Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Flip

Original poster

Playbarn birthday party sibling attendance etiquette

14 replies

FullySwindonian · 08/05/2014 02:18

I'm a lone parent. My youngest age 4 has been invited to a birthday party at a playbarn. His sister age 7 can't be covered childcare wise.

Do I just take her along too and allow her to join in (obv not the party food part) or pay separately for her entrance fee?

I'm confused as the previous playbarn party for my eldest, the mother particularly said that it was ok to bring a sibling.

What's the etiquette?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

SavoyCabbage · 08/05/2014 03:49

This is what I did. Make it VERY clear to her that she is not going to the party.

Also that she can't hang round with her brother the whole time as he will be with his friends.

I never let mine join in even if the host said they could as I wanted each of them to know that sometimes you go to a party and sometimes it's your sibling that goes. I didn't want either of them saying 'but when I went to Simon's party, she was allowed to join in'.

I didn't ever explain myself to the host, but I did make sure that my child had no impact in the party at all. Obviously there are other dc in a place like that and you pay for your own child.

SanityClause · 08/05/2014 05:47

Why do you have to stay?

blackteaplease · 08/05/2014 05:55

Do you know any of the parents well enough to ask them to take your 4yo? I wouldn't drop and run with a 4yo. The last 3 soft play parties I have been to children have got overexcited and cried a lot.

I would call/text the party mum and explain lack of childcare. Pay for your child and buy them some food. I would be happy with that if I was hosting.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Events & celebrations Families General parenting

pushmepullyou · 08/05/2014 06:18

I would pay the 7 year old in as they won't be included in the numbers for the party booking. This happens frequently older and younger siblings at our school and is no issue at all. There's no way I would leave a 4 year old unattended at a play barn!

monkeytennismum · 08/05/2014 06:28

Take your older sibling. But for politeness just let the mother of the birthday child know what you are doing. That way there is no room for misunderstanding.

lougle · 08/05/2014 06:49

If you take her you need to pay the entrance fee and buy her own food to eat outside of the party room, or the party host will be charged.

Delphiniumsblue · 08/05/2014 06:50

I can't see why you need to stay. Drop off and pick up. If you need to stay just make it clear to the older one that she is not part of the party, she is old enough at 7 yrs to understand. Get her to take a book to read. I can't see the problem, mine are only 20 months apart and didn't go to the same parties.

blackteaplease · 08/05/2014 12:33

Do people really drop 4 year olds at parties and leave?

My eldest is 4.5 and I have never been to a party yet when they're dropped off. I am expecting that to start when they hit school.

Original poster

FullySwindonian · 08/05/2014 12:48

What is with all the drop and run stuff everyone's recommending? You can't do that at a public playbarn anyway.

There's two years age between them, they're very close. At 4 years old, my son doesn't have set friends in Reception yet, so he'd enjoy her company there. They do everything together.

Yes, I think paying for her attendance is best.

OP posts:

hippo123 · 08/05/2014 18:53

If it was my 7 year old I would just have them sitting next to me playing on my phone or something.

EatDessertFirst · 08/05/2014 19:00

Call/text the hosting parent/s and let them know your 7yo is coming. Definately pay her entrance fee. As for joining in, ask the hosting parent if they don't mind, but do prepare for having her sit with you (ipad, phone maybe).

I wouldn't drop and run a 4yo at this type of party. IME my DD gets a bit overwhelmed and is very emotional and tired towards the end of playtime.

BikeRunSki · 08/05/2014 19:03

This is what DH will have to do on Sunday. I am out all day, dd (2) has been invited to a soft play party, no one to have ds (5). I have checked with the party girl's mum and the play centre is open to the public during the party. Do dh will take them both and ds will play on the iPad. He has no interest in a toddler girls' party.

SavoyCabbage · 08/05/2014 22:26

Your son not having set friends and your two dc doing everything together changes the circumstances I think.

He's been invited as the party giver wants the pleasure of his company to celebrate his or her birthday. If he is playing with his sister then he's not going to be playing how he would with the other four year olds that are in his class. It will change the dynamic.

If everybody who came to the party brought another person to play with them at the party there wouldn't be a party.

It will also be a good way for your son to bond with the other four year olds. And make friends.

If your two are not going to play separately then you should not take your daughter or keep her with you drawing or whatever she might like to do.

You should definitely pay for her yourself.

Ohnonotagen · 09/05/2014 21:16

i have DS's 4th party this week at local leisure centre. Am assuming all the parents will stay, hope no one does drop and run as don't want to be responsible for 28 4 year olds!!

Flip