OK, tell me all about the 'playdate' protocols please....

[Legacy]

I've only fairly recently stopped working full time. Up until now DS1 (6) has mostly only had his very best friend over about once a fortnight, as this was all I could really manage to fit in.

As part of my new more flexible life (ha!) I want him to be able to have more friends over, as seems the norm with many of his friends. But I'm already feeling like it's a minefield...

Some of his mates seem to have LOADS of friends all at the same time (e.g. 8 or more boys from the class). Not sure I'm ready for that yet...

So give me all the details please...

• how often?
• how many?
• do I just leave them to it, or should I attempt to 'guide' them towards certain activities
• what do I feed them?
• do I have to invite younger siblings too?
• should I reel off the rules of the house when they arrive (can't stand kids trashing things)
• what responsibility should I give my son for entertaining (e.g. you get the drinks etc)
• do I invite the parents to come back a bit early and offer them a drink?

Any suggestions gratefully received. I know it sounds pathetic, but if you're not used to having kids you know less well around it's all rather daunting really...

My answers below:

One at a time
However often you feel like
leave them to it, that's the point
Ask if there are allergies/extreme dislikes but otherwise give them whatever you;d have given yours
No! No siblings expected ime
Yes, lay down law
Tell your ds to be polite and look after his guest
no unless you think they look really nice, in which case offer them wine when they pick up (but only if it's late enough or you'll come off as a lush)

HTH, it's fun and easy and your ds will love it and honestly, it's nothing to worry about!

ds4 I have a friend round for tea once a week.
they come alone that is without parents or siblings.
They get a cooked meal (whatever my ds is having)
I leave them to choose their own activities and keep a watchful eye. If room is trashed they have a tidy up time.
I dont give ds any responsibility other than to be polite to his guest
No I dont give parent a drink on pick up or drop off.
I throw two parties a year for everyone. A birthday party and a halloween party in the village hall. Everyone is catered for.