Returning to work full time ;( how do you cope?

[sososotired]

I'm going back to work in less than a month and it's just dawned on me I won't see my DS for 10 hours a day!! How the hell will I cope? Full time job baby house and DH hardly ever home due to his work!
Any one else feel like me?

House doesn't get untidy when you are not in it. Cleaner once a fortnight? Online shopping. Make the most of the weekends. It is hard to start with - but it becomes the new norm. (((hugs)))

I can't lie and tell you it'll be fine but it does get easier with time.

Can you or your husband reduce your hours? 10hrs a day for 5 days a week is too long for a little baby to be in childcare. Especially a nursery (though you don't say what your arrangements are). Sorry I realise that's not helpful but it's what I think.

Your place stays shiny and tidy when you work a lot. I enjoy it, and my children do. We would all get bored staying at home

Honestly it gets easier. Yy to cleaner, if you can afford it ( and if not a strict division of household chores), online shopping, and do not be afraid to say no to anything else - extra projects at work/volunteering for this local good cause/baking a cake for a birthday/attending aunt Mabel's tea party.

You do adjust to the new norm.

Ladymetroland; I can't reduce my hours sadly but he will be at a childminder for 7/8 hours depending on DH shifts and will be with nanny one day a week. But it's still a long old day for him and me

Thanks everyone the support is great!

It really does become the norm surprisingly quickly. As others have said, online groceries to be delivered twice a week on a grocery pass thingy if possible. Also organisation helps a lot. I had a couple of dry runs before going back to work, so getting me and ds up dressed presentably, fed and out of the door with all his kit by the time we would usually have to leave on a work day. Sunday nights all clothes for everyone hung on hangers ready for the week. Also meal planning helps, I like to go to work on a Monday morning with Mondays and Tuesdays suppers prepped and chilled in the fridge so it is just a case of bunging them in the oven and Wednesdays and Thursdays suppers made and frozen so we have proper homemade food most nights (together with a couple of emergency frozen pizzas and store cupboard omelettes / pesto pasta etc). By Friday night I am ready for gin and chips though!

Also I try to do as much as poss the night before down to making the packed lunches, filling car with petrol, sterilising bottles, packing of bags, sports kits etc even loading the car if possible.

It is tough but after a couple of weeks you will be doing it on autopilot

I work 5 days a week, there's no other option for us. To be honest I'd go nuts at home and DS has a great childminder who he loves very much and I know he's fine. Housework does suffer though! (Though DH is very domesticated.)

OP you will be fine. Please don't feel bad, sad or guilty because other posters feel nursery is not ideal. You do what you have to do.

My ds has been full time nursery since he was 1. I have to work to afford our house and provide us with food and clothes. He loves nursery and is thriving, more so than if it was just the two of us I believe. Working not only pays for our life but makes me a better mother as I cherish every moment I have with him. It will be tough at first, especially when they are settling in or are poorly, but it will be fine.

Mums just can't win. SAHM feel guilty for not working of are accused of having an easy life, working mums feel shit for having to work. I don't feel guilty for working actually as I know that it's because of my wage we have the great family life that we do!

thank you for all the replies!

I'm starting to deal with the guilt!
I know why I'm going to work, so that we can afford our lovely home and car and so that we can have a good life! And it was an easy decision to make before DS was born but reality is that I love him more than I ever thought I would!