End of my tether with DCs not getting on

[anotherglassofred]

DD(9) and DS (7) have never got on particularly well but it has got worse recently and I am struggling to keep the peace. I cannot leave them in the same room unsupervised as within a few minutes one has hit or upset the other or accuses the other of doing so even if they haven't and the culprit will not own up. The lying is the worse thing and punishments seem to make no difference.

They start arguing or putting each other down seconds after I have picked them up from school and it carries on until bedtime unless one or other has an after school activity. DH has been at home during the day for the last few weeks for the first time ever and cannot believe how they are behaving.

They are very well behaved at school and in company so it is only each other that is the problem.

Any ideas would be great as I have had enough and DH is not really hands on.

I can't offer any advice, I looked at your thread to see if there is any info I could use as I'm in the same position with my DS's, even down to their ages! But if it helps you're not alone in this being an issue, it's like a war-zone, relentless niggling, fighting, argueing and whining, definitely enough to leave me teetering on the edge. I hope your situation improves

Have you tried talking to them about it? What do they say?

Maybe it would help if they got individual attention, maybe from DH.

My mom ran an aftercare for 15 years and for minor squabbles she never attempted to find out who was right and who was wrong, she just punished both. She would make them sit in the corner for a while and then they had to shake hands or kiss each other.