Half-way thru the hols: Anyone else out there feel close to giving up?

[StickleTick]

A great friend took my DD and DS for 3 hours yesterday, just so that I could re-discover the house that both children have ravaged during the holidays.

Admittedly, I'm into week 3 of the worst throat/chest infection that I've had since having the children, and DS has begun investigation for possible autism. Suffice it to say, he regularly turns various rooms of the house into the barricades scene from Les Mis, and then goes wild when I try to regain floor space/entry.

...Anyway, in between violent sneezes [dust allergy], breaking the vacuum cleaner, and knocking a lamp over, I burst into tears. I never imagined that being a mum would mean giving up so much of my former self, [job, certain friends, finances, fashion sense, fitness, hobbies, apparently cheery disposition, spontaneity] and on occasion, ... seemingly gaining so little.

I guess I've been lucky until now, in that I'm mostly good at what I turn my hand to ... and yet, motherhood is something I seem to be making more of a mess of. Had I known I was going to find it so tricky, I'm not sure I would have entered into it, 10 years ago, with such enthusiasm, passion, and sheer determination.

Anyone else out there being driven so close to wanting their DC whisked away, or to disappear into a child-free haven ???? Any coping strategies??

Ah bless you, that sounds tough! Yes certainly I have days where my patience is either hanging by a thread or gone awol entirely. Mine are younger - ds1 has been in nursery and starts reception in September and dd2 is 9 1/2 months. I am finding constantly having to put on voices of various characters - Polluto from Tommy Zoom, Woody or Zurg from Toy Story, various cars from Cars2 - very wearing indeed. I love ds1 to bits and am in part dreading him starting full-time school and in part wondering how I can get through another 3 weeks without morphing into a shouty deranged Mumzilla. My best coping strategies are simply getting out and about lots. It doesn't matter where - the park, the library, local farm park, museum, gymnastics centre which does an hour of free play for small kids. I'm avoiding soft play centres as they will be heaving with wild youngsters and fed up mums. Or else I bung on a disney dvd and attempt to have a moment of peace. Hang on in there!

Oh yes. I fantasise regularly about running away to a beach in thailand, or rio, or well, anywhere really.

I suspect you are NOT making a mess of motherhood at all, and that in fact you're a really good mum. But yes, if you had any fun sort of life before, how can you not occasionally miss it - or you and who you were. But children are wonderful. Even if you only remember it occasionally when you come up for breath from amid the tears, mess and chaos. And it would be boring to not have any children when you're older. I plan to have a riotous late 40s onwards!!!

Coping strategy? Take each day as it comes - and remember that it won't last for ever. One day you'll be sipping cocktails somewhere exotic with your DH or DP without wondering where the little ones are! And then sleeping in the following day! Hang in there. All the mums I know feel just like you!

I nearly started this thread earlier. Yes, halfway! Unless you are in Scotland, you lucky buggers!

Too much shouting going on here. DC1 is much more tired and ratty than I had expected. I was so much looking forward to the holidays and getting some quality time with my DCs and....I've been on the verge of tears all day today. I've hit the wine tonight.

I honestly don't know how I will get through another three weeks, and that's even with some childcare.

heh, thanks for all this. I seem to be surrounded by uber-capable mums in this town, so hearing that others are reaching for wine o-clock, is reassuring, ... And, I agree wholeheartedly that escaping outside to do anything is the solution. It's just that DS's speech therapist tells me she deplores the mums who don't give their trying-toddlers more at-home carpet time.

Anyway, I'm feeling relieved as it's the weekend, which means the cavalry [DH] is here to whisk children away. At lest this 3 week old bug has cleared out my medicine cabinet from all the half bottles and old tubs of Vix, decongestant, various odds and ends containing paracetamol, cough mixture ...

And, 'nothing lasts for ever', is always good advice. In fact, I'm really cheered up by your sympathy, because part of me was expecting ... "heh, you've got what you wanted, get on with it,", and ... "of course it isn't that bad, pull yourself together,"....

So, really, thanks .