Child screaming and crying - time to give up?

[katesa]

I have read the other related threads and know this might be a bit of repetition but am DESPERATE for help and need to know if anyone has experienced this much resistance. Have been trying to toilet train ds1 for last 2 weeks, he is 3.5 and have no doubt he is ready as was sticking hand into nappy every time he did a poo and always runs into the garden to wee if he doesn't have a nappy on. Anyway, he tends to stay dry if you take him to the toilet every 30 mins or so but often refuses to go at all (despite sticker chart and prizes earned etc) This has now culminated this afternoon in an incident where he screamed his head off all the way up the stairs and when I eventually sat him on the toilet he clutched at his willy screaming "no no, I hate wee" while he was doing a wee. We both finished in tears and I am now completely at a loss. Do we give up and try again - when? Surely this can't be healthy? We have been very careful to try and make the whole process guilt-free and unpressurised but clearly its a complete f%$k up!Help help please.

Oh my goodness! Cod is the potty training guru, maybe she will see this and offer some good advice. The only thing I can offer is what worked for us. Ds going naked, or only wearing a shirt. We also spent a lot of time outdoors. Of course, we didn't want him to do a poo in the yard so we got an extra potty to put on the deck for that.

From my experience and my similar situation with DS1, I think control is the key.

I decided to give total control to him and stop talking about it TOTALLY. And after a couple of days, he would just run up on his own and get on with it.

But as soon as I gave him control, he just did it. It absolutely killed me to not say anything when it was obvious what was coming ( the 'wee' dance, the little wafts of smell) but not a thing was said, and he realised he had to take control. And fair play to him, he did.