35 year old sister, single and panicking - older mums please........

[yummimummy]

My sister is starting to panic about whether she will ever find a relationship and have kids as she is 35 and has not had a relationship for some years ( she is intelligent and attractive but just doesn't meet anyone new).
I'm looking for inspiring stories to pass on to her about women who meet someone after 35 and settle down and have kids.
I'm an 'older mum' myself - married at 35, baby at 36.

P.S. Thankyou for all the messages, which have been inspiring and given me hope :)

I think that some of it is luck (right place and time etc), but a big chunk of it is making it the right place and time. I would recommend that you find a variety of activities that you enjoy and find easy to join in, whether it is a local theatre group, the gym, reading circle, voluntary work, salsa classes, you name it, you just have to get out there and have a great time. Relaxed, happy people enjoying themselves with people that share the same interest have a much higher chance of meeting the "right" person than those on tense and nervous dates based on paper stats. At least that is my take on it. Be brave, join in and get out there as much as you can :)

I met DP at 36 (nearer 37) and have had 2 pregnancies since. Sadly, I miscarried the 1st but became pregnant again when I was 38 and had my DD just before my 39th birthday.

I married dh at 33, had dd at 34, now expecting No.2 at 37. Before I met dh, I just re-located to London, knew absolutely no-one, high pressure job. I had a 2 year drought, then a year of Mr In-betweens.

Agree with 2cats that you have to kiss alot of frogs to recognise the prince. So be brave - your sister should just put herself out there - join clubs, hobbies, internet dating, whatever. A lot of people she meets will be dross and soul-destroying. But the dating helps to open your mind to genuine qualities in Mr Right - who may not always come in the guise of Colin Firth! Good luck and have fun!!

Have to reiterate what eveyone else has said re: meeting men. I had practically given up when I met dh. We were introduced at a Fireworks celebration and actually no particular sparks (excuse the pun!) that time. Then we bumped into each other at another event 3 months later, then again a month later and bam - each time the chemistry was stronger. I have to say that also that was the year that I really got active in all sorts of things going on in the community which evidently made the difference.

I met my dh when I was 34 got married 10 months later and had dd exactly 12 months after that. I had truly given up all hope of ever meeting anyone let alone start a family. I was fed up of people telling me...'it's when you least expect it' or 'there's someone for everyone'...blah, blah, blah. BUT...it is true!!!!! I have to say it's really lovely reading all these wonderful threads about meeting people when you're 'that bit older' ....hurrah for all of us and good luck too!

I totally agree wishfulthinking.
It's great to hear all these wonderful stories from people who had pretty much given up hope of settling down and having a family. I'm sure there are definite advanteges to finding someone in your mid-late 30's in term of maturity, knowing what you want, appreciating different qualities in potential partners compared to meeting someone in your 20's. I'd love to see some stats on marriage successes in people who married in their 30's and I bet they are better than the stats for earlier marriages!
Anyway, thanks so much to everyone who has replied, it's definitely given my sis some hope (and I think she is considering trying Guardian Soulmates too).

I'm divorced and met my dh 3yrs ago. I need some advice please!!!! i have 2dd and he has 1 - i would love another (i think- startimg again feels scary) but he is going for a vasectomy next month. Help. Any advice/help??

sorry princessb I just read your post.
Not sure that you meant to post on this thread as you've obcviously found Mr Right, but perhaps you're looking for advice about being an older mum??
It seems you problem is more to do with a discrepancy in yours and your DH's wishes re more kids.
I don't think I have any meaningful advice as I've never been in this position but I just wanted to bump this thread in case there was anyone else who might help.
I do hope so.
Does he know about your wish for another baby??

OP, are you still out there? Great thread... Wondering what the sequel is to your sister's story? My DSis is 37 and in similar situation. What are the best sites everyone for online dating for LTR? Other tips to meet someone when it feels like all your friends are in the married/baby phase?

Clara, my sister was newly divorced at 35, met new man at 36, engaged 6 months later, married another 6 months later and pregnant another 6 months later :) but not everyone is so lucky! But from what I have observed, the best thing to do is GO OUT! All the people I know who met someone went out a lot, made plans with friends. Also, do not be so picky or difficult. Good luck!

Well done to your sister mama, that's great! I think you're v right on the tips and will pass on. I think the challenge is sometimes making this happen when it feels like lots of your old 'going out' people are coupled up and in the baby phase. If anyone has tips there to pass on pls let me know!