What's your wind down/bedtime routine? (I have just 3yo&18mo)

[littleraysofsunshine]

We do dinner, bath, stories, quiet time on mummy and daddy's bed, or sometimes all watch a DVD together, they then usually fall asleep.

On the nights they don't go down as easy it sometimes gets stressy as they seem irritated. What things do you do for bedtime?

Does your toddler settle in their room? In their bed? Or snuggle with you first? Do you do stories? DVD? Sing lullabies? What about a time?

At that age we did bath,stories (about 3 or 4) then bed,with the same lullaby CD on every night.All done together as they shared a room.

And always same time, upstairs for bath at 7 ishlight off between 8-8.30 which was later than most friends but late bed meant reasonable getting up time.Eldest went into a bed aged 3 which made it a bit harder and used to play up a bit resisting bed time!

Bath....own bed....story....snuggles....lullabys on....lights off....

Dinner
Bath ( or just teeth if not bath day)
Toilet
X2 stories
Bed

They settle alone, in own beds, with door open a fraction.

I have 3 and 1 yo - always been the same routine.

5.30 - dinner
6pm - bath (stories in bath because mine won't still!)
6.30 - out of bath, quick cuddle all three of us in mummy's bed and into pj's. (bottle of milk for 1yo)
7pm - in own rooms in bed and lights off.

put them in their own beds awake and try and get them used to falling asleep in their own beds, rather than with a dvd would be my advice. it helps if they wake in night, they can self settle unless they are ill etc.

also, consistency - they may be getting stressed as sometimes they watch dv sometimes not. do the same thing every night,

good luck.

similar ages here, 3 and 17mo. They share a room so we have bath at 6, pajamas, milk for the little one, then brush teeth together, last loo trip and stories in own beds. One story each then a cuddle each, lights off and door left ajar with the hall light on. Asleep by 7pm most nights unless they are ill.

I'd knock the DVD on the head as my two would be super stimulated and irritated by that when they are tired.

Rare occurrence with the DVD. Usually stories or just cuddles in our bed. Their night wake (if any) lo wakes once a night (only this week as she's cut two new teeth) doesn't make any difference if we've done stories or anything.

When it was just dd1, from 14m she would have a bottle and cuddle, then settle alone in her bed. But dd2 doesn't like to at present, and they end up just nattering to each other or mucking about..

I'm not complaining, We love the evening snuggles as a family, as it's nice time for dp with them too. So the snuggles are a nice time. We have dc3 arriving in about 9 weeks so another change will happen with routine so nothing can be set in stone I think?

There may be something slightly different some weeks as it's the activities before dinner (dd1 does a little dance class) or say dp has football Thursdays, we do swimming Friday pm those are the things that make the change I think?

Both refusing to go down tonight. I end up getting stressed as I'm tired. End up snapping at them. Hey won't just lay in their bed sometimes. So dd2 is with dp but asking for me. I lay wih er but she won't relax. Dd1 is with dp and doesn't want me. And I just feel like shit mum dot com

You've had some good advice on this thread..to be blunt, follow it.

Atm they're falling asleep with you in your bed with a dvd on from what you've said in your post. How then can you then expect them to fall asleep on their own and get grumpy with them when they don't do it?

They're not used to that, because that's not normal for them.

Normal for them is lying with you and being cuddled to sleep - if you want to change that as you have another one arriving soon and I presume you won't be able to keep it up, start putting them in their own beds to go to sleep alone.

You can still have a quick snuggle in the bed all together for 5 mins - this is what I do, five minutes in mummy's bed and then into your own beds for sleepytime.

If they're in the same room, they will probably natter together for a bit, but will have to fall asleep eventually.

Consistency is the key - whatever you want to do, stick to it, so they know what the routine is.

I would advise putting them in their own beds, saying sleepytime, lights out and leave the room, keep going in and stroking faces and saying sleepytime and leave the room. Repeat and repeat until they understand they are now going to sleep on their own in their own room.

If you don't want to do this, then cuddle them to sleep every night, but don't be surprised or annoyed if when you want them to go to sleep alone they won't lie down in their own beds and call for you.

It will probably take a while to change the existing habit, but well worth in the long run.

Good luck.

I would never let them CIO. Never use that. Just my personal preference. The DVD hasn't happened in a while. I try to read books. Dd1 is a lot easier. And dd2 just will not stay in her cot on her own to settle.

I ofer cuddles, kisses etc. And will not let them feel like they're being shoved to sleep. I will put them in their room and see if they get upset. In which case I'll respond with soothing then try again. I'm doing this tonight and isn't going well lol

I think it will be easier when dd2 is in a toddler bed as I just think she hates the bars as she can see dd1 is in a nice bed (which she loves too) so it's also hard to read stories to both as we don't all fit in her toddler bed!

I like to think I am attachment/own alteration parenting. I would just love for them to settle earlier if anything as it's eating away the evenings up to 9/930.

Trying to work out dd2 day naps as well. If that makes much of a difference.

Also side note. Doesn't help me trying to settle them and dp and brother are making noise laughing at the tele downstairs