Going Back To Work Full Time Dilemma... baby will be 9 months old

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Hi Everyone,

I will be going back to work in around 7 months or so and my little girl will be just over 9 months old. I am having to go back to work full time and while i'm working LO will be taken care of during the day by her nan.

I am already experiencing incredible guilt over having to return to work full time (there is a financial need) because I will be away from my beautiful little girl & i'm terrified of missing out on her and as a consequence not being a close to her as I want to be.

I absolutely love my job and have worked very hard to get to the senior position i'm in today and am desperately trying to work out in my head ways of making it work and getting a good balance with work and my darling little girl.

I keep holding on to the fact that i'll be with her for her morning routine and evening routine and all weekend and will absolutely have to make every minute i'm with her count. Also, i'm trying to secure her future by saving for her, buying a house for us so we have roots and I want to be able to take her away on holidays etc, all of which we wouldn't be able to do if I don't go back full time.

If anyone has any experiences they can share with me about how they made full time working work with having a baby, I'd be really grateful. I'm in quite a state about it.

thanks so much for listening and in advance for experience sharing. x

Just echoing what others have said - it's really early days and you'll probably feel different when the time comes. It sounds like you've got support sorted, I'm sure you'll be fine.

Working full time just means you have to be super organised - make the lunches etc the night before, batch cook when you can to help for nights when you're working or can't be bothered etc. I find that i spend 10-15 minutes when i get home scooting around the house getting washing in the machine, loading dishwasher etc .

I work full time hours in 4 days, so I always have Fridays off with my DC. My husband has also organised flexible working so that he's off with her on Mondays. Is flexi working an option for you too?

When the time comes it's bound to be emotional. But my advice is to try your hardest to put it tp the back of your mind and enjoy every moment of your mat leave. I know exactly how you feel.

I went back ft when ds was 9 months too, although it helped that I applied for flexible working and initially worked from home 2 days a week. I now work slightly reduced hours to give me more time with my ds (now 3) in the evenings. It has helped that he has a lovely cm who he is very fond of and vice versa. So the fact that your dd will be cared for by someone so close will be a massive weight off your mind.

Ds is sociable, confident, happy and we enjoy an exceptionally close bond. Every moment we spend together is precious. My advice when you go back is to always have some leave booked that you can look forward to and if possible spread it out through the year so you never go too long without some family time together, even if you don't go away anywhere. And it's all about preparation and planning ahead so that you make the most of the time available to you. You will have ups and downs and little wobbles occasionally but you are not harming your dd. You are also giving her a positive role model to look up to.

Went to work both times when the baby was 9 monts old and sent them to nursery (no local grandparents and also personally preferred nursery over all other options) - ave two very happy loving children and no regrets.