dog and newborn

[LittleBabyLucas]

I didn't want the dog especially a German shepherd! Don't get me wrong I love dogs but not right now. My partner has servere ptsd and has had 2 relapses in 2 years. He came home from his sister in laws with a gsd 8 months ago. Unknown to us we were expecting our 4th child. Only my son lives with us his 2 toddlers live with their mum who left him due to the ptsd. 4 weeks ago the dog was sent to live with his brother. I've loved every minute of not her not being here! The house is calmer and cleaner and I've enjoyed some well deserved rest. I ended up doing everything for the dog. Feeding cleaning up her mess but drew the line at walking as I could only waddle and she is a very strong dog! My partner was recently in hospital with back problems and now must walk with a stick and can't go far. There us no way we can care for this dog. This evening he told me the dog is coming back before the baby is born. I know exactly whats going to happen. He won't look after her again. I'm at my wits end I'm due in 2 weeks and really don't want the dog back! I've tried explaining things to him and all I get back is 'she is part of MY family' I don't know what to do.

Can you discuss with him about giving the dog back to the breeder?

Any breeder worth their salt will take the dog back no quibbles.

I've tried. The breeder would jump at having her back. She cost £650 and he would expect a refund. I know from previous experience that you very rarely get money back I'd be happy to lose the money but he will use it as an excuse to not let her go

So he got the dog without discussing it with you? And he's going to bring it back without you agreeing?

If you will be the main person caring for the dog they you should get more of a say than he does.

I don't want to have use the 'it's us or the dog' speech but I really can't see any other way around it

It doesn't sound like the newborn is the problem, it's the fact that you're the one who's going to have to care for the dog. I think you need to put your foot down. I love dogs, wouldn't be without my two but I firmly believe that dogs absolutely must have a few basic needs met: namely food, water, shelter, love and exercise. It doesn't sound like she would get all of this as part of your family. It sounds like you recognise this, but your DP doesn't.

Would it help to suggest that you could consider getting a dog when your child is a little bit older? Maybe even offer a timescale - say a year? And decide together on the breed (greyhounds are very lazy...).

Your partner is simply not being fair to anyone - including the dog. I think you probably have to spell this out to him. GSDs take a lot of work and you'll have your hands full.

You're also part of his family and as such have a say in what happens in your house.

It must be very easy for him to bring the dog back if he does fuck all to help look after it.

You need to put your foot down. You or the dog!

He's decided he's going to fence off a section of the garden for the dog. What with I have no idea as money is scarce! He asked me to draw up a rota for cleaning which I did Monday. He still as yet has not done a single thing. All he's down to do is dog poo dog walking dusting and hoovering. He's still not proved he can look after the house and family let alone the bloody dog! I think I've managed to get an extra week without her tho. The new excuse is that the kids are attached to her. My son is yes, but he has adapted to just having the cats in the house. His kids are only here every other weekend and spent more time with the cats and hamster than the dog! My mum has 2 dogs that are the best behaved things in the world but im not allowed to 'run away to mummy' as her dogs are there! This is really getting to me and the stress is passing onto baby who is making more and more of his presence known and I've been having regular contractions since he said the dog was coming home.