Putting baby to sleep in another room

[WestieMamma]

Is this a complete no-no?

Baby is 6 weeks old. Currently he's in with us and I'm getting no sleep whatsoever. He sleeps very well and wakes up to feed once and then goes straight back to sleep. The problem is, it's like sharing a room with a gremlin. He's so noisy in his sleep that he keeps me awake.

He had his own bedroom (no in use yet) and I was wondering if it would be safe to put him in there instead with a monitor (with the volume turned down a bit). The room is an adjoining room, so his door is next to my bed.

Yes or no?

Thurlow, my dd would only sleep on either me or DH when she was little. One of us would take her up to bed at 6.30 & then sit holding her while she slept & then the other would take over after about an hr or so. DH was working full time whilst studying & we saw each other for probably about half an hr a day.

I put Dd in a sling during the day to do the cooking & cleaning (or I would put her down & have to do everything really quickly before she started crying). It is do-able, exhausting but do-able.

Things are a little easier at 8 months, but she still naps on me.

OP in answer to your question, keep the baby in with you. It won't be long before the grunts stop, but for now it is important that she sleeps in the same room - it's to do with the breathing reflex, which babies don't develop until around 6 months.

Both of mine went into their own rooms, with movement and sound monitors, at 8 weeks. Strangely enough it coincided with them sleeping through (my husband's snoring was probably disturbing them!)

The thing that gets me about the 24 hour a day guidance is that it is so restrictive and almost impossible for some parents, so I worry that some parents could really beat themselves up about it. I can see how that worked for you, forgetful and twenty, if you have a baby that likes to sleep in the sling (or even likes the sling) or will stay asleep if the pushchair is stationary. But if you have a baby who won't do either of those things, it must be nigh-on impossible, and could become something for a new parent to get very upset over.

Thurlow, my dd didn't (& still doesn't) sleep in the pushchair whilst stationary. She does sleep in the sling, but only after an elaborate affair of white noise, dummy & me bouncing on a gym ball (of all things).

Yes it's restrictive & exhausting & it's not so much "it worked for me" as "I have no choice, this is what I have to do to ensure my baby sleeps".

My point was that it is do-able & sometimes you do not have a choice, but to do what us mums with Velcro babies do.

I'm not intending to come across as smug btw & if I do, it's completely unintentional.

You don't come across as smug, and equally I hope I don't come across as judgy either I know some babies need to be held all the time and I can't even begin to imagine how restrictive that is. I think I'm imagining the situation where a baby is happy to sleep in its own cot/basket at night after being settled, but the parents feel they have to take turns to sit with the baby in silence so that one of them is always there. That's the kind of thing that I worry new parents will struggle with a lot.

Personally, i would stay with them though, or take turns with DP to stay with them, i just feel i would never, ever forgive myself if the worst happened and they were sleeping alone.

Fortunately my babies generally do not settle at 7pm in their cots, preferring instead a massive feeding session followed by extensive rocking/singing, so this is not usually a problem! Although i remember sitting upstairs in the dark with DS but not until about 4/5 months.

Parenting is hard in many, many ways, one if the hardest bits is sifting through the mountains of advice and working out what works for your family.

No you weren't Thurlow don't worry, but I just feel I have to justify myself sometimes as in RL some people seem to think that by being with your newborn all the time you're somehow setting yourself up for a fail.

What is the saying, "the first 6 months are the hardest"?? Too bloody right! 2 nights ago DH & I were able to spend some time together alone (dd in own room) for the first time since she was born (well apart from the first week anyway as she was in NICU) & what did we do? Watched Grand Designs !!