Help me plan a successful day?

[WeGotThere]

Hi,

I have a just turned 2yr old DD who (for now) attends nursery 4 days a week and a new 5weekold DS. Because of family visiting and DHs holiday and paternity leave Friday is going to be our first day with just me and the 2 children.

I know I am just being a bit over anxious because I'm tired and emotional still but I'm beginning to panic a bit. My DS is just coming out of the nice newborn sleepy phase and becoming more demanding. I.e. He screams when he is put down, lengthy feeding sessions, wants to be held/rocked to sleep etc... And while my DD is coping really well with the changes she understandably gets a bit fed up and whingey when I'm holding him for long periods.

My plan so far is to make sure myself and DD are up washed and dressed before DH leaves, lunches made night before and changing bag packed ready to leave at a moments notice.

Any top tips, suggestions for activities etc? I think I need a mixture of ideas of things to keep her busy with minimal input from me and short entertaining activities I can do with her in the 20minute sleeps he'll have in his Moses basket!

I had a similar gap - DD was 21mo when DS was born (now 3y9m and 2yo). My top tip to myself that I have developed over time is to only plan one thing a day. I used to try to cram in a whole load of stuff, and then everyone got overwhelmed and tired and things would go wrong.

I always make a rough plan including meal plans in the morning. I check the weather, work out what essential things I need to do - e.g. food shopping, drs appt etc., then plan for one outing e.g. park, farm, zoo, cafe, playgroup.

Having bag ready to go is a great idea - I still haven't got this down properly; am forever being caught out without a change of clothes! And it's nice to have lunch ready, although sometimes I think the day goes quicker when you actually have things to do like preparing lunch, sorting stuff out, baking etc. that you can get DC involved in.

It does depend a lot on what your DD is like - my 2yo DS is now playing happily with his vehicles by himself, and will do this for a good long time, whereas at the same age (and even now) my DD will spend no longer than 5mins willingly playing by herself.

We used to do a lot of playgrounds (I found I could manage breastfeeding and pushing swing at the same time if necessary!, otherwise just kept DS in pram as long as I could); playgroups are brilliant for letting older one go off and play whilst you sit with baby, or someone holds baby for you whilst you have a cup of tea.

Also have lots of books around so you can try and look through a book with DD whilst feeding baby.

Sorry, that's totally incoherent, but if I try and go back and edit it into sense I'll probably get fed up and just delete it. Good luck for Friday; it'll probably be much easier than you are anticipating.

Thanks oif,

I know I'm building this up; have just had 2 difficult days with DS screaming whenever I put him down.c
I think if weather is good we'll be fine. She plays happily in garden only wanting me to chat/listen to her commentary and she loves park, ducks etc... But if it's raining we'll find it harder - she is too shy to do soft play without me going in with her and only toddler group I can find is in afternoon 1-3 and she usually sleeps 1-2.15ish.

Having a plan for the day sounds good, will maybe plan an outing for the morning and then we can do stuff at home in afternoon.

I did that, outing in the morning and then home in the afternoon! Good luck!

Your post has taken me back, OP!

Does your 2 year old still nap?

I used to break the day down into 30 minute segments when I felt like this. Using the sling helped a bit. Once you've filled in eating and sleeping, getting dressed, getting the 2 year old out for a bit of fresh air, some down-time (this stage was the only time I've ever used audio books, that used to fill the slot before tea!), there's not that much time left to fill.

I completely agree that not cramming too much into the day is a big part of it.

I think the biggest thing you can do is be kind to yourself - it sounds like you're really organised which will help massively but everything is going to feel relatively chaotic for a bit anyway!

Sorry, x post.

It rained for months after DD was born, it was a right pain! We had some comedy outings, making all the effort required to get out, only for my previously undeterred DS to crawl frantically into the pushchair and ask to go home

My dd2 was a Velcro baby. I slung her. Not for everyone but it saved my sanity. She lived in the sling, bar feeding, and was totally content. Meanwhile, I could walk dd1 to nursery, the park, cafe etc. Don't panic; the terrifying phase passes quickly.

Thank you everyone, you've cheered me up after a traumatic bedtime. DD was overtired and smacked DS in face for attention. Just what I needed when I'm feeling wobbly!

I have a stretchy wrap sling but don't feel secure with it yet so am going to the local sling library in a couple of weeks to find one that suits us better. DD hated slings til she was about 4 months so am hoping it was because I never found the right one as I can really see the advantages.

Have decided we're going to the park in morning if weathers ok and maybe museum if it's raining - she'll enjoy the museum it's just the getting there that's putting me off. Then home for lunch and sleep (for all three of us hopefully) and crafts in afternoon or garden if it's nice. TV as fallback.

I can do this! Xx