are far more complex than simply financial.

Maternal nourishment doesn't generally affect the nutrition in milk, unless the mother is severely under nourished or on the verge of starvation. Basically this would be very unlikely in the UK. Milk production is prioritised biologically.

You also don't need to be well rested, although of course it's more pleasant if you are!

Mothers pretty much always produce good quality milk though - you would have to be very undernourished indeed for your diet/lifestyle to affect the quality of your milk supply, because for breastfeeding mothers' bodies, producing nutritious milk is a top priority.

Anyway, in answer to the thread question, yes there does seem to be a correlation between socio-economic class and breast-feeding, with middle-class mothers more likely to do it. Also, there is a certain entrenchment that happens within families - grandmothers tell their daughters (who are now mothers) that they couldn't breastfeed, and so the daughters think that they themselves can't.

I think young mums find it harder to separate boobs feeding from boobs sexual, given they are still at the fashion, make up, selfie, trying to find a boyfriend stage of life.

It takes guts to BF in the park in front of the same gang of friends you were smoking behind the school sports centre with last year.

Also young and older working class mums are all more likely still to live in their home area. So again they have to get their tits out in front of friends and family, which may be embarrassing.

Education about BF in this circle may be poor, comments may be made.

Many MC mums are older, they have moved from their childhood areas, their friends are older and often met through NCT/toddlers etc. BFing infront of friends who are BFing or have BF themselves is very different.

So is BFing out and about in a medium sized city, where I rarely meet someone I know, compared to my childhood home town where it would have been inevitable.

This can be factual and not snarky. There is absolutely a link with income - it comes up in stats like these government ones where privileged urban areas have bf rates of 70%+ and deprived ones closer to 20%.

It is not saying anything about judging parents of any class - it's about social norms, expectations and most importantly support. If you don't have anyone around feeding, if you hear from your mum or even more from your partner that it is gross, or if you don't have a supportive midwife / HV who is used to feeding, or maybe you have one who is judging and dismissive, or you are younger and less educated than she is (again this is stats and averages for first time mums in Durham vs kensington, I course lots of people buck this trend!), then you are less likely to stick with it.

We were broke as they come when we had dc1, and I got crap support and had noone around me feeding, I felt like a failure because it hurt, and then believed people who said I just didn't have milk, people gave me bottles and I just fell into ff even though it was not my first choice - but by dc2 DH had a good job and I could afford a lactation consultant, some help around the house so I could cluster feed rather than clean - it was like a different world of child rearing, and bfing was suddenly manageable. To me this is more about wealth than class.

(Two points there, not two separate views )

CustardFromATin, agree that it's not about judging. Ignoring the socio-economic aspect of breastfeeding is not going to help to get the rates up.

I don't think it's appropriate to say that there is a link between a woman's level of education and whether or not she breastfeeds or formula feeds. I'm a Solicitor with a first class law degree, I'm well aware of the benefits of breastfeeding but after a long struggle and my DS losing too much weight I switched to ff. It wasn't an easy decision and I had my heart set on bf. One should never assume that people who ff have had a lesser education, that is quite ridiculous in my opinion.

Natale28 The breastfeeding report found a correlation between education and breastfeeding among white women. Its not cause and effect and obviously it doesn't mean that we can assume that someone ff is uneducated.

Custard It's really interesting to hear your experiences and how different motherhood is depending on income.

I can only offer anecdotes, but in my very MC (although I think I'd prefer to say educated as I suspect that's what we really mean) group of friends we have a 100% BF until 6 months rate. I think this also backs up the support side of it - over time those of us who started earlier helped the others. There's at least 6 of us now.

Also, I am a peer supporter, but was allocated an extremely deprived area. In 18 months I have had 2 request for help/support and only 1 of those was taken up on.

Natale28 I think you slightly miss the point. You and I as educated women tried very hard to BF, we regret not succeeding.

If you have another DC, I assume you'll try to BF again. I did and DD2 was a dream to BF (and refused to touch a bottle ever).

This thread is not about trying very hard and giving up when mum or babies welfare is suffering. It's about not trying at all or giving up at the first hurdle.

It's about living in communities where very few people BF and almost no one BFs past six months.

Where most parents and grandparents didn't BF and where granny is round the corner to babysit and letting her FF while you go out with your mates is so tempting.

It's living in a soviet that sees sciencey fucking follow on milk adverts and believes the muck really is better than breast milk for babies over six months

Natale, with respect we are talking about trends, not about how intelligent you personally are.

Nah, definitely not. I breast fed all mine and anyone who thinks I'm middle class should probably make their way to Specsavers immediately.