Cheap, free, brief non material rewards?

[Judyandherdreamofhorses]

Trying to make up a list of 'special things' to choose to do before bed as part of a reward system for 4 year old DD.

Not doing too well with the ideas though. So far we have: playing hide and seek, dancing to music, bubbles, crazy foam in the bath, playing a game on the iPad.

Can anyone help with ideas? They need to be short and doable between tea and bath (with baby brother in tow). Thanks.

Stay up 15 mins late?
DVD in bed?
I'm rubbish at this. My treats usually involve sweets which would not be good before bed!!

Dd1 gets an extra paragraph of a chapter book as a reward for reading with me.

snuggles on the sofa?

extra story?

(I realise baby brother may affect the feasibility of these)

We play the sock game. We put my basket of odd socks on the bed and throw them up in the air and see who can snatch the most. Baby brother joins in. Not sure why but they seem to regard it as a great treat. All I need to do now is work out how to get them to pair some at the same time.

Big kiss. Mummy gets to play any game dd wants (even if it Peppa Pig. Again.)

A jigsaw? Drawing? Reading a book? I know it'll sound like child labour but my kids love things like helping clear and clean the dining table, washing up some dishes, sorting out washing?

I'm blessed with DC who are remarkably easily impressed.

Generally anything which involves them being able to 'choose' is a winner.
This story or that one; I'll sing you a song - you can choose; this sticker or that one, what picture can I draw for you etc.

When DS1 was younger DP used to ask what picture he would like that evening at bathtime and would bring home a A4 print of whatever random thing it was to pin on his bedroom feltboard.
Never failed to delight!

As I said, easily impressed

High five?

Thanks. I love the sock game! And the printed picture is a great idea - with work's printer ink...

Ok, flame me, but why should your dd have to earn special things with her mummy? That's a bit sad to me.

If she misbehaves, you tell her off otherwise you get into a cycle of her only thinking that you will do nice things if she is a good girl - so setting her up to be a crowd pleaser.

SteamWisher, I have no words to describe the idiocy of your post. There is absolutely nothing in my OP to suggest DD has to 'earn special things with her mummy' (or even that I am her mummy, in fact). Do you not have the imagination to understand that other people might choose to do this differently to you, whether you think it's 'sad' or not? You have no idea how much time I spend with her, what we do, how we behave, and I didn't give that information because it was irrelevant to the OP - which was to ask for activity ideas.

Your school of thought is not the only 'right' one. It might be right for you.

And another thing. The parenting section of mumsnet is where people, often quite desparate, turn to for support and advice. It is not AIBU. If I had written my OP a year ago, in the grips of PND, and you had described what I was trying to do (to deal with the situation in my family, which may be very different to yours), I would have been very upset and driven to further despair.

Judy, it may have been the word 'rewards' in your title that led to steam wishers comment. Your op makes it clear you just want to do some special things with your dd.
We live bath crayons in our house. Dh is the artist, and the dcs tell him what to draw. They're currently into mixing different styles of dinosaurs into one body(!) Coloured bath bombs are also a huge hit.
We love story CDs at bedtime, so a new story cd (download for free from loads of places) might be good.
Ds3 likes to put his rescues to bed in my bed, then come and find them in the morning, after their 'sleep over'.

When we were little my mother sometimes used to have hairdresser time before bed, which was relaxing and felt special - sometimes she'd do our hair in braids or lots of little twirls so we could go to school the next day with funny wavy hair, sometimes she'd just brush it for ages and occasionally she'd let us do her hair (poor lady), with lots of barrettes and probably hair pulling . DS could 'help' picking things out or you and DD can brush his hair gently too!

Great ideas, thanks. Bath crayons would be great and DD would love the opportunity to cover my head with hair slides!

You said as part of a reward system for 4 year old DD

That's why I said what I did.

You did not say you were just looking for activities. It sounded like you were looking for rewards I.e. special things to do as a reward as opposed to just doing them.

And I didn't say "my school of thought was the right one".

What a nice idea, thats always kind of a waist time before bath kind of time in my house.
I love face painting crayons, paint each others faces guess who you are type thing!
Bathing dollys? Also like building sofa cushion houses.

Face painting! Why didn't I think of that? Brilliant.

My children used to love 'hide the frying pan'. One of us would hide it around the house then others would search with hotter/ colder etc. Not sure how it started but was always fun.
Also kitchen skittles or treasure hunts are good.
If you can get hold of big paper doing big pictures on the floor might be more calming before bed.
I love the hairdresser game but you can guarantee that someone will come to the door when you have been redesigned as a firework!

Big pictures sound good. And you've reminded me of 'hunt the thimble' (frying pan sounds easier!) which I used to love as a child. Thanks.

-Make a blanket den and read the story by torchlight inside the den.
-Look at stars out of the windows on clear nights.
-origami
-snap or other card games
-snakes and ladders