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Parenting

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Original poster

Do you let your 2 1/2 yr old..........

40 replies

alligator · 08/06/2006 09:22

Go on the climbing frame and up the big slide by themselves?

Its just that dp is getting a bit paranoid as dd loves climbing and swarms up the climbing frames/slides etc easily and he's been getting a few comments/ looks about letting her go by herself. She is quite capable and has only ever fallen once when she tried to leap for the firemans pole on her own (she nearly did it an all just couldnt get her legs wrapped round) Am kinda surprised about this cos I would have thought by 2 1/2 most kids would be off climbing by themselves. Maybe its because shes quite small for her age? Help me to reassure him please.

thanks

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Lio · 08/06/2006 10:32

Would love ds (2.9) to be so adventurous – he recently started refusing slides and climbing frames, so I have the opposite problem of wanting him to explore more but not wanting to make it an issue...

FlameBoo · 08/06/2006 10:50

To be fair MoM - the doctor said that she'd "bent" it rather than "broken"

Original poster

alligator · 08/06/2006 12:45

thanks everyone. I know dp is a great dad and really works hard at it. He just needs to have more faith in himself I think cos dd is a happy kid. Guess he gets a bit worried when other people pass comment on his parenting techniques like we all do.

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hex · 08/06/2006 13:05

I believe that one of the things we need to encourage kids to do is to negotiate their own boundaries about what is safe and what isn't. I'd hover but try not to intervene (as long as it's not hugely dangerous). Once they're 2.5, I think they'd pretty much be fine. We let dd1 pretty much do what she wanted. dd2 (who's just turned one) is starting to explore - wants to climb, clamber up onto deckchairs herself. I let her but when she tries to get down I turn her so she comes down backwards so she learns safest way.
We've not long returned from Australia and they let their kids there take so many more physical risks. Huge climbing frames, lots of brilliant wooden structures in public parks - perhaps this is why they are so good at sports!

wannaBe1974 · 08/06/2006 14:04

OMG, wish my mother could have a conversation with some of you. My sister's DS will be 3 next month and if my mum takes him to the park, something which she rarely does as she feels that parks are full of common people (silly cow), she doesn't allow him to go up anything! if the advisery says "from 3 years" she says "no you're too young for that", and the slides etc that are for younger children she holds on to him as he climbs up the ladder and catches him as he comes down! In fact she even does this on his little tykes slide in the garden! She just won't listen when I tell her she's being over cautious.

My rule is that if DS can get up on it without assistance, then he's allowed up there. Kids have to fall/slip/hurt themselves sometimes, as long as no serious injuries occur, a couple of scrapes never hurt anyone.

PetitFilou1 · 08/06/2006 14:11

On the big slide yes (but I watch him like a hawk) on the climbing frame no - he doesn't know his own limits (he nearly did the leap from the firemans pole thing too but I got there just in time....)

ProfYaffle · 08/06/2006 14:30

DD is 2.2 and just recently has been going up the big slide on her own which is doing my blood pressure no good at all! I'm kind of getting used to it but the worst things are those adventure playground type things which have almost vertical 'ladders' made out of logs, she can climb up those but I won't let her get down by herself.

I'm a bit of a wuss though.

Squirrel3 · 08/06/2006 15:21

Alligator, I injured myself on one of those little tikes rockers when I was small, still have the scar to prove it. My tooth went straight through my lip!

I think you dp is doing the right thing, let her do it if she feels confident, but lurk just in case. I think that sometimes I was over cautious with my two when they were younger (my excuse being dd is disabled) and now I look at my dp with his kids (his theory is much the same as sugarfree) and I sometimes wish that I could have been more like him and let mine find their own boundaries about what is safe and what isn't. They tend to grow up into more confident adults.

Original poster

alligator · 08/06/2006 15:26

thats exactly what dd did Squirrel. All dp fault for waving a packet of crisps at her . She gets soooooo excited over small things, bless her, a bit like her mammy with a pintof the black stuff.

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Twiglett · 08/06/2006 15:32

my 2 year old goes up and over anything and everything but I do try to stay close without interfering

unless it is DS's slide in the garden (4 steps and bumpy slide) .. she's been up and down that one for 6 months

I took her swimming for the first time on Saturday .. within 5 minutes she was climbing out on to the side and launching herself back in .. she has no fear that one, no fear at all

yomellamoHelly · 08/06/2006 15:35

At ds's pre-school they actually encourage them to do those things by themselves, though obviously thye stand close by just in case. Ds, though, lacks the confidence and will freeze after 4 steps until he feels a hand on his back.

robin3 · 08/06/2006 16:01

We stand behind him as he climbs just in case his feet slip, but are not 'allowed' to hold on to him. That said they're not the chain type climbing frames - they're all solid wooden structures. Slides no problem.

You have to supervise a bit because other bigger kids can so easily topple a toddler.

jamese · 09/06/2006 09:04

another hang arounder.. DD won't let me help her anyway. I let her try but make sure I could catch her, if she can do it, I let her get on with it.

Re very big slides, I (or friends children etc) walk behind her in case she falls backwards on the steps. no problem with her coming down the slide ok, but do worry about the tall metal steps.

If she can't do it, she will let me hold onto her to push her up etc, but will try her hardest herself first.

I remember the first time I let her do slides herself was at a soft play area. I had always gone down with her, but my friend whose DS is only 1 month younger let him get on with it. So I left DD alone and she was fine, and I got to sit and chat to my friend...

Different story at soft play now as now DD is 2.5 she goes on the BIG stuff and no way can she play on that herself so I always go with her but only help when needed and I love it.

hunkermunker · 09/06/2006 09:33

DS1 was a relatively late walker and is still not all that steady (think Maggie Simpson type tumbles), even at two and a bit. But he LOVES climbing so I let him. I think that positive "Oh, wow, look how well you got up there!" type encouragement is the way forward not "Oh, be careful, oh, it's too high" - that's just mental.

Elibean · 09/06/2006 09:51

dd was a late walker too, but at 2.5 she is an avid climber. I hover, but don't touch unless asked - most of the time. Have to confess I'm an anxious Mum in playgrounds (legacy of my own mother) so have to work hard at pulling back - tend to let dh take her to the 'big' playgrounds, he's much better for her on that score.

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