Did anyone grow up with older half-siblings?

[wholeshebang]

Just wondered how it was x

Thank you for sharing QTPie. Was it fairly happy for you and not too confusing?

I had 3 older half brothers. I loved them and was never aware of any angst between our parents or each other. I was the baby sister and they were all lovely to me (well, as lovely as teenage boys can be). We used to see them one weekend in a month, then for holidays, camping etc

It was only when I got to my early 20's that I realised how hard that whole relationship must have been for my parents and their mum and how well everyone had handled it really. They never seemed resentful of us. I hope they never felt like that anyway.

My DS (13) has a half sibling (now 5) through his dad and they tend to both have contact with their dad together.

I'm expecting DC2 soon (who will be a half sibling) and hadn't even thought about it being a problem! DS will be with his dad sometimes, and at home with us at other times. Kids get used to their life, however untraditional it may seem.

I have two older siblings myself who were 10 and 12 when I was born. Seems no odder than that to me.

The one thing we've always done is never use the word "half". They're just siblings - no need to qualify it.

Are you concerned about something in particular OP?

I had an older half sibling. I'm in my 30s now so it wasn't so common back then, but I obviously never knew any different.

I adored her but it was never returned. My DF and her mum's split was acrimonious. She was always told that it was DM who had split them up and has never liked DM, even though she discovered the truth from her DSF when she was older that is was actually his affair with her mother that split her parents up, my DM came along much later. My DF also worked away a lot, so she only ever saw him about once a month (we only saw him twice a month but for full weekends, her mother refused to let him see her every time he was home despite him having a very regular shift pattern).

She cut contact nearly 20 years ago, and we have no idea what she's up to or where she is anymore.

However I know others who have had far far happier experiences.

This may out me if any one knows me, I have three older half siblings by 13 - 17 years. We got on great I loved it as a child my older sister was like a cooler mother figure and my db's were great we have never ever called each other half siblings and if anyone try's to call us 'only half' we go mad we're all just brothers and sisters, me and dsis are very close now. Our dad and their mum don't get on but their mum has always been lovely with me

i was a 'half' sibling but the younger ones were told they were not related to us.

I have an older brother and sister (13 and 16 years older) on my mum's side and an older sister (16 years older) on my dad's side. My mum's kids lived with us until they were old enough to leave home, my dad's DD lived with her mum and we saw her less. From a sibling point of view, they and I adored each other as big siblings/baby sister. I was too young to know if there were any family tensions. Certainly my older siblings all got on very well with their respective step-parents (i.e. my dad for my mum's children, and my mum for my dad's daughter).

Since they were so much older than me, effectively they weren't really around as I was growing up so my upbringing was more like that of an only child. But I used to love seeing them - still do - and have never called them 'half-siblings'. Like rednellie looking back I suppose many things must have been hard for them and my parents but the fact that I never picked up on any tensions must have meant that they all worked hard at the extended family situation.

I have an older half sister (I'm in my 20s, she's in her 30s). When I was younger I described myself as an 'only child with a sister' - best of both worlds! When we were younger she stayed with us every other weekend but I never really 'knew' her, and then as she became a teenager and I was still a child we really had nothing in common, didn't see each other much and she wasn't a big part of my childhood which was a shame. Now we are both adults with our own children we get on brilliantly - consider ourselves 'sisters' not half sisters and see/speak to each each other very regularly.

All my siblings are ''half'' I have them on my mum and dads side and they all have other half siblings too, who I also call brother and sister. There are 8 of us in all and I never once felt confused. In fact we were and are a big very happy family and everyone got on and still does. We are all very close and don't refer to each other as half siblings.

Yes. I have a half brother and a half sister, who are 12 and 13 years older than me.

I got on well with my brother when I was little, but was obviously quite young when he left home so we weren't particularly close as siblings. My sister never liked me and still doesn't!

As they moved out in their teens I was effectively an only child.

yes it is insulting the 'half' thing - some people just dont get that.
i did feel for my son when my 'half sister' spelt it out for him that he was a 'half nephew'.
charming.

It wouldn't even occur to any of my brothers or sisters to ever describe us as half siblings, I'd be really upset if they did and if they called my daughter half niece, I think I'd give them this face

Some of your stories about older half brothers and sisters remind me of my own experience of having older siblings. I often say I had three dads, not two brothers!

Makes me think the age gap has more of an impact than the biology.

well if i were to say anything i would be ostracised from the 'family'

actually thanks for that rosa and others you made me realise it is not normal and not nice.

I have two "half" siblings and a "whole" one. We share the same father. We are all close as adults and do not use the "half" designation at all unless we need to clarify something to an outsider.

Very bad for me. Older half brothers were horrible.

My dad & his brother were the older half siblings and my dad (70 now!) is still very close to (loving relationships with) all his younger half-siblings.

I don't like the 'half' thing either, but it's hard sometimes explaining it all to other people as me and my brother are very very close, and I am less close with my half brothers....Although I always refer to them as brothers.

Not sure what I'm trying to say, but as we've got older me and my DB have got closer and closer and now if I say 'brother' most of my mates would think of him. So when I talk about my other brothers I sometimes use the 'half' tag...Make sense?

Why are you asking op? Are you worried about something in particular?

I have 2 older half brothers and 1 older half sister. I have a different dad to them. We all lived together with our mum but I would spend half a week every week with my dad and my grandparents (dads parents). I never thought of them has 'half'. They have younger half siblings on their side. When I was about 8 I moved in with my Grandparents and my older siblings went to live with their dad. I hardly ever saw, they never rang me or came to visit. My mum also hardly ever came to visit, she would arrange it then not show up. I don't know if she did the same with them.

My dad has been with my stepmum since I was about 5-6, they married when I was 11 and had my little sister when I was 13 (so technically my half sister). When I was 16 my Grandparents retired and moved to the coast, I moved in with my Dad etc as it was closer to my college and my bf. How ever I never really got on with my dad at the age. I moved to my Grandparents a couple of years later. My mum and I are in contact, I sometimes go and visit her and we might see one of my siblings. (they all live within 15min drive of each other) and see each other quite alot.
I think of my Grandparents of my second parents really.
And I quite like the fact I am the youngest on my mums side, an only child between my mum and dad and the eldest on my dads side.
It's never been confusing for us, only for friends when I try and explain

I have 2 half siblings. One off my dad and one off my mum. My brother off my mum who has always lived with us and i grew up with is my brother. No doubt about it. Never called him half. 6 years older he is. My dad who had a daughter i have only met twice. She is 40s i think. I dont call her my sister or even really half sister. I know nothing about her and vice versa, only whaty dad tells me. Sounds harsh but thats the way it is!

Not myself but DS has 3 much older 1/2 (only ever used if explaining the situation to others) siblings. They have such a wonderful relationship, very different to that of the older ones between themselves I think. He absolutely adores them and they're really like more fun parents to him.
I do worry a bit about what will happen when dSD 1 goes to uni next year. I hope that as time goes on they don't become less close.
Watching with interest

Yes, two halves two whole, but we all lived in the same house and grew up together (they were leaving home as I was going to secondary school). There's no difference between halves and whole sibs in my head. Actually the term makes me a bit uncomfortable - it seems wrong!

They have some other half siblings younger than us, but they didn't grow up together. It's a different relationship. They're not close to their father, either, as adults, but they are close to mine, so I think that makes a difference. Our family life is centred around our childhood home, where my father still lives and we all go to stay for holiday weekends together. My mum died years ago and I did worry a bit, for about ten seconds, that we might fall apart as a family without that common bond but in hindsight I was being ridiculous.