9 month old will only breastfeed to sleep, help!!

[Sina14]

Hi everyone,
Has anyone got any ideas how I can break this cycle without upsetting my son?! Basically lo will only go to sleep at night if I breastfeed, I want to stop feeding when he gets to 1 year as I need to go back to work. He wakes up in the night once or twice and I feed him back to sleep. We've tried giving him a bottle but he just pushes it away and cries for me! Anyone had similar problems and overcome it? I'm not comfortable with crying it out. Any help would be appreciated :-)

This is a tricky situation and one I have faced with both my boys. Is he exclusively bf? Does he normally take a bottle or a dummy at all? How old is he?

Neither of mine took a bottle or dummy, so although I was keen to cut the dependence, I'm afraid I just carried on feeding to sleep until eventually they stopped (at around 2, sorry!).

However, I have heard of some people who have had success by replacing the breast with a dummy. Basically they have started to bf and then when they are on the cusp of sleep they replace with a dummy. Gradually they move the dummy into the equation sooner, until eventually the dummy becomes the sleep inducer. I've heard of people doing similar with a bottle.

What kind of job do you have? Do you have to stop bf at 1? The reason why I ask is that I found I had amazing reserves to carry on as before and keeping the bf relationship going when I went back to work really helped us both. However, many, many people stop when they go back, so if it's what you really feel is best for you then I would try the above.

Good luck!

Just wondering really. Does it take a long time for him to go to sleep or is it a case of pop him on the boob and he zonks out? If it's the latter, is that too much of a problem?

Thanks for the replies, hes 9 months, sometimes he goes straight to sleep within seconds but won't let me put him down for an hour or sometimes more, so I'm just sitting with him while he uses me as a dummy!
He doesn't have a dummy at the moment and we have tried him with one. He just plays with it!
I work shifts so won't always be around at his bed time when I'm working again.
Tailtwister did your boys just decide to stop by themselves or did you decide to stop?

If your not there he'll get the idea. He'll either take bottles or quite likely a feeding cup at a year old.

DD2 never took a bottle and at 12y doesn't drink milk, but she'd happily have yoghurt and a cup of squash at bed time from around 8-9 months.

At first she sometimes wanted a midnight BF, but nothing like always.

(She carried on feeding at bed time for years, but never moaned that once or twice a week I wasn't about).

I just wanted to find another way of getting him settled before I'm back at work so I know he'll be ok without me! (I know that sounds stupid but I just hate the thought of him crying for me). I have images of his dad driving him round for hours so he sleeps! :-(

Hi there! My lo is 7 and half mo and does the same at the moment, although he has only started this since moving into own room. I am trying to stop this sleep association by taking him off the breast as soon as i notice that he is falling asleep. He may root and cry so i put him back on but again break the seal as soon as hes falling. Sometimes he will then be rocked to sleep in a minute or two but others he will just cry until i replace boob. I am going by the 'no cry sleep solution' book. It has great advice and i can recommend it! Got mine of ebay for just a couple of ££.

What i have also started doin is trying not to feed as soon as he cries at night. If he wakes within 3 hrs of a feed, i refuse to feed but will cuddle, rock, shhh and do whatever i need to until he is asleep again. Yes he cries and yes its heartbreaking but he usually then sleeps another couple of hours and within a couple of nights, doesnt wake at this time anymore.

Another this with takig a bottle, ds wouldnt take one but i started offering only water in it for a few weeks and then when he eventually drank water from it, i started i troducing milk in it with his meals and now he will drink milk out of it when we are out and about or at home but will not fall asleep with one! godammit

Sorry bit of an essay! I feel your worry as i am going away for a few nights and dh is terrified that ds will scream all night whilst im away!

We "cracked" at around 8.5mo when our DD would only feed to sleep. I said I'd had enough and handed her to DP - he rocked her gently to sleep in ten minutes! Now he does every evening. I breastfeed just after evening meal and we've broken the "feed to sleep" association as long as it's someone else putting her to bed (not me else she can't settle without boob!).

Get a yoga ball and rock to sleep, then feed when she wakes. I've started doing it with my ds too, who is 7 months. It takes time

We are in a very similar position OP. Our plan is to try more or less with SpooMoo suggests - break the association by feeding DD before bedtime, even in a different room I think, and then have DH rock her to sleep.

Hope you'll find a good solution!

Thanks alot everyone, I'll let you know how it goes! Has helped just knowing others are in the same situation! :-) x