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Original poster

When to potty train?

46 replies

mummysbigsmiles · 16/03/2014 20:18

My daughter is 18 months old and I was just wondering when some people starts their little ones on the potty?? Is 18 months too young?

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ilovepowerhoop · 17/03/2014 20:47

ds had very few accidents even though we started early because he showed signs he was ready so we followed his cue - what would have been the point in delaying it if he was ready around the age of 2?

I had him in pullups to start with as they were easier to get up and down and once he would reliably let me know he needed to pee and could hold it long enough to get to a toilet I put him in pants so there were not lots of wet pants.

Artandco · 17/03/2014 20:51

I did both boys early. From sitting confidently i put on toilet before/ after baths, slowly progressing to when I changed nappy etc.. Ds1 dry by 18 months, ds2 22 months.

ViviDeBeauvoir · 18/03/2014 01:04

DD was about 2.7. She decided she didn't want to wear nappies anymore as they were 'for babies'. She was dry from then onwards. No training required.
DS1 has just turned 3 and although he can tell when he needs to wee, he gets distracted and wets himself. As well as this, he hates pooing and withholds it. He wanted to try potty training today but had a couple of accidents so I told him he'd done brilliantly but that we'd try again another time. Much less traumatic for everyone!

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IdaClair · 18/03/2014 08:30

Dd did it just after her second birthday, two accidents in the first two days then that was it. She was however terrified of the toilet no matter what i did so used potties

Sunnysummer · 18/03/2014 08:55

Has she shown interest already? Does she dislike sitting in a wet or soiled nappy? I've always heard that girls are earlier and cloth nappies help as they are more aware of wetness, but that might be old wives tales!

As a nanny I helped with three lots of toilet training, and the one who was 20 months actually found it easiest, as she was already really upset by mess and dirty nappies, so was very motivated and also very aware of the physical sensations leading up. One was fine at 2.5 but his big brother didn't really manage until 3.5 - about the same time, I think the big brother finally got competitive, thank goodness! But the older one still wasn't dry at night until much later. Physical, but also as he was so easily distractable that he'd never remember to get to an adult/potty/loo in time.

matana · 18/03/2014 09:04

Honestly, I wouldn't rush into it - why bother if your DD just isn't ready yet? Is there a reason you want her potty trained early? If you wait until you're absolutely sure they're ready it'll be so much easier. DS was almost 3 and was pretty much potty trained within a few days. It's so tempting to cave into pressure from others, including other competitive parents, but it really does make all the difference. It depends on your dc, some are ready much earlier, but they say an average of 2.5yo for girls and 3yo for boys. They key is to listen carefully to your child and choose a really settled time when there's nothing else happening to distract them. Summer can be tricky if you have holidays planned, for example. Ime they don't just need to be physically ready, but psychologically too.

my2bundles · 18/03/2014 11:04

rootypig, the physical a readiness of potty training (bladder and bowel control) and giving your child a variety of foods plus a cup are not comparable.

rootypig · 18/03/2014 13:22

my2, I don't see why not?

my2bundles · 18/03/2014 13:26

Because a child will learn to eat different foods and use cups etc with practise. They cannot learn bladder and bowel control thro practise.

Artandco · 18/03/2014 13:32

I think most children can learn bowel control. It's only at night they cant

my2bundles · 18/03/2014 13:37

They dont learn bowel control, they gain control when they are physically ready.

rootypig · 18/03/2014 13:43

I've heard plenty of anecdotes and looked at a couple of books that say different, but I'm by no means versed in the biology, so won't overreach myself! But I do think you misunderstand what my aim is. I would like DD to be familiar with the idea of the toilet / potty and all it entails, as I think it will help us both to know when she's ready, and because it's an approach that makes more sense to me, emotionally and intellectually. She may not be dry for a long time and that's fine. I simply plan to offer the potty during no nappy time, show her that wee and poo goes in the loo, and teach her the concepts, especially that it's ok NOT to go in a nappy.

So I think my analogy works fine. I'd bet money on her being dry before she's using a knife and fork properly.

Artandco · 18/03/2014 13:44

My2 - I'll have to disagree there. I have trained/ help train 50+ children due to work. All at the age of two if not trained we would start. All work out how to use toilet within days usually/ few weeks max for the odd couple so they presumably learn

WhoAteAllTheCremeEggs · 20/03/2014 06:46

Im with bundles on this.
The son of a friend of mine actually developed a stammer during the potty training process he just found it so stressful because he wasn't yet physically able. When they put it all away for a while he was much happier and actually initiated the process again himself a few months later
I was a nursery nurse and I'm now a nanny, I find the nn's I know to be some of the most judgmental people of all when it comes to potty training ages like if some can do it at 2 then parents are 'lazy' if their own dc still wear nappies for a day more than that. I don't know why they cant have a bit more faith in human development to know that they will all get there in their own time, I always think that when my son gets to school every child will be walking, talking and using the toilet and no one will care or even know what age they were doing it.

daisy0chain · 20/03/2014 07:26

I do agree with you bundle however I do think some children need to be taught how to exercise that control.

Fuzzymum1 · 20/03/2014 14:15

my older boys were dry soon after turning 2. They both showed an interest so we went with it.

DS3 had a bad nappy rash a 21 months and we'd been reading books to him about using the potty. We left his nappy off one day to allow his bum to heal and casually suggested he could use the potty if he wanted to. He wee'd on the potty a couple of hours later and then refused to wear a nappy in the day ever again. It took about a week for him to be 95% reliable and a minor relapse a couple of months later when he got lazy but he was mostly dry at 21 months. When he had his two year development check she asked if he was aware when his nappy was wet he looked at her indignantly and said "I hab pants, I weewee on da potty!" The look on her face was priceless!

elQuintoConyo · 20/03/2014 14:45

Our DS is 2.3, he must be potty trained by 2.9 when he starts school.
I honestly haven't even started to do anything about it... He does say "wee wee" when he's done that or a poo. Would you recommend buying a potty and waving it under his nose during the day? We live in a warm climate, he's been running around in his pull-ups this afternoon. I can't justify buying a bloody book just to potty train, I'm afraid.
He has got a busy year ahead of him: potty train, go to school, go in his own room (currently co sleep). I'm dreading all of it

Theyaremysunshine · 20/03/2014 16:30

Conyo, to simplify the book I read:
Stage 1, before pants, use some sort of pot/tub in the bath and catch wee if it happens. Make massive fuss of how great that is and fuss over tipping in toilet and flushing. Plus encourage him to watch you and DH on the loo. Plus leave potty in bathroom and encourage him to explore it.
Stage 2: Identify when they're ready. Need to be able to communicate needs and have some periods when nappies are dry - so they can hold it a while.
Stage 3: have nappy free time, on a hard floor, for an hour or 2, and if he wees put him straight on the potty. If any goes in, massive fuss chocolate button. Extend these periods, doing it most days and when it suits you.
Stage 4: buy pants he chooses. Have times with pants/trousers on in the house.
Then increase times and work on going out with pants on.

Never ever criticise an accident. We just said "don't worry DS, we know you're trying really hard to do all your wees and poos in the potty".

Took us a week at 2yo. Poos took another 2-3 weeks. Dry at night too but that's just luck.

Good luck!

sabbby82 · 20/03/2014 16:33

Ds is 2 end of month and just successfully potty trained and he's dry at night. I'm surprised how well he's done as ds2 is only 4 weeks. I was tired of changing two bums.

gutzgutz · 20/03/2014 21:46

Conyo there will be a massive change in those 6 months. My DS was not at all ready at 2.3 but we started him at 2.9 and he got it pretty fast. I think we could have left it a little longer to be honest and it probably would have been even easier. But we did it in conjunction with his private nursery so he saw other children in his room going too which helped no doubt. Don't start yet if he's not showing any signs or interest, it'll just be too stressful.

elQuintoConyo · 22/03/2014 21:51

Thanks There and gutz

We actually bought a potty this afternoon afyer he sat down in the garden, wriggled out of his trousers, ptetended to do a strainy poo, said "all done", wiped himself with a leaf and carried on playing with his cars!

When we got home with the potty, we just let him.play with it. He stripped off completely and sat in it sometimes back to front and played. Nothing was done in it, but he is exploring and that's enough for now.

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