It is hard. DH has just done his, we have a 2yo. I did mine back when we were young and free!
I find it best to be home as early as possible (after detentions, clubs, meetings, whatever other faff), pick DS up from cm as close to 5pm as possible, have tea and get him in bed for 7ish. Do the lunches & bags for the morning, then work till 11ish.
Weekends are DS time, although I'll sometimes do a bit of work while he's watching beebies, and evenings again (although depending on how the weeks gone, I'll give myself either Friday or Sunday off).
Mornings are manic. It's a finely tuned duet with taking turns in the shower and getting DS through his twelve breakfasts before dropping him off at the cm for 7:30.
If management appear to be in any doubt about my work as I nip past their offices at 3:20 (sometimes, 4:30 most times) I make sure I reply to emails, etc when I'm still working at 10pm+!
In my experience, the training year is the hardest. You're planning for other people, whereas your NQT you're planning for yourself. It gets easier after that (but you end up volunteering for more!)