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Original poster

Are teacher presents necessary ???

75 replies

SnoopyLovesYou · 25/06/2013 01:13

Last year my child bought a present for teacher and classroom assistant. One cost about £7-10 and the other £5. Bought them candles they probably didn't appreciate. This year however this particular child has 2 teachers. My OTHER child has 2 different crèche/Playgroup thingies. One is paid for. The other she has been going to for ages and is very reasonable.

My solution was to get children to make/ write cards rather than buying presents. However, gave first card this morning to paid Playgroup...

Icy response! :-(

Now the staff really are good and LOVELY but it's cost me a fortune this year. Thought they would like a handmade card. Em... no.

Any help please? Do I have to buy presents for all 4? Does anyone have any good and straightforward present ideas?

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HPsauceonbaconbuttiesmmm · 25/06/2013 07:23

I think a handmade card is a lovely idea.

If they don't like it, they're not the sort of person I'd want to buy a gift for anyway!

cornyblend37 · 25/06/2013 07:26

how rude!
a hand made card is a lovely gift

TheApprentice · 25/06/2013 07:27

I'm a teacher and I can say categorically of course you don"t have to buy presents. We do get paid! I'm really sorry that you have had an icy response because - do you know what I like best? Either something the child has made or a heartfelt thank you card from child/parent.

I have had some lovely gifts in the past and of course I am very grateful but I would never expect it.

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Chandon · 25/06/2013 07:31

I do heartfelt thanks to the good teachers and a " have a good holiday" to the not so bothered ones.

I think presents are unnecessary

phantomhairpuller · 25/06/2013 07:39

No I don't think they should get presents, they never did when I was at school. It's their career choice.

My best friend is a teacher and she finds the whole present buying thing highly unnecessary and often ends up with loads of naff presents cluttering up her house

I won't be buying presents for teacher once my DCs start school.

I think a homemade card is a lovely idea, something like that would mean more to me personally.

MoaningMingeWhingesAgain · 25/06/2013 07:40

IMHO it kind of depends on the culture of the school/nursery, I don't think our school usually receives much in the way of gifts TBH. My preschool gets given a lot of chocolates. I will be giving them something for the preschool when DS leaves next month. Eg a card and maybe chalks for the children and a letter in the autumn to say how he is going on at school.
I have made (knitted!) a nice thing for DDs teacher and will give sweets/chocs, nothing extravagant. I am amazed at some of the stories about whiprounds on here.

SweepTheHalls · 25/06/2013 07:43

A card with a message in it means more than a generic box of chocs for me any day

Smartiepants79 · 25/06/2013 07:53

I'm a teacher.
That playgroup is extremely rude and I would find another one.

I love anything that was handmade, shows much more thought and care.
I don't expect presents but they are nice, obviously.
Wouldn't occur to buy things for a playgroup.
Big box of nice biscuits for coffee time.

silverangel · 25/06/2013 07:55

How do you know they didn't like it, did they say something?! That's outrageous.

DH is a teacher and gets maybe one or two presents at the end of the year - last year he got a homemade cake and some biscuits, he definitley appreciated them and wouldn't expect anything.

poachedeggs · 25/06/2013 08:03

I think if I was a teacher the last thing I'd want would be thirty bits of scribbled-on cardboard embellished with glitter and 5-year-old scrawls, but that's what we were going to do anyway so this thread is reassuring :)

I think I might stretch to pot plants this year, DS's teacher and TA are apparently superhuman and definitely deserve it.

blissfullytired · 25/06/2013 08:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LauraShigihara · 25/06/2013 08:25

It's little something to say thank you, is it not? So, if you feel the teacher has been particularly kind and caring, or that your child has really enjoyed the year, then it is thoughtful to pass on a little something, whether it is a card, flowers from the garden or John Lewis vouchers.

It isn't a supplement to teachers' pay, as some parents seem to think. It is a thank you for helping your child through another school year and providing good pastoral care. That is why I never understand why parents make fuss when the teacher hasn't thanked them - you don't need a thank you for a thank you...

But it would have been polite for the playgroup staff to be more effusive. Manners cost nothing.

Original poster

SnoopyLovesYou · 25/06/2013 09:22

Well this morning when I dropped her off, they were colder than usual too! They have been really great but I pay almost £200 a month and I am a single broke parent. Don't like to think of them being cold with my DC on last week :-( Think I'll have to come up with a cunning present plan for the last day later in the week! All suggestions welcome. Some nice shower gel in a bag? There are actually 4 flipping members of staff in this particular Playgroup. As to how I knew they didn't like it, well the main teacher said it was nice but the other one (the one who is usually very warm with me and my DC) had a look a bit peeved and it was only last night that I worked out why- she likes to get presents!! And if I worked in a Playgroup, maybe I'd like a present too! Right, what am I going to get them before the end of the week. I really do want to show my appreciation (for the 4 of them!?) but no clue as to how I can make it inexpensive! Biscuits are no good as they will be closed in the summer. Something small and individual?

OP posts:

Original poster

SnoopyLovesYou · 25/06/2013 10:06

You know I think the problem actually may have been that my DC didnt make cards for all of them. Dammit! I think maybe that Playgroup assistant thought the card was for the other one and wondered where was hers. Actually the card was addressed to all of them but I only wrote that on the envelope! Oops!

OP posts:

MoaningMingeWhingesAgain · 25/06/2013 10:14

If they were arsey I certainly wouldn't get them something else too. Sod em.

Unless you want to buy them a book on manners.

largeginandtonic · 25/06/2013 10:16

I have 8 children, 7 at school/play school. The end if term fills me with dread.

jeee · 25/06/2013 10:18

I get boxes of chocolates from poundland. And I only do this because otherwise my children would be the only ones not bringing a present in with them on the last day of term.

AuroraAlfresco · 25/06/2013 10:20

That's unbelievable, Snoopy - how entitled do they sound?!

I am so pleased that noone in either of my DCs' classes seem to have taken the initiative to have a whipround this year. I only do it out of social pressure . And I don't think for a second either of their teachers will be remotely offended.

Might get DD to make a wee card tonight, but that's all

Original poster

SnoopyLovesYou · 25/06/2013 14:44

Chocolates from pound land sounds like it might save the day! :-)

OP posts:

Original poster

SnoopyLovesYou · 25/06/2013 14:46

In my local Tesco, they have beautiful bouquets of little roses for £3 so that's good for DC1's teachers maybe? Chock from pound land might be the very ticket for everyone else! ;-)

OP posts:

ellesabe · 25/06/2013 15:48

I'm a primary school teacher and the nicest thing I have been given at the end of the year (by a long way) was a card from the parents thanking me for specific things I had done for their child throughout the year.

It was really heartfelt message and the card went straight into my portfolio :)

shebird · 25/06/2013 17:43

Watching with interest as I always find this a dilemma. I bought presents for DDs teachers the year she left playgroup for big school but with teachers and TAs I'm never sure. I usually do cards (if i remember) and maybe poundland chocolates as a gesture more than anything. Always wince a bit when I see other mums with bottles of wine and more expensive gifts.

QTPie · 25/06/2013 17:50

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Picturepuncture · 25/06/2013 17:59

The best present is a letter to the head/play school manager outlining great things the teacher has done (copied to the teacher).

Next in my book is wine and chocolate.

But really, it's nice to get something...but not essential.

And 39 lots of scented candles is the pits. i know that's ungrateful and I do sort of appreciate the thought, but they are tat really, lets face it.

OP save your cash!

ESP. As they were rude to your face about it, that's outrageous. You're only getting my honest opinion because I'm hidden behind the computer.

stargirl1701 · 25/06/2013 18:01

God, no. I am a teacher. I much prefer a home made card...or a packet of Percy Pigs

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