Help - DS2 is 4 and is pooing his pants again....

[Legacy]

He's been trained about a year. Poos always a little bit more difficult, but has mostly been getting there in time (even if not wiping well, IYSWIM ) but over the last 2 weeks he has just regressed - seems to start every poo in his pants.

DH is getting really angry about it and says he is just lazy. He knows he shouldn't do it, but doesn't seem particularly bothered about it, or by us being angry with him. It's hard to get him to answer 'why' very coherently - but today he said "because I was playing".

DH has gone down a 'punishment' route by taking his toys away for each accident, I'm not so sure this is the best way.
He starts school in 6 weeks time, we have to sort this!!

Please tell your husband that punishment will make it worse.
Lots of children regress a bit, especially if they are anxious about something or maybe something has changed.
Maybe he is worrying about suddelnly needing to be a 'big boy' by going to school and is making an unconscious protest, maybe he is eating or drinking different things in this weather?
Can you just remind him gently to think ahead and as soon as he needs to go, go don't wait, but if he has an accident treat it very low key.

poor, poor child. What a horrible way to react

There are medical conditions that cause this problem, particularly if it is small amounts of poo. The child may very well have little control over what is happening, and indeed often may not know he has done it!

You and DH need to ignore it, change him in a very relaxed no fuss way, then let his get on with it.

My ds3 keept on weeing and pooing his pants when he was nearly 3.It seemed to be when he was concentrating. I kept on telling him it didnt matter and next time use the potty, but after one particular bad day i got down to his level asked him to look at me so i knew he was listening and told him enough was enough i was fed up with changing him and i bet he was fed up of having to stop playing so i could change him and he must use the potty. I did say this in an angry voice this worked for him, it just seemed to switch him on. Before telling him it was ok and it didnt matter seemed to give him permission to not use the potty. I wouldnt punnish by taking toys away.

It's a boy thing. Legacy has he been engrossed in a new activity recently?? I can pinpoint accidents here to my two boys being deeply engrossed in a new activity. Don't worry it won't last. All boys regress, and as NettoFabulous said anxiety could be underlying factor. I tend to say oh dear, too late you have to try and remember darling.