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Parenting

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Original poster

We are moving and DS (2.8) is a bit thrown, any advice?

11 replies

Pruni · 20/07/2006 10:02

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MissChief · 20/07/2006 10:10

hi pruni!
when we last moved (as you know, we're going to again), ds was about the same age and if it's any consolation he now seems to have no memory at all of people/places etc from before the age of about 3.5 or so that should help in terms of him settling down in the long-term.
We hid a much-wanted toy (can't remember what now - cuddly toy or duplo set i think) in the new house for him to find so his first experience there was a happy one. tother than that, i suppose building up what he's going to there seeing more of gps etc.

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Pruni · 20/07/2006 10:13

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MissChief · 20/07/2006 10:25

oh IKYWM, pruni - i'm gutted to be leaving people here and feel so bad for taking ds away from friends..but also v excited about move and find living where we are now on the whole too stressful so i know it's for the best.

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wanderingstar · 20/07/2006 17:40

Make him a little scrap book - old home, a lovely (!) photo of the removal lorry, some favourite old haunts, then some pics of new bedroom, new local park etc, Daddy and mummy in new home, and so on. Put in a simple storyline too. My ds1 is 12 now, but we moved when he was the same age as your ds, and was upset. he loved the scrapbook: I think we still have it somewhere !

GeorginaA · 20/07/2006 17:44

We moved when ds1 was a similar age, Pruni.

One thing we did was I went to stay with my mum a couple of days so that ds1 didn't see his room being packed up, and when we arrived at the new house, dh had already set up ds1's room all ready for him, so he had his familiar things around him immediately and there wasn't too much upheaval.

apronstrings · 20/07/2006 17:50

when we moved in the uk we did the same sort of thing as Georgina - in fact we all stayed over at granny's early am dh and I left to meet van at new house got all the children's rooms seet up (nothing much else)and Granny and g'dad bought the children to new house late afternoon. We have serially moved (including to the states) each time a favourite toy/ the best teddy has travelled ewith each of the children in a rucksack that they look after - I think it has helped reassure them that things will be the same.

Good Luck with it - it can be very sad - next year we will return to the uk from usa and I'm already getting anxious - but thats another thread

MissChief · 21/07/2006 09:40

oh what a lovley idea! Must make time for this too for our ds - now 5 and his 2nd move in his little life

good luck with it, Pruni!

BettySpaghetti · 21/07/2006 10:06

Is there a chance that he doesn't realise that all of his belongings will be coming with him to the new house -you know how childrens minds work!

When we moved DD was almost 2. We talked a lot beforehand about moving, how we would still see our old friends and neighbours but how we'd also see new ones. She visited the new house with us so knew where we were all going (rather than a "faceless" place).

On the day of the move we drafted in my mum to come and look after her as we directed removal men/unpacked. What worked really well was DD unpacking some of her things and deciding where to put them (although it was more of a case of dumping them in various corners of the new room! but it was her contribution and she was making her space/territory)

shimmy21 · 21/07/2006 10:32

Hi Pruni we moved when ds was exactly the same age as yours and I do believe that the repercussions were actually a lot deeper than I gave him credit for at the time. Ds also left a beloved childmnder and group of friends. Tbh honest I was so wrapped up in the move (and new baby) that I didn't think through the effcts on ds nearly as well as you are.

One tip we followed was to sort ds's bedroom on moving day before anything else so he had the same bed, toys, even posters on the wall in more or less the same position as his old room when everything else was still in chaos. it did really help for him to have sanctuary.

The other tip - be prepared for some retrograde steps. Ds was well on the way to being potty trained and went right back to square one after the move.

Good luck!

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Pruni · 21/07/2006 14:44

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Jbck · 21/07/2006 22:05

We're moving in October but Dd starts school in August & she'll be starting in the area we're moving too, about 20 miles from here so as not to upset her twice iyswim. She's 4.5 but also had in her head that the new girl, couple buying have a daughter the same age, would be playing with DD's toys & sleeping in her bed etc so I've concentrated on what we'll take & how exciting it'll be to have a new room. Because we haven't decorated her room any older yet here, she's getting all new big girl bedding & stuff to make it more special.
Only problem is we haven't bought anywhere yet cos we're sooo picky.
I'm sure she'll love her new tent in the local field!
Good luck.

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