Bedtime for more than one?

[laughingeyes2013]

How does everyone manage it? And teatime for that matter.

I find that my 5 month old screams (hunger and tiredness not a good combination) and if I deal with him first my 3 year old goes to bed far too late. They always seem to need me at the same time.

I I deal with toddler first then we do everything with a screaming baby which gives us indigestion and ruins story time!

If I bath and feed baby first he goes to bed too early and then wakes up ready to start the day at 5:30am.

What do people do?!!!

Don't know but watching with interest as in a couple of months we will need to figure this out. While I'm on mat leave DH and I are both here at bedtime but from March we will need to have a system one of us can do alone for DD who is 4 and DS who will then be 9m. He is currently bf to sleep so that's our first hurdle which we'll be tackling once he reaches 6m in a couple of weeks (gulp).

I'm not sure. I think I fed tired baby whilst reading to the older one sometimes. And didnt wash them every day. Or put baby to bed after 3 year old.

Juggling them is difficult. I have three and bedtimes can be stressful. This is a phase and it too shall pass.

Oh god, I have 3 and quite frankly its nothing short of a nightmare at present. We go through stages of pure bliss then wham it all goes tits up. The baby always goes to bed first after being fed, bathed etc (6pm) then the two terrors follow at around 6.30pm, giving plenty of time for story and cuddles then a swift kick up the hole (sort if kidding) to bed at 7pm.

My advice overall is to try and stay as calm as possible, leave plenty if time and don't rush your toddler, they don't seem to respond well to this. Put the baby to bath/bed early. Good luck!

I tried feeding baby while sorting out 3 year old (story time and such) but he gets indignant if I don't sit still during a feed, so ruins the story with his fussing.

Ds is 3.4 and DD nearly 7m.

Bedtime goes ok and is often solo when dh late. So, tea at 5ish for both dc, or sometimes feed dd first if DS tea not suitable for her. Milk downstairs for DS and a cup of formula for dd (we're weaning).
Upstairs at 6.15ish DS plays while bath run, rooms got ready (dim lights, pjs out, groclock set, nappy and babygro and sleeping bag in bathroom), teeth for both, DS into bath then i put dd in for 5 mins, out and dressed, then DS out and dressed. Story while bf dd on DS bed. Say night night to DS. Dd into her room for further bf til sleepy then put down.

Doesn't end there of course as dd still up in the night but bedtime is good.

Bellablot - does your baby wake 11-12 hours later (so for you at 5 or 6am?).

DD is 10 months and DS is almost 3. DP gets home 6.30 at the earliest. So i do it all. This is our routine.
4.15ish tv on for DS, DD scoots around where i can see her with a toy. I tidy up, get dinner. Nearly always have prepared something earlier in the day.
4.45 - dinner, all eat together, tidy up as we go.
5.30 - bathtime, DS in, DD in, wash everyone, DD out dried and dressed, DS out.
6.15 - stories and supper, DS has supper and a drink of milk, DD is supposed to have a breadtfeed but she won't because she is too nosy! Read together.
6.40 - teeth
6.45 - DD in bag and one quick story in bed, DD on my lap
6.50ish light out, sit on the floor and feed DD to sleep whilst DS fiddles with my hair
On a good night everyone asleep by 7!

Twenty - does your baby cry with tiredness through all of this, if so, how do you get through it?!

make ds1 (1.9 )dinner at 5.
then while he eats I feed ds2 (8 months).
then take then both up for a bath at half 5.
bath both, take ds2 out first-get him dressed.
leave him on floor beside me then get ds1 out.
take both downstairs (My arms are very toned )
give ds2 bed bottle & sit ds1 down with warm milk,teddy & blanket.
put ds2 to bed around half 6/7.
let ds1 watch peppa for 15mins and have a cuddle. then take him up to bed. freedom by half 7

Laughing - baby sleeps through now for the most part, the odd night she can wake for a feed around 12 OR 5am, but then she will sleep until 7am. She has a 2 hour nap around 12 noon and then is ready for bed at 6pm. I've always found that it doesn't matter what time you send them to bed they will always get up around the same time. Some people I know disagree with this but there is no difference between a 6 and 7 oock bedtime. With other children to consider something had to be done and this has worked perfect for us. A baby should easily sleep 12-13 hours with a feed somewhere in the middle.

We cosleep, so co-bedtime too. DD1 is 3.6 and DD2 is nearly 5 months. I do bedtimes alone as DP usually works late.
Dinner at 5.30.
Wash or bath and teeth.
Upstairs to very big bed (two big IKEA beds clamped together -ace!) + bedside cot arrangement for nappy change, getting into PJs / sleeping bag and a story. (And a lick of Stop'n'Grow for DD1 at the moment .)
Lights out at 7, I lie down to feed DD2 in her cot (well, boobs in the cot, the rest of me on the bed ).
DD1 snuggles down in her space at the other end of the bed in the meantime and waits for her "thing" which is to have her back stroked. We might have a little whisper about the day or any other burning, last-minute issues arising in DD1's mind, but then she drifts off quickly.

Not usually stressful. Actually, tonight DD1 poked a scrunched up sticker up her nose, which I had to pick out with tweezers as it disintegrated into a snotty blob. So a bit of stress this evening, but otherwise straight forward.

Laughing she copes really well now but when she was younger she would sometimes be quite unsettled so on those nights DS would get a quick wash or shower. Also we watched a bit of TV before bed to give me the chance to sit and feed her whilst DS had some supper. Whilst not ideal, it did mean that DS was quietly engaged in something else so i could give her some time.

My life got a lot easier when I started putting my older toddler (there were 22 months between my two) in front of In the Night Garden while I got DC2 to bed. I recorded about 15 episodes on the Sky box, so I could turn it on whenever required. It did mean that DC1's bedtime could vary quite a bit, depending on how long feeds and settling younger one took but it was worth it. Fortunately it didn't become a life time habit and now they are both a bit older (2 and 4) we never watch TV in the evenings, but it really helped us get through a tough patch.

OP I could've written your post exactly. Currently am putting toddler to bed too early as baby is tired and hungry and ready for bed. Baby won't settle unless it's calm and quiet and I feed quietly which I can't do with toddler running around. This means however bedtimes are baby screaming hysterically while I run around like a lunatic doing bath, story time etc all through screams. Then once toddler is down I do baby's bedtime. Toddler however, wakes at 5am everyday.

Thanks folks.

I realise I need to probably go with his body clock rather than fight it which seems a bit futile really.

Then I can get him sorted in good time to start all over again with 3 year old.

Now all I have to do is make sure tea is never too late and therefore clashing with baby bath and early settle!

It feels like changing trains in a station on different platforms and with seconds to go

Its a nightmare isn't it! Dh not home till 7 most nights. Dd 4.5 mths, ds 6 and hates getting washed.

We have tea between 4.30 and 5. I leave DHs on a plate to heat up. I wash up etc. 6pm bath run for dd while ds watches tv. 6.20 ds gets in. I dry and dress dd while ds washes (protests!). Then ds out, dried and dressed. At this point it would be great if we had story time, milk, dd went to bed then ds.

It just doesn't happen. Dd screams, ds cries and basically it becomes hell. Dh comes home, has his tea and talks to ds. I try the low lights, bottle thing with dd who must think I'm trying to murder her the fuss she makes. Ds starts the I'm hungry, thirsty, my foots itchy, my hairs growing too fast distractions to bedtime. Dh stands about feeling (being) useless.

Eventually sometime before 8 I manage a story and get ds into bed. How long he stays there is hit and miss.

Dd is usually still refusing to sleep, eat, be put down etc.

I really need to do something about it but where do you start?

Cupcake78 - that made me really laugh. The hair growing too fast but just sums it up!

It's a comfort to know other people struggle too, somehow between up we'll have to find a way through surely?

Last night I decided to give up on stringing out the five month old and put him to bed at 6 o'clock. Really alternate, even though he had shown signs of being tired, he had second wind at 6 o'clock after his milk and was happy to watch the world go by for an hour! This gave me time to bath and settle the three year old, and was nice for everyone. It may have just been a fluke but wouldn't it be nice to have every night?!

I have struggled with juggling my 3, and have just learnt to accept that the oldest goes to bed a bit later than he should do. He still gets enough sleep as he sleeps in a bit later than the other two, but I would love to have him in bed by 7.30 but most nights it is 8pm.

The oldest 2 have TV and computer whilst I get youngest (2yo) to bed, she goes down very easily. Middle dc is a nightmare to settle, so can sometimes take half an hour. I feel shitty sometimes that my oldest (5yo) sometimes spends 45 minutes on his own entertaining himself on a bad night, but I have no choice as it is just me at bedtime.

cupcake when dd was younger I used to put her in her bouncy chair to watch whilst I got the other two in bed and settled - or in a sling feeding if she was being grouchy - bad times for my back, but seemed to work for them.

We've had all sorts! My teeth are too cold, my toe nails hurt, my skin is turning into a fish, I think
I heard Santa, my teddy keeps talking to me! I could write a book full of them.

I have found that dd2 has adjusted to our times, she has an afternoon nap from 2.30ish-5.30 ish so is able to stay awake until dd is in bed upstairs for teeth 7.30 so usually 8 at the latest. It does mean she also wants to sleep in until around 8 the next day (after night wakings) but we don't have anywhere to be that early so it doesn't matter. Up until around 5-6 months she was very overtired and grumpy a lot of the time but would also wake excitedly if she heard dd1 breathe so there was no point in trying to put her to bed earlier. Its easier for just me to put both to bed now they share.

Cupcake78 - I'd buy the book!