Felling like I am a crap Mum

[Seasidermum]

I really struggle at times, I am a single parent to two lovely boys aged 8 and 14, their Dad has them a couple of nights a week but majority of care is down to me on my own. Don't get much support from my family, don't have many friends and my DP is working abroad at the moment and he is not a great support on the parenting front anyway.
So. I end up feeling overwhelmed and fed up a lot of the time and shout too much and I don't know what to do about it. I feel like I have nowhere to turn for help and like I am being such a rubbish Mum to them. It's been four years since I split with their Dad and it doesn't seem to get any easier, the sun is shining but we will struggle to get out today, just wanted to get some if this negativity off my chest in the hope it will help a bit.....

How long have you felt this way? we all tend to have odd days like this but I guess if this is longstanding maybe a chat with your gp?
Be kind to yourself sm.

I think we get in into a cycle of how we act and react.
You are not crap at all. You just need to break cycle.

What sort of stuff do you react it? Is it mess? That they take forever to get ready so you are late everywhere? Is it their attitude?

I don't think things change overnight but if you can pause yourself before you open your mouth to react, instead smile, shrug and say nothing or something pro-active then you won't give yourself a harsh time.

I find time and lack of it winds me up. Can you plan 1-1 time with them? A leisurely meal together or walk when you chat together and have time to reconnect in a happy way?

But you aren't crap. I think we just sometimes need to step back and remember to enjoy each other.