I feel so stupid. DS is ten months and just started crawling. I feel completely overwhelmed by it, and it's not even like I didn't know it'd be hard. I've seen other babies in my NCT class start moving, and seen it be hard for their mothers.
Getting a nappy on is impossible. He wakes himself up in the night to move, and is obviously exhausted but it's like he's compelled to do so. We co sleep and he wakes us both up four or five times a night crying because he's sat or standing up. He fights everything I do and believe me, I pick my battles!
I feel like I manhandle him now and it makes me uncomfortable. To add, my previously very chilled out little baby cries or whinges over everything now. Nothing is right. Everything elicits tears. He crawls away from me and cries.
I've been very led by attachment style from the moment he was born and though it was tough in the early days, this new separation-anxiety phase - I guess from world getting bigger through moving - is something I'm really struggling with.
It's not that I think he should be able to play independently - I just don't know how to handle this little ball of developmental rage. He wants me but he doesn't, he climbs on my lap but then arches back like i am restraining him. My baby used to be so smiley and happy! It's almost like he's a toddler - or a teenager - right now, compelled to act in contradictory, confusing way because he doesn't know what he wants, how I can make it right, or how to communicate anything with me.
Please tell me it's a phase. Please tell me it will pass.