Car seats

[curious51dog]

Hi

I have an issue with my xp and father of my DD's.

He has access to the children overnight on a wed and from 12-5 on a Sunday. He allows my eldest to sit in the front of the car without a car seat. She is 6. Even though I have discussed this with him he continues to allow this to happen. I showed him the regulations and he agrees to sit her in the back with a booster and them doesn't bother. I explained to my daughter and she agreed that she would tell daddy she would rather sit in the back.

He has just dropped them off and both girls got out the back. I was so pleased! Until DD aged 4 said the older one was in the front until they stopped round the corner to change seats.

I know this isn't a huge issue to other people but its just the tip of the iceberg in my xp trying to be a friend to my girls rather than a father.

Sorry this is so long. Any advice would be appreciated.

That would majorly piss me off. Not sure what I would / could do about it though as obviously you have tried explaining / telling him what the law is? Report to police / stop contact? Has he got 2 seats? If not maybe buy them yourself? Think I would drum it into your 6 year old that she is not to sit in the front a bit more, maybes watch some car safety videos with her so at least she realises how serious it is?

Thank you so much for your reply. I have told her that I am taking her to the police station tomoro to discuss it with the police. I'm not trying to be ott but he is not taking it seriously and I only have control over her actions.

He only has one car seat despite me asking him to get 2. I will buy one for her to take on wed. The worst of all this is that he is a taxi driver and should really know better.

I love the idea about car safety videos, I will do this too.

Can't thank u enough for ur response xxx

What a dreadful situation for you OP.

I think it is a lot to expect a 6yo to make a stand and refuse to sit in the front. Your poor DD.

If I were you I would tell your xp that you have taken DD1 to the police station to discuss car safety so that he fully understands the seriousness of his actions. As he is a taxi driver, surely he cannot afford to have any driving offences, and I think it is 12 yo before a child can sit in the front without a car seat. Perhaps it might be an idea to find out the exact legal position when you go to the police station, so you are armed with this information on his next visit.

It sounds to me as though he is trying to be popular with the girls and this is his priority. On the plus side, if you show, as you are doing, that their safety comes first, he is a little less likely to take advantage in other areas.

Good luck.

Thanks for your response.

I feel terrible being angry with DD but I really hope to get thru to her and I'm hoping that if she chooses to sit in the back it removes him needing to be popular.

He is not very intelligent but can be quite abusive verbally do I think I will take her to the police, watch the road safety videos online and then speak to him taking the tact that she has put him in a position and I'm supporting him. I really hope it works, all I care about is my girls safety.

Thanks so much for your support, it's good to know others would feel the same.

if he is abusive verbally is he fit for unsupervised access?

don't involve the kids. Tell him that he uses the car seats or you call the police, and that you will NOT be supporting him after he loses his taxi licence as a result.

Hi special.

He is just abusive with me. He doesn't support the children in any way. Just splashes the cash on toys, making himself look brilliant and like a previous poster said, he is far more interested in being popular.

I am going to be assertive tomoro and have this conversation with him. Enough is enough!