Please help ... ��

[ChrissieTay]

I'm at breaking point - sat here crying my eyes out after feeling so anxious all day - yet again, put 2 DS's to bed at 7, yet they won't sleep, up down up down scared on own blah blah and here I am, screaming at them at almost 10pm because they STILL won't go ??.

I have tried EVERYTHING and believe me, nothing works whatsoever, I am also caring for my ill husband who had a Stroke & is brain damaged now, I just feel like I'm about to have a breakdown - I dread evenings EVERY night it has been this was with them for over a year, DS's are.almost 3 & almost 6, where the hell am I going wrong? Why are everyone else's kids normal and mine just don't want to sleep ? ??????

Could you compromise with the 6 year old and suggest a 7.30pm bedtime and make 7-7.30pm golden time? If he doesn't cooperate with you and go to bed at 7.30pm then 10minutes are taken away from his golden time the following night. Don't know that the 3 year old would understand this so just need to hope he would follow the 6 year old. Do you have a settling down routine?

Sounds like you have alot on your plate. I hope you get support in RL.

Oh goodness, you have so much going on. I think you are doing amazingly well to just get through each day.
Firstly, do you get any help with your husband? Can you get some?
Do you get any time without the children?
Not sleeping is quite normal for some children sadly!
Sleep training is possible but takes some time and a LOT of patience and emotional strength which sounds like something you may not have a lot of right now.
We have used the back to bed technique
www.supernanny.co.uk/Advice/-/Parenting-Skills/-/Routine-and-Teamwork/Getting-Toddlers-to-Stay-in-Bed.aspx

It worked for us. It can be very hard work for a while and I've never tried it with 2 at once or with older children.

I always had a later bedtime for mine (I have 5), mainly because daddy wasn't home from work until 6.45 and we liked to have dinner together. Maybe they are just not tired enough at 7? Maybe try a later bedtime, say 8-8.30? (If you've not tried this already that is).

are you trying to put them to bed at the same time? if so maybe give the 6 year old a later bed time while you settle the 3 year old. you could let the 6 year old watch a dvd while you do so, then settle the 6 year old.

you have so much going on im not surprised you are at breaking point. I hope you find something that works for you and soon.

I'm so sorry about your DH. How devastating for you all. Do you have outside help with his care? It is a lot for anyone, let alone with two children. The hospital should have put support in place for you before discharge.

Is the playing up at bedtime a new thing or is it ongoing? Hope you are doing ok

Im sorrry about what you are going through. I know some people would hate the way I do it but I have 5 to get to sleep and I just basically put them n bed (bath story etc)
then I grab the ipad and sit on the landing in the middle of all the bedrooms. If I hear anyone walk around I go in say get into bed if that doesnt work I physically put them. Then sit where they can see me. Just make sure I am all over them like a rash. It sometimes takes a while but 99% of nights within 20 minutes the younger ones are asleep and the older ones are settled enough to leave.