Formula fed newborn will not sleep

[Inapickle123]

So anxious.

Baby born yesterday and wouldn't take to BF. Went down FF route because he was so upset and he slept brilliantly in the hospital.

Now at home, he simply will not settle. He's taking enough milk but will not sleep for any longer than 20 minutes, waking up grunting, grizzling, high pitched screams-he seems so unhappy.

He's in a Moses basket and will sleep a little better when held but it's only an extra 10 min or so.

I know its early days but this can't be right-surely, given the amount he's taking (30ml-as advised by MW) he should be out for 3-4 hours. He just won't settle and I don't know what to do.

Checked nappy. Feed. Winded. Checked temperature. Swaddled for bap. We've swaddled (arms in and out), tucked blankets in, hot water bottle in basket before putting him down. He's got a onesie, sleep suit, sheet and cellular blanket on.

Mini cries, squealing, rapid breathing, grunting, occasional cries-we don't run directly to him unless he sounds super distressed but it's really hard because we're naturally anxious that we're doing something wrong and he's clearly uncomfy.

If anyone has any idea as to what is going on, please respond!

Christ, no wonder we have colic.. reflux and god knows what else if people shove oz s of formula into a newborn. Tiny tummys need to be prepared for milk.. They need something like a tablespoon or 2 in a feed in the first couple of days.

Swaddle, cuddle and little and often at this stage. That's all they need.

Reflux and silent reflux are nothing to do with overfeeding. They are physical issues caused by a weakness in the valve at the top of the windpipe / throat.

Whilst I completely and utterly disagree with overfeeding or encouraging a baby to take more formula than they need, reflux is a completely separate issue.

The reason most babies grow out of reflux by about 12 weeks is because the weaker muscle usually strengthens by then and it is no longer an issue.

OP - if I were you I would lower expectations and don't get obsessed with trying different things to find the perfect solution. There really isn't a perfect solution with a 2 day old, just coping strategies.

I was totally routine obsessed when my dcs were babies, all about moses basket, not a fan of cosleeping etc. However even i recognised that in the first few weeks there will be no routine. Both dcs slept almost exclusively on DH for the first week - no chance of sleeping in cots or prams. Needs must. Break the over tired cycle by whatever means necessary. If that means driving around for an hour in the car, letting baby co sleep, slings etc etc.

Hope you have managed a bit of sleep.

Sounds pretty normal newborn behaviour! Mine never took long naps straight away. Now at 3 months my son is finally taking a two hour nap! Usually it's been only ten mins here and there. Thirty if I'm lucky and me holding him, walking him etc. eventually it gets easier

If you are formula feeding anyways, I would strongly recommend you look into trying a hydrolysed formula incase of cow milk protein allergy. You can get this of GP or from over the counter (try a big boots). All the best OP.

Op as others have said - it is completely normal
For behaviour, sleeping pattern Etc to change radically day to day in the first few months - newborn babies often sleep a lot for a day or two when they are born.

Once they wake up from this state they will want to be held and will cry when they are laid down - they don't actually know yet that they are separate to you - they have Ben designed by nature to be happy when they feel and hear you close to them ...

It's also totally normal for them to hardly sleep in the first weeks unfortunately - I think it's bonkers that a midwife would tell you that thy should be sleeping for particular lengths of time

Any chance you could try putting him back on the breast? Possibly formula isn't agreeing with him. And please cuddle him before he gets really distressed, it's not worth it.

He might still be hungry.

It could be perfectly normal baby behaviour or it could not. I really think the OP needs to chat to a real-life healthcare prof, if only to seek reassurance.

He's a day old, just cuddle him!

And lower your expectations a little re sleep Who on earth told you he should be sleeping 3-4 hours when he's a day old?!

He was content in hospital because he'd just popped out! They sleep almost immediately after birth and are normally quite lethargic.

Please, just pick him up - lots and lots - you don't have to put him down in the moses you know!

Enjoy enjoy! Oh and second the poster who said you can try BF again. Either is absolutely fine, but don't feel that you can't bf just because you decided at the hospital that you weren't going to do it if that makes sense.

Sma's website says 90ml over 4 hours as a guide for newborns up to 7.75lbs. Pick him up. Try bf if you want to or give him more formula.

If he wants feeding every 2 hours then he does.

Just pick him up when he cries. And hope for the best this grizzling improves in the next couple of weeks.

Hello. Congratulations!
More than likely you just need to offer formula in demand, hold your baby as much as they need and don't worry too much about routines and bad habits (if you're the type to worry, that is!) for weeks yet.

However, taking five hours to get 40ml doesn't sound right to me (dr). Especially is the baby is distressed or too tired to feed. A number of big changes happen to the heart in the period after birth and the remember some digestive issues are only diagnosed in the first few days and weeks as feeding is established. Please get some help in real life. Get someone who is trained (midwife/hv/gp) to look at your baby to make sure all is well and you just have a (normal) fussy baby.

Agree it may be worth offering the breast as your milk has probably not even come in yet, just colostrum (which has benefits, anyway). If that doesn't feel right to you then absolutely fair enough and your decision, just a thought?

Babies at this age eat every 2 hours max, on average, I think. They have minute tummies and most just can't store enough for longer than that. DS was a 90 min feeder for the first weeks, then 2 until 4 months, then 3 and finally 4 hourly at 6 months. And they want to be cuddled and held - they're used to your womb and not a cradle. DS wouldn't sleep without being cuddled for the first few weeks - what you describe is normal, I think. Bloody hard, though.

I'd call the community midwife for reassurance, but it all sounds very normal for such a tiny little baby to me.

I'm no professional but my Dd slept beautifully on night 1 in the hospital, night 2 however she was an absolute nightmare. She wouldn't be put down without my boob in her mouth...not for 1 second!!! I spoke to the bf counsellor about it the following morning thinking it was something I was doing wrong but she reassured me the second day is when the baby starts with an appetite and is usually unsettled.

I can happily confirm the second night was by far the worst we had so hopefully this will pass for you too.

I also forgot to mention when my dd wasnt interested in feeding on day 1 & 2 I was advised to strip her down, take vest off etc to rouse her?!

My DS was like this. At hospital and first day and night was a dream, all sleepy. I thought "this is easy" and then he woke up and I remember one night where he didn't sleep at all. I think it was night 2. My DD was better, although I spent the first few nights in hospital with her and she spent one night in the night nursery so I could get some sleep. She was 4 days old by the time we came home and she was quite settled from then on.

Both of mine were breastfed but it could be that the formula is not agreeing with him. However, I agree with others. This is unfortunately life with a newborn. I know it's incredibly difficult. You actually just have to try to survive each day. It gets easier. But I am sorry to say, babies are hard work. You never quite appreciate it until it arrives. However, mine are now 3.2 and 8 months old and rest assured it does get easier. It's just time and experience.

Also - agree with someone else who said stripping the baby down if they are sleepy. I did this a lot, particularly with DD. I would also tickle her feet and blow on her face gently. Otherwise she would just fall asleep.

One more thing - I did follow a bit of a routine from day one with DD. I found it to hard with my first (my DS). I followed Tizzie Hall, Save our Sleep. However, I tried this with my son and it was too hard because I didn't have a clue what I was doing. So I would suggest go with the flow as best you can. Can you take him out in the pram at all? That worked a treat for my son.

How are you getting on now op?

My DD was the same, I used to spend 2 hours drip feeding her and trying to keep her awake. If I had my time again I'd have fed her what she wanted, then more later, little and often. She used to fall asleep on us. It was lovely.

Don't worry about the long term, by the time she was 1 she'd guzzle a bottle and only sleep in her own bed. She thinks it's play time if we're around. You can't force feed a baby, they just bring it up if you do!

Also, if he does finish, don't be afraid to give him more. It'll even itself out. Hungry crying is the worst.

Thanks for all the replies. It's been a very fraught few days.

Midwife thinks that he doesn't have a clear suck reflex, meaning he can't take a full feed (he was small so "needs" 60ml per feed now)-it's taking 45Min to an hour to get 30ml in him, forcing him all the way. That, coupled with a "digestive issue" (she wouldn't specify but has constant trapped wind) means they want him back to hospital to monitor him for a few days.

He's sleeping a bit during the day but is up from 12-7am every night as he seems to reach the peak of his discomfort then. Lots of squirming, clenching, squeezing, crying, wailing, "blue" face, grunting, wheezing, groaning etc. we tried infacol but it hasn't even touched the problem.

It's horrible to see him so unhappy but I'm hopeful that once we're admitted tomorrow or Thursday, we'll get to the bottom of it.

If anything, at least me instincts are right. Thanks for the advice and support-it is very much appreciated.

Oh, the poor little thing. Instincts are there for a reason, well done for listening to them.

Wishing him and you all the best.

So glad you got someone to see him in real life.

I'm so glad you were able to get someone to see him

So glad you got seen, and well done on your first major parenting triumph - trusting your instincts.

It sounds like your midwife is on the ball, which is great. I hope you get the support you need in hospital, and that you can get some sleep. Maybe the midwives will take him for a few hours to allow you to get your head down as no doubt you'll be on the edge of reason by now .

well done OP , let us know how it goes.

(((gentle hugs))) for baby