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Sudden dummy refusal - causing stress.

7 replies

Writerwannabe83 · 27/05/2014 12:32

DS is 9 weeks old and has had a dummy for about 4 weeks now. It took him a few days to get used to it but then was happy to use it. We only offered it at bedtimes because he had horrendous colic and it was the only way to calm him down before he exploded with his screams. It really was a saviour at times.

However, for the last 3 nights he has absolutely refused his dummy. As a result he is screaming and screaming for hours on end - it was 4 hours last night and ended up with me in absolute tears because I'm exhausted. For the last 3 nights I've been been getting about 3-4 hours interrupted sleep. He will sometimes accept it and suck it for about 5 seconds but then he either spits it out or rips it out his mouth with his hand.

Ironically he is constantly chewing on his hands - whenever he is awake he's got his fingers in his mouth, chomping on his fist etc and this is all new behaviour as well.

He used to self settle really well in his MB whereas now he just cries whenever he's in it. He used to be a settled baby in the day but now he spends lost his time crying and will only sleep in my arms.

I'm getting no respite during the day, I am 100%taken up by him! I'm exhausted and upset because I can't bear to see him like this. I just don't know what to do and I can't cope with him hearing him cry all the time.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
KatyN · 27/05/2014 18:38

Just had to check but mine learnt to take his dummy out at about 12 weeks. It was dreadful. I would be up 3/4 times in the night just popping it back in.
I used to hold it in until he settled back to sleep.
In another month or so he'll learn to put it in himself and you can sing with delight (at that point out about 5 in his bed in case they drop out).

K

CurlyhairedAssassin · 27/05/2014 18:43

Ds1 started teething at about 10 weeks, and he refused his dummy too but was obviously frustrated at not being able to use it so would cry and cry. Frustrating all round!! Try teething powders and some calpol and you'll soon know if it's teeth

Forgettable · 27/05/2014 20:40

What happens if you feed him instead of trying the dummy, he might well be doing a growth spurt and is cueing for feeds?

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QTPie · 27/05/2014 21:41

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Writerwannabe83 · 28/05/2014 03:17

Thank you everyone for your replies.

My first thought was 'feeding cues' but he was just doing it constantly. For example, I'd feed him, he'd be there for a good 20 minutes before taking himself off and then when I lay him back on his play mat/Moses basket/my arms, he would instantly start doing it. After this going on throughout the day I thought it can't be hunger because he's even doing it straight after he's fed.

Strangely enough, after all the screaming last night it was giving a small dose of Calpol that preceded his sleep. I didn't give it thinking it was his teeth, I was just at the end of my tether, thought his screams must be related to discomfort of some sort and so gave it.

DS has been like a different baby today!
He slept for the following:

11.00-15.00
18.30-22.00
23.00-03.00

He's falling asleep again now after his feed...

There's been no screaming at all today.
He has however been dribbling quite a lot.

I have a DH and we have a shift work type arrangement going on so we can alternate between us...one of us watches DS whilst the other sleeps in the spare room. I've just come to the main bedroom to feed DS after having 4 hours in the spare room which is where my husband is now.

We never seem to spend the whole night together on the same bed anymore Sad

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KatyN · 28/05/2014 06:25

Hurrah for calpol.

My hd and I hardly saw each other for the first 6 months... One of us was asleep when he was at home. It will get better!

QTPie · 28/05/2014 08:12

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