I dislike my 17 month old.

[Frazzledx100]

I have 4dc. My youngest is 17 months and I really don't enjoy him. I don't thinking have ever bonded with him and if I'm honest I wish we had stopped at 3dc. He has moaned and whinged since he was born. He has been so much harder than my older dc. It's not as if he us denied attention as the others are at school. I am really starting to dislike him.
I'm not sure if I didn't bond with him as a baby. He almost died at birth and my dh and I had marriage difficulties throughout his first year, which I don't think helped. Things are getting better now, but I don't seem to want to be with dc4.
I prob enjoy his company about 10% of the time, but the rest if the time I hate it. Could I be suffering from pnd? Have I had it since dc4 and not realised? How can I fix things?

If he's whinging and being needy it's probably because he sensing how you feel. You really need to seek help over this asap, or you risk damaging his self esteem for ever over it.

:( Oh this has made me really sad.

You could well be suffering from PND.

Poor baby :(

You could be suffering pnd, yes ... But also, do you ever get a break from him? It's a really hard age he's at.

What do you do for fun?

Poor frazzled.

I'm sorry you're feeling like this, op, sorry for you and all your children. Please see a doctor about this, if it is pnd and it sounds like it to me, you need to get it sorted. Your child, and you, deserve it

Your poor child.

Honestly you don't sound well. He nearly died at birth - that alone must have triggered something. Please please please for the sake of you and your family, speak to a GP or HV. This will affect your dc4,and your other children as they will pick up on your feelings. My mum had a similar issue with my sister and I can't really understand my mum and find it awful of her.

Sorry you're feeling so down

It sounds like you've had a very bad time and could well have pnd. Can you get an urgent appointment with your gp and/or talk to your hv?

Do you manage to get out with your son while the others are at school? A local mum and baby/toddler group or your children's centre might be good for people to chat to? Or if you prefer going to the park/library/feed the ducks with him?

Do you get any 'me' time? This is really important - going round to a friend's, an evening class or just a nice bath with a glass of wine and nice bubble bath - whatever you feel you would enjoy.

Do you have anyone who could help or give you a bit of company in the day? A mum, friend or sister?

From your post it sounds like you are a SAHM? Are you happy with this? Is a little p/t job an option? Just a few hours a week while your dc goes to a nursery? I know you'd be paying for childcare but it might just give you a break? Or can you afford for him to go to nursery say one day a week so you can have a break?

I hope you start to feel better soon xx