Almost 2 year old watching a lot of TV...embarrassed its got this bad

[Acceptableinthe70s]

I've nc as I'm embarrassed things have got this bad am looking for some advice on how to get ds to watch less tv.

I was determined there would be no tv til 2 but over the last few months its crept in and he now watches an hour in the morning - every morning, and it's always Peppa Pig, then half an hour at lunch time, and then an hour at bedtime, so that's 2.5 hrs of TV a day!

He goes to nursery three morning a week (in which case there no tv at lunchtime) and the rest of time he's with me, we'll be out everyday, the two full day he's with me we'll do 2 a actuvities a day (Gymboree, soft play, music classes, swimming etc) one in the AM and one in the PM. The days are very structured so when he's not watching tv (at the times i said) we are always doing something interactive.

He's bright (I think) can count independently to 10 at 20 months, can count backwards from 5 at 21 months, has just started reciting the planets in order (gets some wrong but still impressive I think) and started talking in sentences from 17 months.

This isn't stealth boasting I just want to give you all the full facts.

Do you think 2 - 2.5 hrs of TV a day is too much? When he gets hysterical peppa pig is the only thing can bribe him with and will calm him down. He talks about peppa constantly as well.

I honestly don't know what to do, and it seems like everyone else's toddler doesn't watch tv. I feel a bit like a shit mum. What am I doing wrong? Honestly t just crept up on me, it started off with one episode and now he's obsessed! He loves his peppa pig toy and when we're out in the street I feel like other mums are secretly judging me.

Everyone else lies about how much tv their toddlers watch.

Don't worry about it, some days my two would watch more, some days they watch less.

You are not a shit mum, don't compare the time your child spends watching tv with the amount other kids watch it.
If you are not happy with the amount, then change it.
If you really are asking for personal opinions then I think 2 1/2 hrs a day for a 2 year old is too much. I'm sure many more will disagree with me.

Thank you both.

isla your post is quite blunt...I was asking or advice on how to cut back on the tv. Posting "if you're not happy with the amount thn change it" isn't that helpful. Clearly I feel bad about the amount and have asked advice on hw to cut it back.

Please refer to the first line in my post.

That sounds fine I've never really restricted DS, he has days where he would quite happily watch it all day if I didn't suggest something else, but more often than not he chooses to do other things instead, either with the TV in the background, not on at all or in another room where there is no TV.

It doesn't seem to have affected his development as he's always talking, and is starting to read and write despite not having started school yet! (He's nearly 5 so would be due to start this September)

You need to unclench! Aren't you exhausted from all of those activities? Fair play if you're happy with it/enjoying it, but please don't stress. He sounds fine.

I am exhausted from all the activities tell the truth yoni but I feel if we don't get out and do them, he'll be stuck indoors watching TV, and then the guilt kicks in.

BTW, you referred to bribing him with it, I don't think this is necessarily helpful as it makes it into a desirable thing. I don't see anything wrong with using TV as a downtime activity (some people do, but hey) but I wouldn't want to use it as bribery, but if you mean that you're redirecting him into sitting down watching TV when he's getting a bit hectic or overtired then fair enough.

Sounds fine to me. You are balancing the TV with plenty of other activities.

If you're exhausted then stop. There's no need to micromanage him so much. You can limit his TV while being at home - just turn it off and say "That's enough TV for today" or "Let's do some colouring instead" or just don't put it on in the first place.

I find if I get fed up of the TV or think DS has been watching it too long (or he gets banned because of bad behaviour) then I say it's time to stop watching now, he whines for about five seconds and flops about saying he's bored, and then he finds something to do if I leave him to it.

Try putting one of his most high valued toys in a separate room from the TV, DS had his train set only allowed in his bedroom and it really encouraged him to play up there rather than being downstairs all the time.

Thank you yoni. How would I sop the tv as bribery thing? He basically gets overtired or bored or just kicks off and the only way I can calm him down is the promise of peppa pig.

I'm very sorry, I really didn't didn't mean it to sound as blunt as it has come across, so I do apologise.
I meant that if you are only unhappy because you think other people might be judging you stuff 'em.
Can you get him to start amusing himself a bit more, with toys, books etc? rather than being entertained by you or the tv?
I'd be wary about giving into tantrums with tv, you might have a bit of a battle the first few times, but hold your nerve and he'll soon know you mean business.
Hope I've been a bit more helpful this time

Okay thank you everyone for the advice, I'll try it over the next few days and see how it goes.

Sorry isla it's hardto convey tone in writing, I'm sure I was being touchy. Thank you for the advice.

Honestly?
Don't sweat it
Your doing fine
Perhaps you could limit him to 3 hours a day
He's then actually watching LESS than allowed
Problem solved

IME kids go through phases with tv. Ds watched quite a lot as a toddler, not so interested now, he's 4, and rarely watches it in the summer.
I never did any structured classes, ds didn't really like them. He prefers playparks, woodland walks, trips to the beach, library, museums, that kind of thing.
As long as your wee one is getting plenty fresh air and exercise I really wouldn't worry too much.

Sometimes my dc will watch tv for 2.4 hours all in one go! Some days not at all. I personally feel that as long as you don't use the tv as a babysitter and dc are active and bright (as yours is) then you are not going wrong at all. My ds wouldn't have such an interesting vocabulary without Charlie and Lola, and dd grasped sounds thanks to alphablocks and the bloody rhyme rocket
You're doing great

Its probably too much but my ds watches about the same - every morning for an hour or so while I come round (my tired time) and at the very end of the day when he is exhausted and winding down for bath and bed.

I try to do colouring/puzzles instead but my interest wane's quickly....

Can you give a more specific situation - are you at home, out, what's happening, what sort of times etc? As I said, sometimes overtired DC do need quiet time and for some TV is a good way of encouraging this but others are better with colouring, stories or lying down quietly in their bed (ie, not-a-nap). For DS anything "relaxing" has never worked, the only thing that worked when he was little was being pushed around in his buggy or driven in the car, when older and this could not be replicated then TV is it. It's probably not so good to rely on TV as a relaxation tool when they are younger, but if it's helping there's nothing wrong with it IMO. Sometimes children need the equivalent of snuggling in a duvet watching Come Dine With Me on a loop!

Sounds ok, I wouldn't worry too much. The important thing is that you know what he's watching - and watch it with him sometimes so you can chat about it and make sure he's not zoning out. I am very strict about what I let DS watch and we do far more iPad and DVD episodes of a chosen series or things I've recorded. That way you avoid adverts and anything that personally drives you mad.

The other thing that's important to me is not having a tv on as background noise (bugbear of mine) but turning it off when he's playing so he can concentrate and you can chat about what you're doing.

It sounds like he's well-stimulated and adjusted and you've nothing to worry about. Typically they're awake for 12 hrs a day - a board game, a couple of stories and a painting session might only use up 1 hour and you've still a lot of day left!

If it really bothers you, you could try to make his screen time more "educational" - try recording lots of Alphablocks on CBeebies or phonics games on the iPad.

Dd sometimes watches a couple of hours a day, weekends etc, if you feel it's too much have you tried craft activities? Dd loved snipping, sticking, stickers etc, and she will do that in the mornings. Messy but...I often think they like tv when they are tired.

My son ended up watching a lot at that age when he fractured his leg. I wanted to cut it down when he was better and it was very hard for a few days but now he accepts that it only goes on at certain times of day and for a limited time (two episodes fireman sam or something in the morning, one epidsode after lunch and one before bath time). The rest of the time there is no negotiating (unless he is ill or something). Decide what is an amount you would be happy with and just get strict, you might have a few grim moments but then they will hopefully accept the new routine.

I agree too that some tv can be positive, ds has picked up lots of vocabulary from it, and also does lots of imaginative play based on fireman sam/thomas / octonauts.

Before ds was born I had all these fanciful notions about cutting tv to 30 mins a day etc. The reality is you can't entertain a child for 12 hours, however much you'd like to. Ds goes to a cm every day and has long days there on Tuesdays and Fridays. He glues, he paints, he runs around, has picnics at the park and is generally exhausted by the time he gets home. All he wants to do is snuggle with me on the sofa. His concentration for toys and games in the evening is non existent. I do limit tv at weekends and holidays though as I want to be out and about doing things together.

Sounds to me like you're doing a great job. Maybe cut down a wee bit if possible, but if not don't stress it too much!

The only other down time activity I would recommend is reading, the two of you together on the sofa. This is relaxing and they enjoy your attention. I think the amount if TV sounds ok to be honest but you could always swap the midday bit for books.

I think 2.5 hours a day is fine actually. Children are generally awake about 12 hours a day, so that leaves 9.5 hours without tv!! Look at it like that. You sound like your a great mum, doing a great job. Children are so demanding of your attention, I find tv gives me a break from them needing/wanting my attention. I can chill out with cup of tea! Unless you plonk child in front of tv ALL DAY it's very unlikely to effect development. When I opened your post I was expecting you to say tv is on from morning till night!; which is the case in many homes. I'd give yourself a break.