How do I get my ds (2.5) to get out of bed for a wee in the morning?

[Olihan]

This may seem like a slightly strange problem, none of my rl mum friends have children who do this so I'm hoping someone on here does or has an inspired solution!

My ds who is 2.5 potty trained about 6 - 7 weeks ago. From the first day in pants he was dry at night so after a couple of weeks I bit the bullet and let him go nappyless overnight too. So far, so good. I can count the number of accidents in the middle of the night on one hand but............

he will NOT get out of bed and have a wee when he wakes up in the morning.

He's been in a bed since he was 14 months and he has only got out of his own free will maybe 4 or five times. He never gets out when he first goes to bed, he never gets out when he wakes up from his nap and he never gets out in the middle of the night or in the morning. I have told him to get up and play with the toys in his room, I've told him to come to our room but he won't get out until dh or I go into his room and fetch him. He will stay in bed, awake, for over an hour if we don't go in.

The potty is right next to his bed and he knows it's there but I'm getting really frustrated with him wetting in the morning because he won't get up.

Surely, with all the experience on MN, someone can help me to get him out and onto the potty?

This will probably work but I will get shouted down and you will all think I am awful.

For 3 or 4 mornings in a row, give him a chocolate penny when you get him out to have a wee. Then refuse to produce the penny until he gets out himself!

What time does he wake up? Are you awake then as well? I am a bit confused about why you can't get up and help him go on the potty. He is quite little really, isn't he? He's probably half asleep still and it sounds like he might be scared of getting out of bed by himself.

Was thinking of outright bribery, Colditz, if nothing else works!!

Franny, I'm usually awake when he wakes up and at the moment I do go down and get him up and on the potty. It's if he wakes up and I'm in the shower or don't hear him, or if I've had a rough night with dd who's 11 months and I can't drag myself out of bed . He honestly isn't scared of getting out of bed, or half asleep. He just lies in bed and chats to his toys, or fishes out a toy that he's stashed down the side of his bed and plays with that.

Before he was potty trained I used to lie and listen to him having these gorgeous little nonsense chats with himself, he was really funny and if you heard him you'd know there was no way he was worried about anything. During the day he takes himself off and uses the toilet or potty totally independently, usually not telling me until after he's been.

It's just the getting out of bed he won't do

I would put him back in a nappy at night time, then. It's not a big deal, is it? He can lie in bed and be cosy and have a wee in his nappy in the morning. He'll get there when he's ready and meanwhile it doesn't matter.

Yup, tried that, he takes the nappy off when he wakes up . Little monkey.

I probably should have made it clearer in my OP, if he got up and weed of his own accord then I could have a few extra minutes in bed/shower in peace because I am a lazy (pregnant) old trout .

I know he is really little still, the trouble is, he's very, very tall for his age and very verbal. I've had people asking me if he's going to school in September and I think I do forget he's still a baby really.

I just don't get why every other parent I know is tearing their hair out over kids who won't stay in bed and I'm struggling to get mine out!! I should count my blessings really, I know. I just don't want any more wet sheets because I haven't got to him quickly enough

I think you should definitely be able to lie in bed for a few more minutes

Probably worth trying a bribe for, then

I would only do it if you are pretty positive it is going to work, though. Gets awfully complicated and messy if he is too young to really understand the bribe. How about a pull up nappy? Can he take those off?

Unfortunately, he realsied how to take the pull ups off once he learned how to take his pants down!!

TBH, I know it's not that much of a hardship to get up to him straightaway, I'd just like to know that he will get up, wee, and play for a bit then come and find us when he's ready so I don't have to go flying in the second I hear him!!

He's never been that bothered by bribery with stickers etc in the past. Chocolate he is keen on though but I'd rather use that as a last resort.

At this age they have all sorts of weird imaginings - monsters under the bed, crocodiles in the potty, etc etc. Are you sure there is not something he worries about, that he feels is too silly to tell you?

Mine refused for ages to go upstairs alone to get their pjs on at night, to my great frustration, only to find that they were convinced that 'something' would get them if they went up alone! They are good bit older than your DS though

I'd start by going in, opening the curtains and saying, up we get, wee in potty. Then gradually withdraw a bit so that it becomes standing at the door, wee in potty, then stand in your bedroom doorway and say, wee in potty, then shout from the bathroom, wee in potty, then finally yell from your bed! Hopefully by then he will overcome whatever is stopping him from performing