Feel like I'm letting Ds down.

[EnglishGirlApproximately]

I just feel like a rubbish mum at the moment. After my maternity leave finished I found a part time job that I really loved. Unfortunately Dp got made redundant with no pay off and I panicked and took a full time job in my old career as I was so worried about making ends meet.
I've been full time for 3 months and I feel like its damaging my relationship with Ds. I leave the house at 7.30 and get home at 6.30 so only get about an hour a day with him and that's taken up with breakfast, bath etc. On my days off I'm so knackered I can barely function and I'm increasingly relying on TV to fill the time.

How do I become a fun mum again?Where do I get the energy? Dp got a job quite quickly so could go back part time but can't see anything available at the moment. Me and DP both week in jobs where we don't have a set rota so rarely get days off together. I would look for an evening job but Dp doesn't get in until 8 so I would struggle with that too. I need to find a way to make this work but I don't know where to start.

I just want to be a good mum again, have fun and go out.

Bumping. Hoping for advice :)

Can you submit a flexible working request for your current job?

I work 32 office hours and five evening at home hours a week. It is tiring but I do get three full days a week with Ds which are incredibly important.

Not really. I'm the manager of a shop so I really can only work when the shop is open. I've considered compressed hours but can't see how it would work for the same reason. I can't extend my current day any more and there really aren't many jobs I could take home.

I have considered asking about going part time as I have two competent assistant managers and a supervisor but the company I work for isn't very forward thinking and I'm certain they would say no.

I'd put it to them to go part time or lose you.

You are doing a great job, breakfasts and bathtime with him are great, less than your use to but can still be enjoyable.

As your OH is also working can you afford a cleaner, etc so your days off can really be spent with the baby doing nice things?

Could he have a longer nap in the day so you eveing time isn't so rushed?

A friend of mine has just negotiated an extra 4weeks leave a year. Great solution for her. Worth a try. And yes yes get a cleaner.

Thanks for your replies. I have thought about a cleaner but not done anything about it so will definitely look into it. Dp does a lot of the housework and I try to do as much as I can when Ds is in bed so it doesn't eat into my time with him.

I would love to put him to bed a bit later so we get a better evening but he likes to be put down at 7.15 or he doesn't sleep well, regardless of how long his nap is.

Interesting idea about extra leave and nt something

Oops. Not something I've thought of. I could even take unpaid leave if I budgeted for it and it would mean no more long stretches without some quality time with Ds.