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Adult children living overseas

12 replies

JeanWalthamstow · 05/10/2013 17:50

My newly married daughter [only child] has been living in Sydney Australia for two years and is unlikely to come to live in England.
I find this quite upsetting and would like to hear from parent in a similar position. If this is you or you know anyone in that situation please reply here or send me a personal message.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
froken · 06/10/2013 08:39

Poor you :(

I am an adult child living abroad, my mum is proud of me ( and my brother, he also lives abroad) but she really misses us.

I only understand how hard it must be for my mum now that I have my own baby, I can't imagine how hard it would be for him to move a long way from me.

Have you been to visit your dd? Do you have plans to see her soon? Why does she live there?

I lived in Australia for a year and it really is a fabulous country.

Brew
TEErickOrTEEreat · 06/10/2013 09:00

I live in a different country from my mom.

Do you Skype a lot? Because that's what we do.

Dressingdown1 · 06/10/2013 09:12

My son has lived in China for the last 8 years. he is married to a Chinese woman, my very sweet dil, and has 2 lovely dc. I see him once or twice a year, normally I have to visit China because travelling with 2 small dc is difficult for him.

I talk to him several times a week and feel very close to him; closer in some ways than I do to my dd who lives an hour and a half away from us.

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AntsMarching · 06/10/2013 09:21

I'm an adult child living abroad.

My parents were very upset when I announced I was moving but understand that it's what will make me happiest (moved to be with DH). I have two small dds. We FaceTime weekly and I send them loads do pictures. FaceTime is great as it's free and they get to see and talk to the girls. It helps them feel closer. It helps my girls feel closer too. My in laws rarely FaceTime with us (despite giving them an iPhone for this purpose) and my girls are more distant with them even though they see them more often in the flesh.

Also, I go back to visit once a year, which is a huge undertaking with a 3yo and 1yo on a 9+ hour flight. My parents come about once every two years.

I'm sorry it upsets you, but I'm sure it's hard on your daughter too. At the end of the day, I'm sure you want her to be where she's happiest and there are lots of little ways to keep in touch so that the distance doesn't seem so much. I actually talk to my parents more now that I'm far away then I did when I lived in the same country.

mumtosp · 06/10/2013 09:24

I'm an adult child living away from my parents... I live in England and my parents live in India... I know it's sometimes very hard for my parents and also me..
I go to India at least once a year... may reduce now that I have a small DS :)
My parents also come over every other year...

We use Skype once a week and I call them twice a day !! A lot of people think it's extreme, but I'm very close to my mum... if I was living at home I would tell my mum about my day so I don't see why I cannot do the same just because I live in a different country :)

It does get easier...

Selks · 06/10/2013 09:29

I'm a parent in this position too. My son (26) lives in Brunei, which is a tiny country next to Malaysia. He's been there two years and I do miss him, I feel like I've missed two of his adult years and he's a different person now. I've seen him twice in two years, him and his wife will be here for Christmas - can't wait.
I am happy for him as he has a great life, but I do miss him.

sonjapatrice · 16/01/2017 20:00

Both my grown up children live abroad, one in Australia and one in U.S after meeting partners at University from those countries. It getting harder now the grandchildren are growing up. It hard at Christmas time when we can't meet up with them, as friend and family have they own family. I wonder if there are groups that meet up in local areas maybe once a month.

Capetown15 · 20/09/2017 16:20

I have two grown up children and one grandson living in New Zealand and South Africa. Would like to know if there are any groups out there with parents in a similar position in the UK?

MyBrilliantDisguise · 20/09/2017 16:21

OP, did you know that you have the right to move to Australia if she's there? Would you like to do that?

MyBrilliantDisguise · 20/09/2017 16:22

Here you go.

Katedotness1963 · 21/09/2017 17:49

I was the adult child who moved abroad, back when phone calls were expensive and we mostly wrote letters to keep in touch (remember the special writing paper and envelopes that were thin to cost less?).

Katedotness1963 · 21/09/2017 17:50

Crap! Ancient thread. Sorry.

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