Why do I do everything? He has another parent!

[aideesmum]

Since ds was born (now 16 months) I have had to do everything with him, ie, change nappies, bath him, feed him, play etc etc the list goes on.
I had an emergency caesarian and even when I came out of hospital dp was going to go to work the next day (the midwife changed his mind very quickly!).
I'm now at the point where it really aggravates me and is getting me down that his dad will not do anything, he moans if ds crys.
I am working part-time (30hrs) and dp works full-time and I cannot go on like this anymore.
Has anyone got any suggestions to get his dad to help me with things? It is making me want to leave him.
I would love one day to have a lay-in......dream.

You gotta talk to him. Then draw up a rota particularly for lie ins!

aww bless you,it must be so hard,sit him down&say i seriously have to talk to you&be honest that you need him to be a parent too
goodluckxx

I think we women make the mistake of trying to do everything right at the beginning and we kind of play the mother role and do it so convincingly that it all stays in our hands. What we should get taught in these preparation courses is how to involve the father from the word go.

I would say try to leave dh with dc alone every Saturday while you go off and do something alone so he just HAS to cope and get into it. Even if you have to make up doing a seminar for work or something or sign up for the gym or whatever.

I'm amazed you've got to 16 months like this! And 30 hours a week is hardly a small part-time job - and anyway you're working all the flipping time!

You've GOT to get him to do stuff or it'll drive you bonkers and won't do the relationship any good long term. Have you tried talking to him? Surely he could take over at weekends - early mornings/take ds out to the park for an hour or two?

Maybe if your dp's never done it he's worried about if he can? Could you organise someone to insist that you go out for the day with them - a friend's birthday lunch, or shopping for something - so you have to leave ds with him?

ab out time you told him to get off his arse.

book a weekend away