What causes a baby to be able to self soothe?

[weeblueberry]

My antenatal buddy and I were talking about our 10 week olds bedtime schedules earlier. I told her that our wee one gets swaddled after her bath and feed and is just put in the bassinet in the living room where she falls asleep (usually without crying/moaning about it). Friend seemed shocked that she could self soothe at that age and said her baby generally needs to be held as she goes to sleep.

Which begs the question of what causes a baby to be able to self soothe? Is it routine? Attachment? Just a generally more independent baby?

I admit we are pretty schedule orientated but always go to her if she cries/feed her if she is hungry between 3 hourly feeds etc.

It made me curious :)

Ok, they don't learn to 'self sooth' if that is in fact not the correct term. But they learn to fall asleep on their own. This learning is easier or more difficult depending on the temperament of the child.

I think it definitely starts with the personality of the baby but also what you do with them plays a part.
From about 4-6 weeks old DS3 didn't want to be cuddled to sleep, he fussed and cried when he was tired and would become increasingly upset if he wasn't put down. However it took us a little while to realise it was the holding making him cry and for a time we had a vicious cycle of not wanting to put him down crying and him crying more if we didn't put him down.

Looking back DD (PFB) was exactly the same but being less experienced we just persevered with the whole holding, rocking, shushing, feeding, singing, music on etc which soon evolved into an elaborate routine that DD ended up relying on in order to sleep.