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Original poster

Eat with kids vs eat with DP??

72 replies

zazas · 24/05/2006 18:18

OK so do you eat with the kids so you have a 'family' meal together and install 'table manners' and make sure they eat etc OR do you wait until DP comes home and eat around 7.30pm so you two can have quality time together??????? By the way if I sit with them and don't eat - I ALWAYS eat some of theirs which is doing the waist no good!

OP posts:

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handlemecarefully · 24/05/2006 21:58

kama - I'm not coming to tea around your house then!

emkana · 24/05/2006 23:07

Dh is always home by about 5.45 to 6 pm, so we eat together as a family then.

FrayedKnot · 24/05/2006 23:12

I usually eat with DS at 5.30, put DH's on one side to cook / reheat later. I don;t want DS to eat alone. If I'm not eating a meal I have a snack sitting at the table with him.

At weekends we all eat about 6pm.

DH not usually home before 6.30 and it's too late for DS at the moment, hopefully when he's a bit older we will all eat together.

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Posey · 25/05/2006 16:31

I always eat with the kids and dh does too on his days off. He starts work at 4pm so isn't here at all for tea on work days. I must say I prefer it, get all cooking out of the way and cleared up by 6pm.

Twiglett · 25/05/2006 16:40

I always eat a little snack or something with the children .. but they're 5 and 2 .. I think if they were older I might wait

its not a spectator sport

it doesn't have to be your main meal (but many times it is for me) you could just make a small chopped salad or similar

if we have playdates I don't eat with them as I don't fit at the table when there's more than 6 kids here

kayzed · 25/05/2006 16:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

caterpiller · 25/05/2006 18:29

We eat together and I HATE it. Constant fighting, slow eating etc. Dh insists we eat together.

sallystrawberry · 25/05/2006 18:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EmmyLou · 25/05/2006 18:33

I always eat with dd1. dd2 & dd3. Dh often away for weeks on end and always home after 7 at least so there is no point not doing so. Dh is often not very hungry either - or might've had lunch at the pub. I was a vegetarian for years and he is a keen carnivore so whilst i do eat meat now, my idea of a meal is something with lots of veg and his is something veg free if i let him get away with it. As kids get older and stay up later that potential oasis of peace is lost amid homework and taking to scouts etc anyway. I have to laugh (with a large side serving of irony, of course)when health 'gurus' like Gilliam McKeith say never to eat when you are stressed - ha!

NappiesGalore · 25/05/2006 18:38

my (v young) kids usually eat better if the adult who prepared it is prepared to sit and eat it with them. wouldnt you be hesitant to eat something dished up to you that the disher upper wasnt prepared to eat themselves?
personally think family meal times are a treasured part of the day and are something im working towards (dp currently either isnt here or isnt hungry at 5, when the kids eat)
looking back to when i was a teenager, it is only when we gave up trying to do family meal time that we started to drift in different directions...its a chance to keep track of where you all are and what youre all doing.

clairemow · 25/05/2006 19:17

We eat together when we can - mostly at weekends, and I always eat lunch with DS (just 2). DH is never home in time for tea (at 5ish, as DS is always starving by then). But I do appreciate eating just with DH when DS is in bed, as we get to talk then properly. Luckily, DS is a really good eater, and I don't have to watch too carefully. He;s used to eating both at home and out - in cafes etc. or outside.

As DS gets older though I think it is really important to eat together as a family round a table at least once a day. When we were children, we had to lay the table for breakfast before bed - maybe this is going a bit far?!

handlemecarefully · 25/05/2006 22:00

"We eat together and I HATE it. Constant fighting, slow eating etc. Dh insists we eat together".

Caterpiller, I'm with you all the way. Life's too short and all that. There are more heinous crimes than not eating with your children because when you do it drives you %&*(ing spare!

When my children are older and perhaps more civilised I will revisit the whole thing

handlemecarefully · 25/05/2006 22:15

Rant coming - and in fact it gets on my 'somewhat less supple than pre-children' mammaries, all this maternal self flagellation along the lines of:

*thou shalt eat with your children even though you get bugger all peace and quiet all day, and eating with your young offspring will mean that you are so distracted that you won't even taste your meal thus denying you even this small pleasure

*thou shalt engage in creative play with your children for a minimum of an hour a day even though it makes your head implode

*thou shalt remember that the tv is denigrated as an electronic babysitter in some quarters and therefore shouldn't be resorted to for more than 10 minutes in every 24 hours, even if you do have 3 loads of washing to do,a meal to cook and beds to strip......

I think there should be a mums' revolution and a mums' charter to be utterly selfish and self serving occasionally and sometimes to say 'bugger what's best for the children'

Bozza · 25/05/2006 22:16

Well I think I have worked out in the past that I am the opposite of hmc. We always eat together at about 6-6.15 pm. As I work 3 days a week and don't get in with the kids until 5.50 this is somewhat of a challenge. But then it is out of the way, DH loads the dishwasher and we have the evening from 7.30 clear. DH eats breakfast with the children on the days I am working, and we both eath with them on the other days. I eat lunch with DD/them on the four days I am not working. On Sunday though they are both going to a party where the tea will actually be at a mealtime so DH and I will be eating after they have gone to bed. It will seem like a real treat.

MrsDoolittle · 25/05/2006 22:17

Lurve your tone HMC!!
How are you?

MrsDoolittle · 25/05/2006 22:18

Do you know I was thinking exactly this question the other day and whether to post it or not?

Of course you didn't, why did I say that???

Elibean · 25/05/2006 22:20

I don't think I'd eat with dd if I didn't enjoy it...I don't think she'd eat with me if I didn't enjoy it...but as for the TV babysitter, whenever I need to do some serious cooking or make an important phone call, have to admit I'd pay the blessed thing if I had to. And only the teeniest, occasional, smidgen of guilt...

handlemecarefully · 25/05/2006 22:20

The lo's are driving me nuts MrsD can you tell?

How are you?...and your chickens?

(Bozza are you the opposite of me in many ways or just over meal times, because I haven't really noticed this before [curious and intrigued emoticon])

MrsDoolittle · 25/05/2006 22:27

Two of my trio have gone broody!
Upset them greatly today when I chucked them out to clean their house!!!

I'm very pleased with them.

When are we getting together? Really need this weather to clear up.

handlemecarefully · 25/05/2006 22:30

How about next week (half term so no Pre-School for dd; so fairly flexible). Happy to drive over to you if you email me with directions / address. Would need to leave it until after Wednesday however to be on safe side (to ensure that ds who is currently suffering from chicken pox is no longer infectious)

MrsDoolittle · 25/05/2006 22:35

We are really easy to find.
Dd is in nursery Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, so maybe Friday?

I am also starting the delightful task of potty training her tomorrow - should be fun.

Anyway, I better not hijack this thread any longer.

Let's e-mail.

Night night.

handlemecarefully · 25/05/2006 22:38

Friday would be fine - yes email me (I'm crap and can't remember your email being utterly rubbish, have you still got mine?). Mental note to start entering emails addresses into my address book

Sleep well...

Tortington · 25/05/2006 22:48

it would depend on the age of the child and bed time.

my kids are older and so i would probably make a sandwich and cook a meal so we could all eat together.

however if my kids were smaller - i would eat with them

when dh got home i would sit with him at the table whilst he ate

this is what we do when i have an evening meeting. i think its rude to leave someone eating on their own whilst the other is watching telly or on the computer.

so dh always cooks my tea and sometimes at 11pm i eat my tea and he sits with me while i do.

having eaten his tea with the kids earlier

kayzed · 26/05/2006 00:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

brimfull · 26/05/2006 00:10

we eat together at 6ish because luckily dh is home at 5pm most nights.

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