How do you get on with it?

[movingslowly]

My ds fell off the bed. My work is not going very well. I am exhausted. Haven't had sex in months. When with ds (10 months) I can put on a good show, but I'm worried he can tell I'm not my usual self. Sometimes I find myself crying when I push the pram. After the bed thing, I don't trust myself and am terrified of everything - windows, stairs, roads - in case I hurt him again. I seem to have most faith in my ability to keep him safe.

I am aware of how dramatic this sounds. How do you pull yourself together and carry on for the samke of your family when you're exhausted and not doing very well?

most should be lost

Dd has fell off the bed loads. My work is up shit street. Sex? What's that?

You sound so exhausted have you anyone to help? I went through a phase of this. Like I was acting and I was jetting dd down . I dont know if it was sheer exhaustion or a bit of PND.

Why don't you talk to your GP? X

Thanks playing. I have gone to the Gp and am on a waiting list for some counselling. In the meantime, I just need to pull myself together ... I know his won't be the last time I feel like this but pre-dcs I used to just hide for a few weeks I think - keep myself to myself, go to bed early, eat well etc.

none of that is possible anymore so I'm trying to work out how to cope

No advice, but just to tell you that you are not alone. Work troubles (I only went back a month ago), even worse work troubles for my husband (new job, hates it, is ill and can't take a day of sick because he hasn't got sick pay). Working on our house all ours of the day and night and no holiday till September (wanted to go in July but husband can't take time off before then). Plus, DS (9 months) is catching every nursery bug going. Sex... well, sometimes, but could be more!

One day at a time, that's all you can do. Break everything down into chunks that are manageable and just keep going. That's what I do if I'm shattered or down... In my head I set myself little tasks instead of facing a long tiring day... Just do first feed and make a cup of tea, now wash DS's face and hands and get him dressed etc etc. I'm glad you are getting help so keep that in mind when you're particularly struggling...it will get better and you will find your confidence again.

Your son falling off the bed has happened, it's over, it is in the past so try not to dwell on it (I know it must be really hard). He isn't in any more danger now than he was before so try not to worry.

Do you have anything to look forward to? Family or friends close by as support? On some days the only thought to keep me going is that I know on either Sat or Sun that my DH will take son in pram for an hour between feeds so I can lie down.

Good luck. I hope you feel better soon.

Feeling a bit better today, but struggling to think of anything to look forward to. The days just stretch out in a series of things to get through. I can't even look forward to sleep, because I get woken up by ds and always wake up feeling groggy. Just got through breakfast. Now have to get through the morning. Then lunch. Ugh.

Don't even give yourself a day to get through at a time, give yourself little milestones throughout the day. I used nappy changes, meal times,
And not easy but get out as much as possible. Baby groups, baby groups, baby groups. Or a cup of tea in a cafe. The park. A walk in the pram at school finishing time, my dd loved watching the kids running about) Getting out is hard when you're so exhausted and this stage seems never ending (it is. Believe me. Been there) but just muddle through as much as possible.
I started doing avon around this time in order to force myself out of the house. I don't earn much money at all but it got me out and talking to people. And i met some nice people.

Just wanted to add I know how you feel. There are days when I am literally counting the hours until dd's tea-time and then her bed. I was diagnosed with pnd a few months ago and have counselling and ADs which are helping, but days are still shit. Have you looked into charities that do counselling? You'll get seen much quicker than on the NHS and all you need to do is just make a small donation.

Just a tip, but I sometimes feel better if I feel I've achieved something - ie done some ironing or hoovered the carpets - things you can see as you'll know you've achieved something. Oh & try to get some fresh air each day. Hang in there

What's your diet like?

How much exercise are you doing?

You sound depressed :(

Try and get more fruit and veg in. Make sure you get out every day for a good walk.

Make sure you get some time to yourself. Pass baby to DH and get yourself ready. Just little things.

Do you have any other mums to talk to?

I keep on posting and my posts get lost ... Good advice to look at what I'm eating. It's just what the baby eats + chocolate , which is not exactly nutritious.

I have just had a cup of tea and am letting the baby play on his mat while I mumsnet. Gearing up for dinner time. I have decided I am going to wash the bathroom floor tomorrow, which will hopefully feel like something worthwhile.

I am trying to accept that I might feel like I am doing everything wrong, but ds still needs me to be consistent and positive.