Day 1 of holidays and its all going Pete Tong

[glassofwine]

DD1 age 7 is being good, but DD2 age 4 1/2 and DS1 age 3 1/2 are driving me crazy. The three of them trashed the living room this morning, but were quite good about tidying it up later on. DS is whinging non stop, they start a game really nicely, but within a short time it turns into screaming, shouting and hurting each other. Everything I ask them to do is either ignored or they say no. Then they trashed DS's bedroom while I was putting clothes away and they are prevaracting about tidying it up.

I know some people don't expect their children to tidy their own mess, but I do if its a huge mess. I think they should learn that I am not a servant, but today it's driving me mad. Their bedrooms really need a good sort out and the truth is that I'm just not in the mood to do it.

I had hoped that the holidays would be a nice mix of trips out, activities done together and a bit of time when they'd play without always needing me ot supervise. Now I'm thinking that I'm going to have to be involved in every game or activity or it'll be a nightmare for the rest of the holidays.

Have sent the two younger ones to their rooms, so better go and talk to them as it's been more like 10 mins then 4!

it's hard work! try to get them into a routine of tidying up after themselves is great if you can manage it! i have two boys (12 and 5) and they try, but mostly fight each other argh

go out
why are you sitting at home
go out int he ornign imo adn then relax int he afernoon
haev you not a paddlign pool?

I agree with 'ocd' [sic] ROFL!

I know it's a huge effort but when my boys were a little younger I had to arrange an outing first thing every morning - often brief, frequently free: a walk to the park, or the local swings, or a little bikeride or whatever. We all benefitted from the fresh air and exercise.
Then when we got home I set out clear rules/expectations for behaviour, with a promise of a 'treat' if they did well for the day. (Maybe a lolly from the freezer at 3 pm or something.)
I also made an effort to praise/reward good behaviour by about 3.30, as my children usually turn into demons from hell at about 4 pm, no matter how good the day has been!

HTH.

And on a positive note they are now 7 and 9, and life is so much easier now. We don't have to stick to a routine, insist they get up, dressed, breakfast etc. But when they are little they do need routines, and some really struggle with a switch to informality and flexibil meals!

Cod - we do have a paddling pool, but also a hose pipe ban. They said they wanted to stay at home today, which is why we've stayed in, but have now just decided to go out, so they are putting shoes on etc now.

I guess I was hoping that this would be our first summer without routine etc perhaps I was getting ahead of myself.

Try to chill about the mess, its NEVER going to be tidy in the holidays, I have just done my room and the bathroom and kicked the kids stuff in thier room and shut the door so i cant see it
In a week or so I will spend a few hours helping them sort it out but it doesnt last long enough to stress about it.

glassofwine,

we are also under a hosepipe ban but the way I unerstand it is that it is ok to fill up a paddling pool with a hosepipe (we are under thames water and their website says it is ok)
Sorry a little bit off the point but I hate to think of anyone depriving themselves of their paddling pools in this heat....
Am also having a bad day with dds (2.8 and 5), the whole house is trashed ,but I am looking forward to a large glass of essential Pimms once they are in bed

agree re mess
try the " pick three thigns up that dont belong downstairs" routine

ro put on a song htey liek and run around putting htings into a big box to go upstiars

set up soem rules of things they have to do ( lear the table woudl eb one - pick up clothes they reomve - make a bed etc)

also agree ona tiem out for everyone - ours is an hour/ or les mayeb afetr lunch where they can watch tv go ont eh pc or wheveer so you all get a break

the music thing - we did tow 3 minute songs stunned the kids

they noticed that of us tidied up for 6 minutes that normally woudlhave been me ( and or dh) for 30 odd

You're all right, I think I had an over romantic idea of the holidays. DH is off for a week now, but will start afresh after that.

Oh glassofwine, as a person who hates mess i can symperthisy (but cant spell) with you.
I have 2 boys age 10 and almost 6 and if put in a room together will kill each other, but i love and long for the school holidays, we broke up tuesday and the first thing we did tuesday afternoon was go get the new school uniform so thats out of the way,
We have been to the park and today we made cakes.
We are lucky enought to be going to cornwall later in the hols nad boys will be going to devon with dh also, but as for the day to day i try to do one "big " outing a week where we go to thorpe park, the zoo ect, the rest of the time its free things (living near london helps a bit) also we have a box full of art things for rainy days. As for the mess i had a big clear up just before the holidays started and will have another one when school starts again and in the mean time as long as we have clean undies and plates the rest can wait, (and beleive me i have ocd so mess is an issue for me)but i look at it that my children are growing fast and i dont want there summer holiday memories to be of mommy being too busy cleaning to play. (Something eldast said about 4 years ago drove this home). If i really cant cope with the mess i have a clear up when they go to bed or are with dh.
Enjoy your summer.