Through the ceiling. MMOB? Wwyd?

[Expectans]

Baby is due in a month, and have recently moved into a block of flats. Have yet to meet many neighbours, apart from occasionally in the lift, but those I have seem friendly enough.

Except, I can hear a woman shouting. I am not usually here during the day, but I have heard her at various times, including in the middle of the night, at 6am etc. For the last couple of days have been able to hear her child as well. She has been shouting things like 'I hate you you BASTARD. Shut up. Why don't you just die. Leave me alone' etc. I am ashamed to admit that until I heard the child being shouted at and crying inconsolably I had not thought to do anything. But now...

The problem is I cannot work out exactly where they are in relation to me, so it is not like I could tell some one where to go. Should I just wait til the Health Visitor visit us post baby? It might be nothing, but I think they need help of some kind. She sounds so angry and frustrated and sad... and the poor baby. :(

Am I just a nosy neighbour?

You're not a nosy neighbour, you're a responsible adult who knows about a child (and family) who are in trouble. I'm a big believer that community is important, precisely to protect vulnerable people at difficult times.

Google your local social services team, call them and tell them. They can work out who the family is then speak to them to help work it out.

Waiting until after your baby is born may be too late . Sounds like she's at the end of her rope, whoever she is.

Do as Vatta suggests. Local SS may well already know about the family anyway but unlike you they're not able to hear what's going on when they're not visiting and being offered tea and biscuits by a scared mother on her best behaviour.

Definitely phone ss. You'd never forgive yourself if you leave that poor child being abused.

Make a recording if it's loud enough. Write down when it's happening and what's said each time if you can. And note down any names you hear.
The whole family needs urgent help but that child needs protecting now.

Ok. Thank you for your answers. I will try and record and note as you suggest, and call first thing on Monday.I hope they will be findable.

Just wanted to add that we actually had a very similar situation. You might find that other neighbours will be able to help 'pinpoint' where she is, even if they haven't been getting involved to this point. When I heard the neighbour in our situation seeming to really let go (had never heard anything like it before, similar to what you posted) I went out into the corridor trying to work out what was going on and found another neighbour who could also hear it. Fortunately for me the other neighbour was acquainted with her due to living closer to her, so she knew where to go and spoke to her. The mum broke down into tears and confessed that she felt everything was very hard on her - a lot was going wrong in her life and she knew it wasn't her child's fault, but she would just lose control of her emotions really easily. The other neighbour helped to put her in touch with local services to get support.

I was actually moving out of that building at the time so I don't know what happened after but it was certainly a good start for the mum and her child, even if you don't know exactly where it is I think any effort you make would be good work towards helping them.

Agree with everyone. I keep thinking about that poor child crying inconsolably and being screamed at. And the poor mother must be in a really bad way. I would have to do something and I wish we lived in a way that meant we could reach out to each other too. Please try to help them - before I had a baby I didn't really know what it meant to have a child crying for and you and in front of you.

I reported on Monday. Shouting continues, but hopefully someone is gearing up to Do Something.

Well done Expectans, you've done a really good thing. I feel so sorry for that little child I wish there was a way to reach out to the mother and say - please take this without judgement or condemnation, but you're not OK, please accept some help.

What did SS say?

Well done.

Don't forget you can always phone the non emergency police line if you are worried about the child's immediate safety.

Doesn't sound like a great neighbour for you either

They did not say much really, just an acknowledgement, but have my details in case they want to get in touch. Not that there is anything else I can tell them anyway.

All now quiet and calm. Sign of things to come I hope!