My DS is obsessed with Dying

[aaronsmummy]

Help-my ds is obsessed with dying - he says he sees pics in his head of him dying in hospital as an old man and he is all alone. He also says he has seen his wife and children dies in a house fire!!!! I am scared. He has seemed down for a while.

How old?

I have read your other thread about your DS asking you to leave your DH....maybe this is why he is obsessed with dying

my DS is 4 and when my H left (8 mths ago) he became very obsessed with dying - for children it is the leaving aspect - thats all they understand

I think as on the other thr3ead, you need to address his issues with his dad....

HTH

I posted on your other thread and I think there may be a connection - he may be feeling upset by the situation in your family and this is a way of asking for reassurance from you. Also many children do go through a stage like this when they first start becoming properly aware of death.

Don't be scared, just give him lots of hugs and reassurance. The things he is saying are just his imagination, probably combined with news reports and natural fears.

Hate to say this but dh thinks he is being manipulative. I know he isnt - he is a sensitive boy and he knows i love him to bits but at times still accuses me of not loving him - we are really close so this breaks my heart. He has a lot to deal with, ds2 is asd and dd is just a baby yet.

it's just that he is so descriptive of what he see's, that's what is scaring me.

Aaronsmummy, is he 4? My ds, at 4, was deeply worried & upset about death. I started a thread like this, and found that this is quite a sensitive-4-year-old problem. And, in retrospect, maybe there was a "leaving" aspect with my ds (what mistressmiggins suggests) because dh and I were separated for 7 months when ds went through his death phase. Anyway, he's well over it now. . .they do get over it.

In the meantime, say anything you possibly can to reassure. My ds was most worried, as it turned out, by the thought of being separated from me if one of us died. Just tell him you'll always be together, you'll always be with him, etc. Maybe tell him about heaven (even if you don't believe in it). Well, that was the advice given to me: say whatever it takes to reassure him at this young age. (If your ds is 4 or so, that is.)

Medea - he is 7. He even says he has seen me die - maybe it is a fear someone leaving. I will reassure him and make plenty of time for him - lots of things to work out!!