Am i a nag or providing consistent discipline?

[IcouldstillbeJoseph]

DS is very nearly 3. Sometimes I get to the end of the day and feel like I have just constantly said the same things, over and over all day.

At the moment they are "take your fingers out of your mouth please" (mainly whilst sat on the toilet, bleurgh), "be careful of your sister please", "we don't say 'I want' it's 'please may I have...'" and "it's not 'uh?' It's 'pardon'" .....you get the general idea.

Obviously I praise him too but it's very wearing. Do you think I'm nagging or providing a consistent message?

I was told that nagging is simply a repetition of the truth.

Consistent message. As long as you praise him loads when he does things without being asked/first time you ask etc then you'll get there in the end. I would say though, that for your sanity at this age pick your battles. Only remind about the things that you feel HAVE to be adhered to at this age. He's still little, and there's so much going on that he'll have a hard time remembering if you expect him to have too many rules. You have my sympathies, but it does pass! (When they hit 21 apparently;) )

What QTpie said!!

How else will he learn without some gentle brainwashing? I found it's when you open your mouth to reproach strangers or adults you know things get tricky .

I have done that so many times...

I think the handwashing/hygiene stuff can be safely done without - home germs are only yours anyway. For instance why does it matter if he sucks his fingers while he's on the toilet? Agree with Attack (I love C&H, btw!) - pick your battles.

Zuleika - are you serious on the 'home germs' thing?

I'm generally left feeling like a grubby hippy on lots of mn threads (wash towels once a week, use vinegar and bicarb instead of antibacterials, don't fret too much about PFB's taste for eating park greenery)... But handwashing on the loo and before eating really matters, faecal matter can make you sick no matter whether they are 'home germs' or not, and toddlers pick up so many bugs at daycare and playgroups that it's only sensible to try to minimise potential D&V spread (as you are contagious days before you show signs, and even if you only wee-d, the person before you may well not have).

Anyway, rant over, sorry for hijacking and YANBU!

We've never washed hands before eating (though obv always after anything involving poo) in the entire family and we're all healthy as horses. Urine is sterile (and in fact can be a cleaning agent) so you really don't need to worry about that.

yes urine is sterile but toilet seats aren't.

Some things are not worth repeating because the child is not going to learn them yet, (and listening to someone repeating themselves is annoying for everyone). Some things need to be drummed into children's heads.

It gets more serious when it comes to "Don't take Ecstasy" and "Don't have unprotected sex". I think knowing how and when you can find a teachable moment with a particular child is one of the most difficult and important things about being a parent.

I was very fed up of people saying "What do you say?" in an annoying voice CONSTANTLY to tiny children, when all that was needed was to model "Please" and "Thank you" and they would learn just as fast (sometimes faster). I know I am in a minority in feeling this way.

:shrug: Toilet gets cleaned every day, obviously, so I don't think it can be that bad.

I think you have to pick your battles.

But once you've picked them, yes there is still a lot of repetition.