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Parenting

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Original poster

How do you cope with two children?

8 replies

magicballs · 07/01/2014 14:48

Hello all, I wasn't sure whether to post here or chat, hopefully this is a good place to get some parenting advice.
I currently have a toddler DD (2), and I also work full time. DH & I are now contemplating having another DC (if we even can, fertility issues), hopefully when my DD is 3 and going to pre-school. The thing that really worries me is I will have to go back to work when my DC is 6 months and how do other mums and dads cope with having two children and getting them up and ready for the day? Is it really difficult?! I think my problem is I'm not naturally very organised so is that something I would have to learn?
My current day is this: Up at 6am, shower and dress. Get DD up at 7am, dress her, milk, make breakfast. I leave the house at 7.30am, DD is looked after nanny but will be going to pre-school at 3 as I said.
Is it just insane having the morning routine and getting two DC dressed and breakfasted and organised for the day? Fortunately my DD is a wonderful sleeper, but what if DC2 is a terrible sleeper, when do mums find the time to get ready for work?
I know this all sounds daft but I'm actually worried and its one of the main reasons I am delaying having a child, that and I desperately don't want it to affect my job which I am trying to further.

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ISeeYouShiverWithAntici · 07/01/2014 14:49

I've got 2. There's 15 months between them.

tbh, it really hasn't been all that different to having 1.

I hear that it's having 3 that it hits you

annieorangutan · 07/01/2014 14:52

If your used to working then you already have the skills to do it. It is a whole different kettle of fish working with kids to not but it can be done. In a way its easier the smaller they are as you can bung their clothes on stick them in the buggy and go.

Original poster

magicballs · 07/01/2014 14:56

Thing is, I am actually quite organised at work - I get the work done and I prioritise. I think I'm just panicking and feeling daft because its a big decision and I don't want to feel like I'm drowning! Obviously my DH would be there to help me but he works very long hours which is why I do the majority of the morning routine. I can see why 3 would be manic, hopefully the next DC won't be twins

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Clutterbugsmum · 07/01/2014 15:13

Badly. I really struggled going from one to two. It may have been because dd1 started nursery a week after dd2 was born or because dd2 was a very screamy baby.

But it was a piece of cake going from two to three children. The only difference was that there is only 18mths between them and ds was a dream baby.

Original poster

magicballs · 07/01/2014 15:19

Clutterbugsmum oh no now I am worried!
My DD was a real screamy, collicky, refluxy baby who would scream from 6pm - 6am, I was so tired and down the first three months. This is my actual fear, what if DC2 is the same, how will I cope on no sleep AND getting DD up and being cooperative! But you all sound like you coped marvelously

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Middleagedmotheroftwo · 07/01/2014 15:19

Not very helpful, but I think you just do. I have 18 mths between my two DDs, so after the first 18 mths, they were able to do pretty much the same kind of thing at the same time, so that made things easier. I think it must be very difficult entertaining a 5 year old and a 1 year old without one of them getting bored.

I'm sure you'll be fine. Just remember, it doesn't really matter if your house goes to shit!

DIYandEatCake · 07/01/2014 16:10

Don't forget that your dd will get more able and self sufficient as she gets older. I have a 2.10yo and a 4 week old and have been quite pleasantly surprised that's it's not as impossible to get up and organised as I imagined - I'm not at work at the moment of course, but dd dresses herself while I shower and ds sits in his bouncy chair in the bathroom, for example. I don't know how it will be when des gets to 6mo, but at 3 your dd will need less help than she does now. I'd go for it - it might be a few months of hell, but in the greater scheme of things it will be worth it if you want another child.

Eletheomel · 07/01/2014 20:21

I'm lucky I get my DH to do the morning prep .

My morning routine is up at 6:12, shower, dress, no bfast (have that at work) and out the door at 6:50am to get the bus to work.

DH starts work later than me and drives so he gets DS1 (just turned 5 - DS2 is 7 months) ready for dropping off at childminder at 8am. He has confessed to being worried getting them both ready but he'll be fine, as DS1 more or less gets himself sorted in the mornings these days.

DS1 was a poor sleeper, DS2 started off good but has gone downhill of late... (in my experience though you just cope with lack of sleep - you get used to it).

Friends of ours with 3 kids used to do a lot of prep the night before (lay table for bfast, get all school/nursery bags packed and ready, clothes laid out etc) so there was no 'seeking' for things in the morning.

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