Guilt

[Lill]

The word guilt is probably 1 of the words that appears the most throught the majority of threads. It seems that in modern parenting guilt goes with the territory. Do any of you think that sites like this actually help to eliminate guilt or does it infact make it worse. Are we, as mothers trying desperately to obsolve ourselves of guilt by moving onto others. In other words by making others feel worse about their decisions we can feel better about our own.

Lill
I'm not quite sure what you mean in your post. Personally I find these parenting message boards very helpful, because it helps me to see that I am not alone in certain aspects of raising my child. Because I only have one little boy, I don't have any other children to compare him to so it helps to talk to other mothers to see if they have similar problems with their children. I think this board is just a way for us to discuss various subjects and give each other advice. A lot of people probably do harbour some sort of guilt but I don't think it hurts to talk about it, in fact it probably helps to get it off your chest and to hear that you are not alone.

My point was not intended to be a criticism, and I think the sucess of this site speaks for itself.
it is just I have rently found myself getting emotionaly caught up in some of the threads as others have done before me. It would be awful if one comment made by an individual left another feeling guilty about some aspect of childcare.

Lill, Hmm yes, but that's always the risk when you enter any group discussion, virtual or not. You can get catty and critical comments wherever you go. If comments on sites like this aren't sent to be deliberately hurtful or personal, and come with the proviso - 'well this is only how I see it - but I'm not knocking you for seeing things differently' then why feel guilty about how someone else chooses to live their life?

Anyway, I havn't a clue who I'm really posting to, so why should I get wound up?. For all I know, Chanelno5 could be a couple of off-duty north sea oil workers. This is the internet, after all. To you, I may just as well be a group of six formers having a laugh. Apart from the Vinopolis people who I have met, the rest of you could be anyone out there. People can and do post here with more than one nickname as well.

Just for the record I suspect sml and croppy are one and the same, and Scummymummy is really Geoffrey Archer, though then again, perhaps not, because scummy writes better!

Tigermoth that is a hateful insult to ScummyMummy and I suggest you retract it immediately!
Lill, I know what you mean - but even when I see things on here that dismay me I still find it useful to know that such feelings and opinions exist. Some of the more argumentative postings make me very thankful for my real live parent friends but mostly I think this site is a priceless resource for sharing info and giving each other support.

Eek! Better retract 'Geoffrey' definitely. Spelling is not our strung point. Us sixth formers are in bottom set for Engish Lit!

spelling! Strong!!

Scummymummy is funny, whereas Jeffrey A.......

Tigermoth1 - A couple of off-duty north sea oil workers eh? Is that before or after the diet? Still, I'd rather be that than Geoffrey Archer! Are you a group of 6th formers having a laugh? Fancy an educational school trip to a North Sea oil rig then? I was only having a quick nose at this thread out of interest (my mum is doing cooking with dd and friend - bless her) but I'm glad I did as it's given me a good laugh (sorry, I know it's meant to be serious) What a disappointment it will be when weedy old me turns up at the Mumsnet meet-up if you're expecting a couple of hunky men!

Tigermoth - I hope Croppy isn't insulted by that one! Wish I had her legal knowledge - and tidy house as well! (I have just read the Disorganised Chaos thread for the first time)

Darn it, Tigermoth, you've blown DH's cover! He's back offshore tomorrow and now it looks as though he'll have to start using another nickname, to maintain anonymity. Wonder what he'll choose? It always takes me a few days to work which one he is, though I've had my suspicions about Jbr for a while now.......

I think if anyone's having a bad day with the kids and feeling guilty, or like the Dragonlady Mum from Hell (and that's just how I look AND feel on an average day lol) then they should log on to mumsnet and it will cheer them up no end!!!!

Either that or grab a cuppa and a penguin (or timtam!)

You guys are brilliant!!!!!

PS Seriously though I think as long as you accept things at face value, don't take things too personally and realise that opinions are just that, then places like this are excellent. The more wisdom, ideas and points of view I can absorb the better, I reckon! (They should have called this site mumswisdom!!!) We're all doing the toughest and most frustrating (and rewarding) job on the planet the best way we know how...some days are easier than others, that's all!!!