GIna devotees only - how & when didyou start trying to put baby in a routine?

[bodenbetty]

I don't want to start anything contentious - just windering how to go about starting teh whole routine thing. DD is only 10 days so probably a little young just yet but am trying to think ahead. her idea of night & mine don't coincide but have stared feeding her in the dark from 7pm on hoping she will get teh message!

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She's a baby. She's ten days old. All she needs is milk, love, cuddles, clean nappies, and sleep. Why shouldn't she have those things when she needs them, rather than when some book says she should need them? I really don't get it.

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no, me neither WWB, tbh. I think the answer is in your post - you are thinking about the baby's needs, not trying to control the baby, which always seemed the natural (in fact the only) thing to do.

But I am enjoying her honestly I am i couldn't love her or want to be with her any more than I do - I only wanted to know what other peoples experiences were of teh whole routine thing, as someone who has been organised & routine driven all her life. (yes that probaly does make me an anal Gina type person.) PLEASE don;t think that I am hung up on allthis it was only to get ideas of how it has worked for other people & their experiences.
(Is there a 'puts head back below parapet' emoticon?)

bodenbetty

dont feel like you have to defend yourself hun. anyone who is suggesting you cant love and enjoy your baby with GF routines is stereotyping, true maybe some dont, but i did/am with both of mine and know many mothers who are the same.

As a GF mum you will have to accept that folk will think you are cruel, your baby is neglected and much more, i have been called half a mother before (in RL) because i had to use a routine to cope with my DD1, i have read articles refering to mothers like myself as BRUTAL and SAVAGE and oh so much more...i am not going to depress you by continuing, on the same breathe there are also many happy happy parents and babies that had terrific success with her books. IME with my two children, if you take the routines as a guideline to begin with, read it properly, dont worry if there are days when the routine goes out the window (dont we all have days that dont go to plan?), and dont worry what others think...you will get on fine.

now i am off this thread but bodenbetty feel free to email me at anytime [email protected]

Have glanced through this thread and IMO I think the MOST important thing you can do with a new baby is just enjoy being together. Routines can fit when the time is good and ready, whether that is sooner or later will depend on the baby. But trust me, they are babies for such a short amount of time, please try and enjoy it as much as possible without stressing about things that honestly don't need stressing about yet. Make the most of your new baby, trust me, it's over before you know it.

at 10 day old babe in any sort of routine.

bodenbetty (great nickname btw!), I remember asking the same question when dd1 was 10 days old, and the midwife looking at me with pity, and saying "she's still a very young baby, you know." Well, dd1 never did take to routines! But she was a very contented baby in her routineless fashion.

My answer would be, when you try a routine, and your baby falls easily into it, different for different babies. Not worth stressing over though.

By the way, it helps to give them the idea of night if you lie down next to them and snore loudly - but thats probably not very Gina either!

Hi - sorry, haven't read the whole thread, but we tried CLB routine for ds1 when he was about 2 weeks and it was a bit early, but we'd got him into it by about 4 weeks old. Loved it - didn't follow it to the letter (i.e. no toast and tea at 8am!!), but certainly the nap times slotted in perfectly.

Mind you, I was really stressed about how to get ds2 into it when it seemed impossible to follow GF with a toddler around the place, but even without the book he also got into a very similar routine. So I think it was about spotting when they're flagging before they get hysterically tired, and being consistent about nap times etc.etc...

bodenbetty - I don't think you're hung up on it at all I think we forget how bloody hard the first few weeks are, but I vividly remember both ds's being 10 - 14 days old and each day felt like a year to live through... We were desperate for routine if that meant sleep! Good luck and I hope the next few weeks pass by quickly for you - the light at the end of the tunnel started to glimmer at about 6 weeks for us!

Agree with Fisfullofnappies.
I tried a GF routine for DD from 9 weeks until she was 6 months old (she's now 14 months).
It never worked for her.
I spent rather too long fretting over why it wasn't working and what I was doing wrong and feeling generally down about it all.
When I should have been going with the flow and enjoying her.
I only relaxed when I accepted that she wasn't going to be 'moulded' into a routine for my benefit.
I'm not saying that routines don't work for some babies and that some babies are happier on a routine, but for us it didn't work and I feel sad that I was beating myself up over it.
I won't do that next time.
I think your personality type also contributes to how you are likely to feel about it.
I'm generally organised, a bit of a control freak and a bit obsessional. I've always had a belief that for most problems if you study hard enough you will come up with the answer. I've realised that where kids are concerned this absolutely doesn't apply.
"Derrrr!" I can hear the chorus now!

Bodenbetty - nothing much new to say except that I fully agree with Happybebe! Nearly nine weeks in and DS2 has definitely got a routine, as a mixture of Gina and fitting in with DS1's routine, and allowing for the fact that he's feeding a bit more in the heat. He has slept through for the past five nights and I feel like a new woman!!!!
Good luck, and hope it all drops into place for you (and keep smiling!)

Hi Bodenbetty
We started our own version of GF when DS was about 6 weeks old, and he slotted almost straight into it. I think we maybe could have done it a week or 10 days earlier, but not much before that.

Sympathies- the first few weeks are REALLY tough arent they, and must be doubly so with an older child. Good luck

Did GF for night-time only when ds was 6.5 weeks old. First night a nightmare, but second night was a breeze. That said it did take a couple of weeks of being totally consistent with it for him to totally accept it and not whimper a word of protest.
Once he was settled with that I then tried sorting out his days. That was much harder and with hindsight I wished I'd done the whole GF thing in one go. (Though did immediately take to the feeding routine - have a few friends who found that the easiest part of GF too). He wasn't fully GFd until 5 months and then it took another month of being totally consistent for it to become easy-peasy.
But I did then reap the rewards of doing it for the next couple of years and ds was much easier to read once he was in a routine (never got the hang of Tracy Hogg's key to different types of crys) and ds still sleeps really well at night.
Found the idea of routines far too demanding when a friend first told me about GF and ds a very demanding newborn, but I'm a total convert now. Dh loved them too because he knew exactly what was expected of him when he took over the babycare for the odd few hours / morning / evening etc. and I think it helped them "bond".

What on earth do you mean yomellamoHelly? "..it did take a couple of weeks of being totally consistent with it for him to totally accept it and not whimper a word of protest."

it means he gave up crying eventually...

It means his spirit was successfully broken. Hmmm.

Nice first lesson to teach your child. "No matter how much you cry no one will come".

it worked for her didn't it

leave her alone. jesus

Yeah. It worked for her. Never mind the baby.