Nightmares/screaming 2 year old

[Sunshine123]

Has anyone got any advice on nightmares? my 2 year old has been waking up screaming (a horrid hysterical scream) normally around one hour after going to bed and then it can be as much as 10 minutes apart for the next hour and then 2 or 3 times during the night. It's completely exhausting and i'm not even sure that she's awake when she's screaming but does seem very frightened. What could it be? it doesn't seem to bare any relation to what she's' had for dinner and it's showing no sign of stopping. We leave her door open, landing light etc but she still is so unsettled. Poor love is completely exhausted and hasn't slept properly for weeks - know the feeling!!!

message withdrawn

message withdrawn

It might be night terrors, not nightmares at all, if she doesn't wake up. Have you tried not doing anything at all? Sounds awfull, I know, but the person having the night terror is rarely aware of it and therefore rarely distressed. Trust me, I know this because I go through phases of having them.

There are two ways to handle this (from my own experience). One is to do nothing at all, just go on with the routines and environment she's used to, but to go and sit with her when she screams. That way if she wakes and needs you you are there for her. She might scream for 5 minutes or so, then lie back down and continue sleeping as if nothing had happened, or she might wake not understanding why she woke and need a bit of reassurance - but no fuss.

The other way is particularly effective if the night terror starts at a consistent time, as it seems to be doing. Rouse her 10m or so before you would expect her to start screaming, or, if she always does somehting (thrashing for example) immediately before screaming, then as soon as you see her do it. She wouldn't need to wake up completely, just enough to change the level of sleep.

There was a documentary on sleep a few months ago on BBC (The Trouble with Sleep(?)), in two parts, one of which was children. There was a little girl who woke up with a night terror, like you describe, about 1 hour after going to sleep. It had become a habit, and the parents were advised to wake here just before it was due to happen, make sure she was awake, have a cuddle and a small chat and then let her go back to sleep. Quite quickly the habit was broken and she went back to sleep. Sorry, I can't remember it too clearly, that's all I can bring to mind. But someone else may have a better memory! HTH.

Prettycandles post wasn't there when I started - sounds like she knows what she's talking about. I meant to add that I really do have sympathy - my ds1 had a full-blown night terror at about 3.6, eyes wide open but didn't recognise me or dh, just blood-curdling screaming. Hope you get it sorted asap.

Sounds like night terrors. My sister used to have them as a toddler too, and they do start around this age bracket.

Some of the advice my mum got was:

• if doing it regular time - try waking her up gently just before hand so as to try and break the pattern - may take time to readjust but may also help stop them completely

• do NOT try and wake her during the terror, just follow her and talk gently to her to keep her safe and to soothe her (may not feel like you are helping but may be)

• she will grow out of them naturally - not much help that one though

thanks for all that advice - have been up about 6 times since 7pm most of the time she lies herself back down after a quick rub on the back and some soft words of reassurance but on the odd occasion she has woken herself up and is even more distressed.

I don't generally go a bundle on the 'children in parents bed' scenario, but in this case I might be tempted. At least you'd all be getting a bit more sleep, and it might break the cycle.

Is there anything that might be putting her under a bit of stress? New nursery or family tensions for example. Being overtired can contribute too - so of course it doesn't help that her sleep is broken up. Does she still have a daytime nap?