Really upset as mil and dh not supporting potty training - help

[PetitFilou1]

Started potty training yesterday - two accidents in the morning before we'd got some pants but then three wees out of five sits on the potty and one wee in the bath. Today has not been good. Ds wouldn't wee on waking up and had an accident at 5 to 9, sat on the potty loads between then and 12 with nothing happening then did a poo in his pants followed by wetting them twice in quick succession. My mil has said to my dh she doesn't think ds is ready . I have seen ds run to the potty, do a wee and get up again so I know he is. Ds is going to nursery tomorrow and dh says 'we will see what they say' ie they'll say ds is not ready and then I can get her to give up on it. I am really fed up. Can someone please give me some advice? I thought it was normal to have lots of accidents in the first couple of days? Also yesterday, he only weed every 1 - 1 3/4 hours so how often should I sit him on and for how long? I really don't want to give up but will if you all say I should......

Cod especially - help!

Yes it is normal to have accidents, but it isn’t a race either. When mine were learning, we had pants at home and nappies for playgroup and trips out the house until she was reliably dry. This was only partly convenience. I didn’t want to upset her by having wet clothes/car seat etc etc I don’t think it is true that you have to have one or the other. Mine didn’t switch overnight and needed "breaks" from only pants. I found mine were quite good in the mornings and quieter times of the day but when busy or tired they would "forget" and have accidents. I would try to judge the day and switch when appropriate to nappies for a few hours. This switching only lasted several weeks until they were confident enough to stay in pants all the time.
Everyone is different though. Some of my friends changed and then that was it with no going back. While I saw it as a little harsh as they were constantly being asked by stressed mummy if they needed the toilet and having accidents, they saw it as less confusing and made the change quicker. It is up to you and your child I guess.
Sorry, rambly thinking aloud post. If you really want it done your way, I guess you are going to ahve to talk to them and insist on it. However, I would try to relax a little and play it by ear, day by day.

I have just started DD and I have gone completely over to pants (as I did with DS) apart from nap and bedtime. The first day (last Friday) she didn't do one wee on the potty. But by last Thursday at nursery she had no accidents. Not been so good since but that's partly from being out and about making it more difficult.

I would stick to your guns because I agree it sounds like he could do it.

don't give up. it is horrendous esp without support. i was all for giving up with dd but my sister who was staying at the time told me i was doing really well and mil was all for it. i would have given up otherwise. stick at it for a couple of weeks. if he has run to the potty and done a wee he is definitely ready.

good luck

Yes have to admit to having a blazing row with DH on Friday night because I didn't think he was being supportive enough (watching football on telly with DS leaving me to deal with everything else). And I really needed a break by this point...

My dmum was here for a couple of days and encouraged me to start dd on pull up pants so she could at least get used to the feeling of being wet. DD was very excited at the 'pants' but I know she doesn't have a clue really what they are for. Hence yesterday I found her hiding in her db's bedroom really, really upset because she had done a poo in her 'pants'. I was heartbroken that she was so upset and I don't want my dd to feel any shame about going to the toilet. She is back on nappies today and we will try again in a few weeks when hopefully she will be a bit more ready.

Like everyone else I would say take it slowly.