Working at home - dp - and a new baby in the house?

[mousiemousie]

Anyone have any experience of this?

I am thinking it must be nice and relaxing to have someone else around all the time - but will dp ever get any work done?

yes, we've done that when I've been on mat leave, and in fact most afternoons all the time. If your dp is like my dh, yes he will get work done, but the screams are distracting sometimes. You just have to be a bit disciplined, but then you have to be a bit disciplined to work from home in the first place.

It's nice to have lunch together though.

Dh works from home and has done ever since ds1 (9) was born, so has been through two newborns. It's fantastic: a real privilege to have so much flexibility. Dh does a lot of evening and weekends too, which means we had a lot of daytime time together.

Newborn stage is a breeze (as far as working from home is concerned); the tricky bit is once they are more mobile, noisy and active: you need to establish clear rules for the children as to when/where they may or may not disturb daddy.

Dh works from home but not always at home iyswim, and very flexibly, so if the children were getting on his nerves he would just go out and do something.

I think full-time writing or editing or something would be much harder.

Will be very interested to see what the answers are, as we're going to be trying the same thing come November.

We are assuming that, for the first couple of months, dh will be taking on less work, and he does have the advantage of a workrom that's right at one end of the house...but what else do we need to know?

echo all roisin has said

(in fact have notion that our dh's may be in similar lines of work??)

only thing that dh misses out on is that lovely "daddy's home" reaction that other daddies get when coming home at night as ds expects daddy to be in most of the times we get home from our activities...

Sounds great! I am not asking for myself, but have 2 families I am close to about to experience this situation. Both have small homes though so I imagine this is harder than if your home is large.

Tassis - dh is a Baptist Minister. You?

Twocatsonthebed - it depends on the work. Phones drive me slightly crazy from time to time. (Ours rang constantly this afternoon/early evening.) If this is likely to be the case for you, and you can afford it, a separate phone line is a godsend, or a secure messaging service, and make sure you have a phone with caller display so you can attempt to not answer his calls. (Maybe that's just me?!)

I think it helps to set out some baseline ground rules: once you get stuck in you can re-negotiate and see what suits well. Some people find it useful to specify certain times when they are working, and times when they are not, times when they are working but disturbable (for phone calls or visitors or nightmare nappy changes!) and times when they are not to be disturbed for anything. Others prefer to be very flexible.

I found it a bit tricky when ds was little and used to protest before dropping off at naptimes. Dh's study was next door and I used to feel he was getting annoyed or upset at ds crying. Once he was a toddler ds had to learn not to interupt daddy when he was working (thankfully the study in the present house is built on at the back and fairly sound proof!!)

I love having lunch and coffee breaks together. Have to try not to get annoyed when he pops out to the garden to talk to his plants and I'm busy ironing or whatever. Definately think through the phone issue. Also I have to try to be disciplined not to interupt him all the time...

(roisin - church of scotland minister)

I didn't know your husband was a Baptist minister roisin. I owe a debt of gratitude to the Baptists because they saved me from insanity when I had 2 v small children (v close in age) with their fantastic playgroup and nursery! The old dears used to take the babies off my hands and replace them with a cup of tea!

Funny you should say that foxinsocks, there's a baptist church here that does the same - runs a fab toddler group and the mums just turn up, get a lovely welcome, all the toys are set up and cleared away for us, no rotas for crafts or snack or dishes. It's such a rest and a real ministry!

that's exactly what it was like tassis - a real refuge!

I was so grateful I always tried to make sure we supported them whenever we could (though we are not v religious people) - I will always remember their kindness though.