"It's not Fair!"

[BaconAndAvocado]

Was my DS2's, aged 7, cry when he found out that his best friend, also 7, is allowed to play certificate 12 games on the xbox. DS2 is not.

It was very uncomfortable as said friend's Mum ( a good friend) was also present.

In his little,head it doesn't seem fair and, as I didn't want to embarrass my friend, I didn't say what I really wanted to say - something along the lines of "mummy and daddy think its better to wait until you are 12 to play these games, etc, etc"

I can't really remember what I said but DS2 had a huge tantrum, and the whole afternoon went belly up.

What is the best way to deal with this issue? I don't want to give in but I want to make him see why.

Tia

Just say that every family has their own rules which are right for them and he has to accept that sometimes it means his friends can do things he can't do and vice versa.

I would have just said exactly what you wanted to... And just add that people have a different take on things, and that's O.K, but in your house, your rules etc
If she is as good a friend as you say/think she will have no need to be embarrassed.
One of my closest friends has a lot of different views to me in regards to rules etc, which is fine as long as my children respect her rules in her house, and her children respect mine when they come to play. No need for embarrassment, if it's something that can't be compromised on, we find somewhere else to go or something else to do...

Maybe suggest that you and DP can have a play of the games first and decide if they are alright or not, some games have restrictions that aren't always totally necessary in my opinion.
That's what my Mum did for my brothers, and what I do for my children.
We watch films/play games before we let the children play them..

he was trying to put you on the spot and manipulate you.

DD would do this with friends...scurry off and ask the other mother if it was okay before attempting to present the sleep over/party/stoppign for dinner as a fait accompli, casting me as the bad fairy for saying no.

Harsh words are required...

I'd also be issuing sanctions regarding the Xbox console, a) for asking something he knows he is not allowed and b) ruining the afternoon...seven is to old for an afternoon long tantrum

lovely advice as usual

What was ironic was that the boy who isn't allowed to play age inappropriate games was behaving like a little git whilst the boy who is was an absolute angle all afternoon.

Agree with you cats re tantrum. Needless to say, it was a screen-free zone when we got home.

angel

Seven is too old for tantrums in public (DD2 still threw them in private a bit at 7.)

No screen time seems absolutely fair.

As to 12 certificate games (and films) it's a weird classification some things seem to deserve it and something are really tame.

Any vague mention of sex = 12 despite the fact most DCs know the facts if life by Y5

nocomet although I can't remember the game, I think it was a 12 because of violence rather than sex.

It depends on the game.. I check all games and make my own mind up. Can you remember the game?

What about getting him something like blur? Its a car racing game but you can shoot other cars with power ups. I would have had it pegged at a 12 but it's actually a 7 upwards. Its mine and the younglings favorite wind down game on an evening.

Thanks gamerchick that sounds good.

At the bottom of today's upset is my general worry about the whole screen thang. Not just the age appropriate/ inappropriate stuff but the all consuming nature of screens.

DD1 was never that interested in screens and instead loved nature, playing board games, construction toys etc.

I try and achieve a balance with DS2 but his heart isn't really in it. It makes me sad.

I meant DS1. DD is only 5 and not all that bothered about the iPad etc.